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whats the first thing to work on ?
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=126355
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Author:  qcvsf [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 11:43 am ]
Post subject:  whats the first thing to work on ?

well considering i have
approach anxiety
social anxiety
i am not that good looking average
plus i use glasses
i dont know how to hold a conversation
i lack humour
overseriousness
over sensitiveness
i am not smart
not confident
clumsy
forgetful
not a good lier
conformist
closeminded
plus i live in an isamic country so no scope of meeting women
i started penpaling but i also think thats just because i cant make any real friends on my own
even there i cant attract girls
i had a lisp to
no knowledge of psychology lol

Author:  Arcemu [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 12:02 pm ]
Post subject: 

Be forceful with yourself.
Your one of those people I'm assuming places no structure in your agenda.
First develop a hobby. I don't care if it is making airplanes out of popsicle sticks but DO IT.

You need to be able to give your self a little direction before anyone can help you.
As in quit thinking of yourself so negatively.
Most men think they are unattractive. But here is the thing no matter what you look like your not the worst looking guy on earth, I'm quite sure.

I'd even say that before you seek advice from others you need to be able to at least try advising yourself in one way or another first.

But I can tell you the number one reason why people don't follow their own advice.
And that is fear of said advice being nothing more than invalid biased opinion due to it being a situation of their own.
It's a human defense mechanism forged by fear of rejection, even if one has never been rejected they have heard of and seen it therefore understanding the possibility.

Try the newb test stickied in this section of the site.
You go out and say Hello to every woman you see, maybe throw out a smile here or there.
And if one shows interest and you see a potential conversation then just try to start one no matter how brief.
It's a test that has no goals other than getting you accustomed to being verbal around people you do not know.

Cheers!

Author:  DJ_Z [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 12:11 pm ]
Post subject: 

Also:

1. Doesn't matter that you wear glasses if you took the time to buy a decent looking pair for some style

2. Being a conformist sucks on any level. Do things because you want to do them, not because you are worried what everyone else thinks.

3. You don't have to lie to pici up chicks.

4. Being closeminded sucks on any level.

5. You don't like the country you live in? move

Author:  papichulo818 [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 12:19 pm ]
Post subject: 

focus on the negative and that becomes your world. Start taking inventory of your more positive attributes and make them even better and there's nowhere to go but up.

Author:  qcvsf [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 12:58 pm ]
Post subject: 

Thanks thats really useful

Author:  SmoothOp [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:12 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
well considering i have
approach anxiety
social anxiety
i am not that good looking average
plus i use glasses
i dont know how to hold a conversation
i lack humour
overseriousness
over sensitiveness
i am not smart
not confident
clumsy
forgetful
not a good lier
conformist
closeminded
plus i live in an isamic country so no scope of meeting women
i started penpaling but i also think thats just because i cant make any real friends on my own
even there i cant attract girls
i had a lisp to
no knowledge of psychology lol
Motherfucker you are depressed! I have social anxiety aswell that I have been working on for 6 years. Firstly all these negative comments you have about yourself such as "no humour""too serious""not smart" ect... are all based on your anxiety. I'm assuming you have these traits deep down but can not express them to other people in social situations.

I too felt like I was some serious, quiet, not funny homosexual once upon a time because I was stuck in my head the whole conversation and couldn't even think. Mind Blank. People used to tell me I had zero expression in my face when I interacted with someone. Like talking to a depressed emotionless robot.

Fast foward a little, I have basically overcame social anxiety and bamm! Depression gone. And not surprisingly, I actually have all the traits I thought I lacked before.

So you need to work on the confidence first of all to get over your SAD(social anxiety disorder) and then depression. I can garauntee you that everything else will fix itself. My life was shit 4 years ago! I was seriously depressed and wanted to go live in the mountains like some hermit so I wouldn't have to encounter people ever again. I researched a million topics on the human brain and how it works, steps needed to gain condfidence and how to end depression.

This garbage you are dealing with is based on the way you were brought up and will need a lot of work to fix. I suggest you start imediately.

Pick up will not help you right now. It will make you more depressed, because you will fail. Trust me on this.

You could also see a congnitive theripist and take drugs.

BUT if you are just one of those "FML! internet on the airplane does't work, kill me!!" type of guys and think you have these symtoms but are actually just a whiney little girl then disregard all my advice.

Author:  qcvsf [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:29 pm ]
Post subject: 

well i do need a lot of work i know but i am willing to put the effort in to it .

Author:  Lambert [ Sun Jan 22, 2012 11:30 pm ]
Post subject: 

Strengthen you frame and Inner Game

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