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Flakey situation that's kinda weird
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Author:  shakenbake [ Thu Jan 12, 2012 10:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Flakey situation that's kinda weird
I have been working with this girl for about 8 months. We became good friends and always flirted and she told me about her personal experiences. I'd see her a few times a week at work. That's really the only time we'd talk.

Fast forward to 3 weeks ago:
I started texting her more and kept the convos going. Not boring stuff but funny stuff were I'd tease her. One of our coworkers who is 18 years older than us( I'm 21, shes 20, and he is 38 ) also became good friends with us. She would also tell him about her personal life. So I told him I started to like her and he became my intel into what she thought of me. He said she said she thought I'd make a great boyfriend but she's not looking for one at the moment. She just wants to date and have casual sex. Which I'm cool with.

So I decide to ask her out. She said yes, but to get other people to come with us. Which I took as a bad sign. My friend then told me that she doesn't know I like her so I have to show her, which is why she said to get more people together. So I got another couple from work. To make it short they flaked out to go with other co workers to watch the UFC fights that night. The girl I liked said we should do that instead. So I did and during this time I leaned over and told her that I really just wanted to hang out with her tonight. She asked why and I said to get to know her more outside of work. So she said ok and that we can hang out sometime.

Last week
So I asked her out last wednesday For us to go out to a bar on Saturday. I know a bouncer that wil get her in since she is 20. She said yes. Saturday came and we talked at work and I confirmed her yes. Got her address and I was ready to roll. I was suppose to pick her up at 9:30pm. 8pm I get a text from her saying that she didn't feel well and that she has to work early in the morning. I was pissed. So I went out with some friends. She texted me at midnight apologizing for not coming. I didn't reply.


Sunday
I talked to my co worker friend and he said he talked to her earlier and that she had hung out with another guy last night instead. Then they got in an argument. Which is why I think she texted me at midnight. what a bitch I thought.


Monday(earlier this week)
I see her at work. Here is the convo

Her: hey are u still mad at me?
Me: (no response as I walk around the desk where she is at)
Her: really? I said I was sorry!
Me: I'm not mad... Just confused because you seemed fine earlier and then u texted me saying that u weren't feeling good.
Her: we'll I told u earlier that I had a stomach ache. I just didn't think mixing alcohol and a stomach ache was a good idea. I felt like shit the next day.
Me: yep
Her: *sigh* well ill let u workout now.


So we haven't really talked since. I'm freezing her out. What do you guys think? Will she chase me or not?
Author:  papichulo818 [ Thu Jan 12, 2012 11:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
So, you caught her in a lie, and your ego is hurt because you discovered she was hanging out with another guy. You don't know who this other guy is - perhaps it's an ex who came out of the woodwork trying to mend things iwth her, or maybe a guy who she thought was just a friend but then tried to make a move on her that night. The point is you don't know. I can tell you personally however, that if I discovered that she'd lied to me to go and spend time with another guy then I'd drop her like a sack of potatoes (nobody likes to play second fiddle).

The BIGGER point is that she's under no obligation to you, and that your expectations got way ahead of you. Do you seriously think that just because a chick gives you her number and agrees to hangout sometime that she's somehow yours, or destined to be yours? Even dating a girl doesn't obligate her to be available to you at all times, and to not cancel out on you on occasion.

Quite honestly, you're making a mountain out of a molehill. You are being passive aggressive with her and that's not cool; you're giving her attitude/being cold and aloof in hopes of exacerbating her guilty feelings on cancelling. And on top of it all you want to "freeze" her out expecting she'll chase you? Buddy, give your head a shake - seriously your mind is in the clouds somewhere.

If she cancelled on you saying she didn't feel well tell her "No problem! Let's do this some other time I hope you're feeling better". Rather than be Mr. Poutypants (which makes you look like a sensitive little bitch). Also, stop talking to this mutual friend of yours about her, you have no way of verifying what he says as being truthful (he may in fact have his own agenda) and you're likely telling HIM things you should be sharing with her.

Again, I cannot stress this enough, KEEP YOUR EXPECTATIONS in check.
Author:  EddieFews [ Thu Jan 12, 2012 11:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
She is going to chase you, however I don't see why you would want to deal with her anyway. This would of been a deal breaker for me. I would of also made her feel really awkward when I saw her at work by calling her out on it.. When she said " I said i was sorry, i was sick".. I would of just came out like " oh yea? I heard you had a date"..

Its too late for that now though, stop pussy footing around and trying to indirectly show her your upset with her.. Women do that. If you have a issue, clear it out. In an unemotional kind of way. Your behaving like a woman thats been butt hurt, let it go and keep living your life. She'll come around.
Author:  Dr. Mooney [ Fri Jan 13, 2012 12:56 am ]
Post subject: 
Bang her brains out, and theb drop her...she'll be chasing you like no other then..
Author:  Marc [ Fri Jan 13, 2012 2:38 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Flakey situation that's kinda weird
Work Place Romance Never Good But lets look at your situation:
Quote:
.....She would also tell him about her personal life. So I told him I started to like her and he became my intel into what she thought of me. He said she said she thought I'd make a great boyfriend but she's not looking for one at the moment. She just wants to date and have casual sex. Which I'm cool with.
Why is she telling him about her personal life ?
NEVER BRING A THIRD PERSON INTO THE RELATIONSHIP. NEVER. How do you know that he doesn't want to BANG her instead?
Quote:
... She said yes, but to get other people to come with us.

She is not sure about you or doesn't like you enough YET. Its not necessarily a Bad sign. You'll face a lot of situations in the future where a Girl might want to be accompanied by her Girlfriend on the first or second time that they are out with you. Its just something that younger girls usually do, suck it up and play along.
Quote:
My friend then told me blah blah.......

.......So I did and during this time I leaned over and told her that I really just wanted to hang out with her tonight. She asked why and I said to get to know her more outside of work. So she said ok and that we can hang out sometime.
OKay.

Quote:
So I asked her out last wednesday For us to go out to a bar on Saturday. I know a bouncer that wil get her in since she is 20. ... 8pm I get a text from her saying that she didn't feel well and that she has to work early in the morning. I was pissed. So I went out with some friends. She texted me at midnight apologizing for not coming. I didn't reply.


She yet doesnt like you enough. Tell me one thing, except for flirting what have you done to connect with this girl. What does she know about you or you about her?

Side Note: Don't do anything that is illegal. There are a lot of places for having a good time than at a bar with 100s of other guys hitting on her and you competiting for her attention.
Quote:
I talked to my co worker friend and he said he talked to her earlier and that she had hung out with another guy last night instead. Then they got in an argument. Which is why I think she texted me at midnight.
You are sure He doesn't want to Bang her ? I don't trust this guy. If I were him and had your best interest I'd ask you to talk to her and find out for yourself.
Quote:
Monday(earlier this week)
I see her at work. Here is the convo

Her: hey are u still mad at me?
Me: (no response as I walk around the desk where she is at)
Her: really? I said I was sorry!
Me: I'm not mad... Just confused because you seemed fine earlier and then u texted me saying that u weren't feeling good.
Her: we'll I told u earlier that I had a stomach ache. I just didn't think mixing alcohol and a stomach ache was a good idea. I felt like shit the next day.
Me: yep
Her: *sigh* well ill let u workout now.
She is SOO Sweet !! :) There could have been a lot of ways that she could have blown you off. What are you doing man. She probably like you but is not a 100 percent sure. Why are you acting angry and affected.

Make her comfortable around you. Instead of acting angry, just greet her with a BIG SMILE AND SAY WASSUP. Seriously man, she probably likes you. She is 20yrs old, she is figuring out a lot of things herself. Make her comfortable, try to create a connection, get her out to hang with you, flirt, close the date with a kiss. And then take it on from there......
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