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| Having problems in the 2nd - 4th date stages. https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=122849 |
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| Author: | vetteguy02 [ Fri Dec 09, 2011 9:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Having problems in the 2nd - 4th date stages. |
disclaimer: I'm not new to the PUA community but I am new to the forums. I haven't really been actively using many of the techniques, I'll admit ! I'm having problems with my game, and was wondering if you guys could give me some advice. Some stats about me: 28 yrs old, about 8.5 out of 10 on the attraction scale (so I've been told), make $75k - $100k a year, drive a corvette, and have friends. So things are going well except for my building attraction part ! Also, I've been working 60 hr weeks so I've been meeting women through online dating only lately. Generally, I have NO problem getting past first date. 2nd date I usually get to. Always kiss close on 2nd date. Its that 3rd and fourth date I seem to fail on. By the 3rd or fourth date, I'll usually get a text sometime in the following week saying, "I like you, but I dont know what I want. You are fun, but I dont think this will work out, there's no chemistry btwn us, " yada yada yada. Obviously this is very generalized, so bare with me. And feel free to ask me to specify to further pin point the problem. my assumtions 1) The women are physically attracted to me or else they wouldnt go on a 2nd date with me so thats not a problem. 2) I'm doing something right in the first date, that I dont care on to the others. 3) I'm not building seduction into this. I'm treating them like too much of a friend and not a girl I want to fuck (although I thought I was doing this, but I'm probably wrong) 4) I dont consider myself needy, so thats not a problem. Help ? |
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| Author: | ItsAlwaysOn [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 4:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
my first thought would be that youre not fun enough, but it seems as if they think you are. could they be lying? also, describe some of the first dates youve had where things fizzled out. |
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| Author: | mi1ooo98 [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 4:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you're staying the same as the first and 2nd date and not changing, they're going to get bored. This is one of the reason girls end up with arseoles, because you never know what the arseholes are going to do next. It's unpredictable and keeps their excitement peaked. |
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| Author: | GKS [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 6:15 am ] |
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I would say because you have a stable job, and safe personality which they can find in any other rich guys. They probably didn't find excitements in you, there was comfort but not enough attraction was built. Like you said, they might agree to go on dates with you because of your look and social value, however after spending time with you, they found no attraction. Work on your inner game, and try to sexual escalate. If you have no intention to sleep with them, make it VERY CLEAR at the beginning. DO NOT ask or MISLEAD them into thinking you're on a date yet you're treating them like friends and not escalate (make you appear as a safebet, nice guy, or wuss, whatever you call it ) |
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| Author: | vetteguy02 [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 12:17 pm ] |
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I think you all may be right. My dates usually consist of some place to grab drinks. I don't usually do dinner until a 3rd or 4th date. Maybe I'm doing a boring date, and not escalating enough. I am indeed staying the same as the first and 2nd date. Not escalating sexually enough and just boring them into thinking there's no chemistry. There's a clear reason why I can get to a 3rd or 4th date, but have it ALWAYS fizzle out. Its a sexual thing. I'm clearly not getting sexual enough |
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| Author: | GKS [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 5:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I think you all may be right. My dates usually consist of some place to grab drinks. I don't usually do dinner until a 3rd or 4th date. Maybe I'm doing a boring date, and not escalating enough.
You don't have to do dinner, drinks are fine. But have couple venues in mind so you can go to after the drinks, something fun and active (something you're good at preferable). And ESCALATE ! I am indeed staying the same as the first and 2nd date. Not escalating sexually enough and just boring them into thinking there's no chemistry. There's a clear reason why I can get to a 3rd or 4th date, but have it ALWAYS fizzle out. Its a sexual thing. I'm clearly not getting sexual enough Still the most important is your mindset, if you're out just to get it over with and not enjoy it, they can sniff it out and ofc there will be no chemistry. Think of it as an fun game, go with them, try all the bizarre stuffs that you came across in PUA community. Don't afraid to step out of your comfort zone, so if you offend them, so what? Least you have balls and be able to test out what works and what not. You're gonna lose them anyway with what you have been doing so far, so what do you have to lose? |
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| Author: | Bo_Darville [ Sat Dec 10, 2011 9:11 pm ] |
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I feel for you man, I'm having the exact same problem lately. I'm a big fan of the "lets get together for drinks" first date too, and that usually goes well. The last one I did that with was last night, and we're going out again tonight, in fact I'm trying to think of something different to do as to not seem boring. I did this last week, and didn't get past the first date with that particular girl. Girl before that after the 5th date I got the" I don't feel a connection with you, but you're a great guy and I'd like to be friends...my friends thought you were alot of fun too and they really like you". Haha, first time a chick's friends liked me more than she did! Anyway, some good avice here so far, I'll try to remember it. Do different things to keep it fresh, and make sure to escalate as to not get into the friend zone. Definitely something to remember! |
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