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How to compliment and when?
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Author:  TonyS [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:35 pm ]
Post subject:  How to compliment and when?
I seem to have a problem with complimenting girls on their looks. From what i've read you're not supposed to tell a girl she's beautiful straight out unless she's your LTR. BUT i feel this strange urge to let them know, to express my admiration which is weird. For example this girl i've been seeing has the most beautiful green eyes i've ever seen and i just feel like i have to compliment her on that.

So how should i formulate it so it doesn't sound cheesy? Would a simple "you have beautiful eyes" work? Should i transition fast to something else like a question or just fucking look her in the eyes and smile? Would "you have the most beautiful eyes i've ever seen" be pushing it too much and AFC'ish?

At what stage in a relationship would it be appropriate to make appearance based compliments? (like "you're so beautiful", etc, because i hear people do this all the time yet i haven't)

I'm asking this because i've tried doing some genuine compliments (specific like eyes, earrings, w/e) where i saw fit and the girls would be "yeah whatever" although they'd thank me. They wouldn't genuinely appreciate the compliment, even girls that were interested in me.
Author:  Arcemu [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:40 pm ]
Post subject: 
Common knowledge, it is completely fine to compliment literally right after an open.
AS LONG AS you include a neg in there.
Compliments are okay, just make it on something like her hair, or an accessory she is wearing.
Author:  LD [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 4:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Common knowledge, it is completely fine to compliment literally right after an open.
AS LONG AS you include a neg in there.
Compliments are okay, just make it on something like her hair, or an accessory she is wearing.
I am sorry dude, this is not correct. it is indeed commonly said not to compliment, but i wonder why. And AS LONG AS you put a neg in there? why would it be absolutely necessary? it aint :).

Compliments should be genuine. If you think she has beautiful eyes, a simple: 'i think you have beautiful eyes' is enough. It might sound cheesy, but that is all there is to it. Given the context, a compliment to a woman can tell you already a lot about her. If you are in a nightclub and you compliment her on something, that is totally different then when you would meet somebody at the mall.

In the nightclub, every drunk AFC will prolly compliment her about something just to get her attention and to suck up to her. How can she know you are genuine when everybody does it just to get into her pants? At the mall, it is totally different. She isnt suspecting compliments over there. I hope you understand this nuance, this difference;

A person with good self esteem will be more accepting when receiving a compliment. They will be happy with it, without any more. Those who respond with: no way, or, i dont believe you or something like that, they dont seem to have that much self esteem.

In general, if i have something to say about the looks of a woman, i just say it. Its not a declaration of neverending love, at least it should not be. But it has to be genuine. Dont compliment her on her dress when you just met her. Who gives a shit about the dress? Or her hair? Its not something that is unique about her. If she has beautiful green eyes, that is something worth complimenting. Or perhaps an experience she has had, or an insight or something. i compliment them on that.

it is the intent of the compliment that really matters. If you compliment to manipulate, she will pick up your intent (unless you can act very good). If you just mean what you say, you dont really expect something from it. You just state it. Dont overrate compliments, they are just nice words.

cheers
Author:  Stylite [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 4:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
LD is right on target!

You have to adjust your game to the situation you're in. As he said, in a night club every AFC will be dousing attractive girls with compliments as they brush them off. The key to avoiding the brush off is coming in with something interesting and fun first (not to make it seem like you're trying to pick her up) and then reward her with a compliment just before you isolate her or during the isolation.

In day game, say at a local mall, you can easily compliment a girl right after opening up with her. It's a completely neutral environment where she's not necessarily looking for or getting attention, and you're the nice guy who was man enough to compliment her on something.

- Stylite
Author:  Phoenix_ [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 9:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
the-right-kind-of-complimenting-vt12409 ... highlight=
read
Author:  Arcemu [ Sat Jan 21, 2012 12:00 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Common knowledge, it is completely fine to compliment literally right after an open.
AS LONG AS you include a neg in there.
Compliments are okay, just make it on something like her hair, or an accessory she is wearing.
I am sorry dude, this is not correct. it is indeed commonly said not to compliment, but i wonder why. And AS LONG AS you put a neg in there? why would it be absolutely necessary? it aint :).

Compliments should be genuine. If you think she has beautiful eyes, a simple: 'i think you have beautiful eyes' is enough. It might sound cheesy, but that is all there is to it. Given the context, a compliment to a woman can tell you already a lot about her. If you are in a nightclub and you compliment her on something, that is totally different then when you would meet somebody at the mall.

In the nightclub, every drunk AFC will prolly compliment her about something just to get her attention and to suck up to her. How can she know you are genuine when everybody does it just to get into her pants? At the mall, it is totally different. She isnt suspecting compliments over there. I hope you understand this nuance, this difference;

A person with good self esteem will be more accepting when receiving a compliment. They will be happy with it, without any more. Those who respond with: no way, or, i dont believe you or something like that, they dont seem to have that much self esteem.

In general, if i have something to say about the looks of a woman, i just say it. Its not a declaration of neverending love, at least it should not be. But it has to be genuine. Dont compliment her on her dress when you just met her. Who gives a shit about the dress? Or her hair? Its not something that is unique about her. If she has beautiful green eyes, that is something worth complimenting. Or perhaps an experience she has had, or an insight or something. i compliment them on that.

it is the intent of the compliment that really matters. If you compliment to manipulate, she will pick up your intent (unless you can act very good). If you just mean what you say, you dont really expect something from it. You just state it. Dont overrate compliments, they are just nice words.

cheers
Misinterpretation of what I said, I said that IF you OPEN with a compliment throw a neg in there.
The topic was about how long to wait before giving a compliment.
Obviously you have to compliment women without negs, but when it comes to opening with one? In my opinion it just looks desperate.

I'm of course basing this on; A. Personal experience, B. Many of the examples of fail stories on here when guys compliment when it isn't needed, C. Mind of Mystery, How to be an alpha male, Real social dynamics, And the blueprint decoded.

It all depends on your particular style and way you go about things.
I just personally find it better to wait for conversation and formalities to be over with before you start complimenting.
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