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| Author: | iMe [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | Stuck @ a sticky point |
Hey guys ! I wish I could post this in the right section, but I just registered today so I need a few more post and I'm not the type of guy who do spams just to reach the required amount :/ Anyway, I know this forum for quite some times and just didn't feel the need of posting until now -.- lol. Just so you can have an idea, I have so far no problems at all picking up girls during night time (just still have some issue with day games) and I met ALOT of girls last summer. Some of them are still "addict" in some kind of way. So yeah, I have no problem to attract a girl. I also know quite a few things in relationship (had two that lasted for 3 years each). Like most of us, I just wanted to have fun with girls until I met a sweet girl and of course, I found one. I played my game quite good on her (all the basic neg stuff, seems distant, lots of DHV right and left, spot the right IOI, etc.) and I had her in my bed after about 7 or 8 hours of "work". But unlike the others, I just slept with her cause I liked that girl and wanted to know more about this one. This might be odd, but when I "make love" to a girl which I barely know, I lose all my interest in to her. So didn't want this to happen this time. So yeah, everything went just fine. We are dating each others for 2 months now and every single time we are together, she makes me feel like she's in love (or REALLY close to it). She takes my hand, always hold me in her arms, kiss me, have an hard time to let me go every single time I/She leaves. BUT she's single since last August/September out of a relationship of 2 years. She dumped her bf cause she found out he was bi... She loved him, no doubt about it. That makes me feel like I might be a rebound... I also had a talk about this at the beginning of our dating. How not cool it is do this to someone (rebound) and blabla, so she was aware in some kind of way that this was not what I wanted. But last week (Wednesday), she told me that, about a week ago, she realized that she wasn't ready for a relationship yet. She realized it after I kissed her infront of my sis (she felt like we were really about to get engaged). In a normal situation, I'd have no doubt about the fact that I would be a rebound. But the thing is, she's not that typical kind of girl. Her friends are mostly all 4 to 6 (she's a 8 ), she's the "family" and "really simple" kind of girl. For probably the first time, I like a girl for her personality over her apparence .At Christmas, I sent her a cocky sms in which I told her I wish I would have been with her this night, she answered in the morning saying she was thinking the same thing but didn't know how to tell me. When I saw her last Monday (about 1 week after she told me that) she said that she really missed me and I finally made out with her this night after a great night at the bar with some friends. Well, you're getting to the point. As for me, I think I'm a rebound. Like when you go to shopping and you ask to put something "on hold" and continue shopping. But then again, I might be wrong, so I'm asking what you guys think of this situation and what would you suggest ? Thanks guys |
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| Author: | Slip n Slide [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 1:27 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I think that you're overanalyzing. Your label of "rebound" is one that I don't think about. I've never experienced it, I don't expect to see it so I never have. I think you have this misconception, that just because she started dating you quickly after the last guy, that she's going to leave you just as quickly. It straight up isn't true. Some girls just like to always be dating someone. |
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| Author: | iMe [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 1:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I think that you're overanalyzing. Your label of "rebound" is one that I don't think about. I've never experienced it, I don't expect to see it so I never have. I think you have this misconception, that just because she started dating you quickly after the last guy, that she's going to leave you just as quickly. It straight up isn't true. Some girls just like to always be dating someone.
I used a girl as a rebound once myself and have seen quite a few friends doing so. It does not happen quite often, but from what I understood, people with a strong "emotional feeling" feel the need of filling this empty hole after a relationship with the first person who gives them sentimental attention just to finally realize that this individual is not really what they are seeking. But yah, as I said, I might be totally wrong on this. I'm thinking of maybe just step back a bit and let her feel like she's about to lose me. |
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| Author: | Slip n Slide [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 7:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Stepping back for a week or so will almost never hurt a relationship, you're right. But still, you don't know for sure what her mental state is. After finding a rebound girl to fill an emotional gap, would you be more likely to stay with her if she was confident that you liked her, and could surprise you with interesting sex once in a while, or if she was insecure about being a rebound, and kept questioning whether the sex reminded you of your last girl? Confidence will always take you further than worrying about things you can't control. |
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| Author: | iMe [ Fri Dec 30, 2011 2:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
You got a point here. Just out of curiosity, do you think I should have a word or two about this situation with her or simply act like it doesn't bother me at all ? |
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| Author: | papichulo818 [ Fri Dec 30, 2011 3:06 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
You might be the rebound, then again, you might not be. Who's to say (she probably wouldn't even know the answer to this question right now). More importantly, at this point it shouldn't even matter. Why? Because even if you are her rebound, this doesn't mean you're disqualified as potential boyfriend material. Don't count yourself out of the game, unless she completely ignores you, or gives you the whole "let's just be friends" bit (although this doesn't mean it's impossible the two of you will ever hookup). Right now you questioning as to whether you're her rebound or not is hurting your approach. Instead, your M.O. should be "this girl digs me as she's spending her time with me - she can be spending time with her girls or any other guy but she's choosing to do so with me. She just needs the time to warm to me." In the mean time just keep doing what you're doing. Show her a good time, make her laugh, fill her with positive vibes. The more QUALITY time she spends with you, the more she'll feel comfortable around you, the more she'll feel it is natural for her to be with you and that she (not you), made the right decision. My 2 pennies worth. |
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| Author: | iMe [ Sat Dec 31, 2011 9:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Just so you can have a lil update, Ty for the replies, was helpful. However, I just found out yesterday night that the girl was dating an other guy at the same time lol (but she doesn't know that I know this). Should I just move on ? It sucks, I do love her. But yeah ..there's plenty of girls out there. |
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