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| Finally getting to know a girl I've known for years..Advice? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=119610 |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Wed Nov 02, 2011 9:55 am ] |
| Post subject: | Finally getting to know a girl I've known for years..Advice? |
Yes, another post of mine seeking a little advice... You may have read my other post explaining my current situation..my girlfriend and I broke up...she keeps texting me almost every day, etc, etc.. But during time of us being apart, I've started talking to this girl who I've known for years. We have never been close friends...but part of the same social group, so we've known eachother a while..Just never tried to get to know eachother, you know what I mean? Well lately on facebook we have been chatting. And its pretty nice..so far we have just talked about her schooling, the tv show Dexter, jobs, her new apartment, she opened up to me about why she had made a new face book account (because someone made a fake one, and was harassing her, calling her a dumb whore, etc.)...Needless to say, I've been enjoying our conversations. So far we've had 3.. One of them lasted from 1am to about 2:30am, that was just a few nights ago. But I really don't know what angles to take on her...I am enjoying talking to her, and getting to know her some...And we both have the same favorite TV show..So I was thinking of a way to ask her to come watch it with me, but in a way which she would love to accept....Timing has to be good, because she had to work the night it came on last. But I dont wana mess up any of the potential.. The girlfriend I had is a mutual friend of hers....so she knows her. She knows we dated for over a year. And she knows we broke up earlier this month. So I also do not want to come off like I'm just trying to get her to hangout because I'm lonely. Like I said, I've known her for a long time, but I never gave it thought to get to know her...So any advice would greatly appreciated. Considering things we've talked about, I feel there have been many opportunities for me direct the conversation in a whole other direction..But I just didn't have anything to say before she continued....a good example, when she was talking about her new apartment lol Or when we were talking about what shes going to school for, and what she wants to do in the future.....in which when she was done explaining, she asked what it was that I wanted to do...so I took time to tell her. She seems interested in our conversations..its never one sided..meaning, one of us is never talking more than the other..its back and forth constantly until one of us has to go (its usually past midnight when we chat, and usually we both have to wake up somewhat early the next day) So again, I would greatly appreciate any feedback, tips, advice, etc. Thanks! |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Thu Nov 03, 2011 7:08 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
no one has anything to suggest??? come on now lol |
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| Author: | EddieFews [ Thu Nov 03, 2011 2:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
It seems like you just have to inject some life into the conversation.. You guys are keeping it light and friendly, which is cool because you don't wanna give the impression you're just using her to get over the last chick. However, i wouldn't advise talking to this chick unless its a sure go, because you ex will find out about it. Although if you succeed at banging this new chick, your ex will want you back more than she already does. The way you start the conversation with someone will usually determine the direction it will go... Give this conversation starter a try, On the night of dexter.. message her " hey, you coming over to watch dexter or what lol" She respond friendly, wether she wants to go or not and her response will be a great way to begin some flirting. (I'll take some reputation points for all this hard work lol.) |
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| Author: | ALFIE_RAFC [ Thu Nov 03, 2011 2:48 pm ] |
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Do you know where she socialises? The reason I ask is that it would be good to know whats clubs/pubs she goes to so you can turn up (unintentionally) of course and speak to her there. This would be good as you can have a night out with her and get to know her better without the pressure of a "date" It also shows you are a sociable guy with friends who likes to go out and have a good time. |
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| Author: | cixxy [ Thu Nov 03, 2011 6:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
mm u spent that much time talking... please dont tell me its just via text messaging as in non-vocal? cuz u wont build too much attraction if its just text on a side note i am not sure if its a good idea taking her out on a first date watching dexter i mean cmon the show is about a serial killer.... you dont want her to feel at risk |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Fri Nov 04, 2011 2:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: mm u spent that much time talking... please dont tell me its just via text messaging as in non-vocal? cuz u wont build too much attraction if its just text
we talked on face book..so yeah, non-vocal..Shes usually at school most the day, then work the whole evening until close..So by the time she gets home its usually past midnight when we chat....and Dexter is her favorite tv show....one of my favorites as well. So I don't see how it would make her feel "at risk" being it is her favorite show, and something that we have a lot in common with..Plus she is a Criminology major at the Criminal Justice Department at our local college...So a tv show about a serial killer is right up her alley lol
on a side note i am not sure if its a good idea taking her out on a first date watching dexter i mean cmon the show is about a serial killer.... you dont want her to feel at risk |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Fri Nov 04, 2011 2:35 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Do you know where she socialises?
The reason I ask is that it would be good to know whats clubs/pubs she goes to so you can turn up (unintentionally) of course and speak to her there. This would be good as you can have a night out with her and get to know her better without the pressure of a "date" It also shows you are a sociable guy with friends who likes to go out and have a good time. A group of us would meet up a couple times a week at a local bar...But the 2 people that always made a point to make sure everyone went, moved away...Plus I was in a relationship at the times too...But she has said on a couple occasions of us talking that she hasn't been to the bar in a long time, and that she really doesn't talk to anyone now days, or hang out with anyone. She goes to school, and works...every once in a while she'll go out with her female friend and her boyfriend..but the rest of her time is just sitting around her apartment. |
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| Author: | cixxy [ Fri Nov 04, 2011 7:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Quote: mm u spent that much time talking... please dont tell me its just via text messaging as in non-vocal? cuz u wont build too much attraction if its just text
we talked on face book..so yeah, non-vocal..Shes usually at school most the day, then work the whole evening until close..So by the time she gets home its usually past midnight when we chat....and Dexter is her favorite tv show....one of my favorites as well. So I don't see how it would make her feel "at risk" being it is her favorite show, and something that we have a lot in common with..Plus she is a Criminology major at the Criminal Justice Department at our local college...So a tv show about a serial killer is right up her alley lolon a side note i am not sure if its a good idea taking her out on a first date watching dexter i mean cmon the show is about a serial killer.... you dont want her to feel at risk Anyway u should see if she has a mic and SPAM or somethn or like one of them apps where u can talk for free. take it the next step up.. . too much text = lets just be friends |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I dont even have a webcam or mic lol....my computer is outdated as a muh fucka....but anyway, she had gone on vacation..but just got back yesterday...which was her birthday. Dexter came on last night, so I posted on facebook "DEXTER!" and she had replied saying something along the lines of "Dont give any spoilers! I can't watch it tonight!" I knew her and her girlfriend were going out for her birthday, so I didn't mention coming over and watching it.....I probably could have said something though..but, didnt. |
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| Author: | EddieFews [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
next message.. " i won't watch it either! i'll record it and we'll watch it together :p" |
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| Author: | swagstar [ Mon Nov 07, 2011 10:54 pm ] |
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Ask her out on a date and learn to kino escalate if you want to move above friend zone. Be the alpha, stop being so laid back and shy. |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Tue Nov 15, 2011 11:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Its been a while since I talked to her.... But last night at like 2:30am..., I'm tired as fuck watching Mystery's Project Hollywood videos....But I get a notice from facebook that she posted on my wall talking about how the last episode she saw was crazy lol I get the feeling that she only initiates conversation when she's drunk. There has been times we've had good conversations during the day time tho, but I initiated those. Anyway, I wasn't really in the correct head space last night as my energy and focus wasn't where it needed to be in order to escalate things when I began talking to her. After seeing her post on my facebook, I messaged her.. It went something like this: ME: haha what episode are you talking about? HB: episode 6..downloading 7 now. i got a little behind when i left. you wanna know something fucked up? i dont care if you wanna know im gonna tell you cause i just saw it and i wanna tell someone ME: haha what? **She signed off chat, but then posted on my wall again...then a couple minutes later got back on chat** HB: ok i think its works now ME: you forget how to work facebook? HB: i just saw this girls status on my cousins facebook, and basically it says she had a misscarraige cause she was 15 weeks pregnant..someone actually clicked like...wtf who likes that shit.....and no my chat wouldn't work it said there was a problem and they were working on fixing it. they fixed it pretty fast too ME: lol thats pretty crazy..not your typical face book post HB:no..i dont even know the girl..but it makes me pretty mad that some dumbass is stupid enough to click like..i dont even know what to say..im blown away..im going to try to put that out of my mind and pretend people are not as stupid as they are ME: lol i dont know what to tell ya...i mean...thats not something i would talk about on face book like that if i was a girl lol HB:i wouldn't either..but i wouldn't like it...the last episode of dexter i saw was when at the end he kills the guy that killed brother sam and then his brother appeared..the look on dexters face when he got angry and was trying not to kill that guy was awesome ME: haha yeah it was good shit..i actually thought he wasn't going to kill him..fooled me HB: me too lol ME: he was like fuck brother sam's last wish!! HB: i think i need to watch the next one but i have to wake up in 4 and a half hours ME: i have to wake up early too...but not that early..gotta wake up at like 8 and be outta here by 9 HB: any luck finding a job? my store is closing.. im looking for a new job now too ***I tell her a few places of the places I've applied at this past week, and explained that I have an interview later this week**** HB: good... im afraid im going to be jobless and not able to pay bills ME: well...yeah that sucks haha i know the feeling..i cant wait to get a check HB: you get unemployment? ME: Nope HB: that sucks ME: its tough..but its only temporary HB: true..good positive thinking! HB: i gotta go! deb just said trinity killler!! i gotta find out what this is about! ME: hahah good night HB: Goodnight So basically.....another conversation, which in my opinion didn't really lead anywhere..Granted I wasn't in the right head space....But I still need to get better at switching into the right head space. I need to get better at talking and leading things to where I want them to go Its obvious we share common interests.... She seems interested in my life when we chat. In this conversation she asks if I've had any luck finding a job...But in past conversations she's asked what I'm interested in, and what I'd like to do career wise, and she seemed genuinely interested thru all of that..So I look at that as a positive thing..an IOI, if you will. But where do I go from here? That's what I'm lacking...I know its as easy as attraction, building comfort, setting a date, and escalating everything the entire time... But, I just don't know how I should go about it. I want to be sure there is enough comfort there before trying to escalate things to the next level and scaring her off. Next time I talk to her, I was going to get her number and invite her to come watch the show next time....and hope it all goes smoothly lol |
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| Author: | EddieFews [ Wed Nov 16, 2011 3:46 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Shes interested bro... Here wat you do.. Just inbox her this message now. She'll comply.. "hey gimmie your phone number, the next episode of dexter's at my place over popcorn lol" something like that... lol, im a little tipsy, but its okay to go for the kill now. She deff has interest in you. and she isnt exactly seeing anyone, also she will be looking for something/someone to fill in the place of her job once its gone.. Perfect opportunity.. Think of this as a reward from the god, for puttin up with that ex of yours. |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Wed Nov 16, 2011 4:52 am ] |
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haha okay... So I messaged her cuz she was online.. We start talking, I opened with asking her how dexter was.. She mentioned she stayed up to watch it, and was too tired to go to school today lol But from there, the subject went to her work, which is closing a fuck ton of stores (including hers) across the country...as we already know. Well she typed what I referred to as a BOOK on how to close stores, and be an asshole manager for trying to keep it a secret.. This is the chat starting from when she had got done typing that "book" HB: give me a dollar and i will say "because" one more time in that sentence ME: what will you do if i give you 2? haha HB: i guess i'd have to say it 2 more times ME: haha you didnt really say it that much HB: i think i did..like 5 times ME: yeah but you typed a book pretty much on the process of *Store name* closing and how managers are dicks...so i think it pretty much evens out HB: hahaha lol good then ME: whats your phone number, HB? HB: 555 555 5555...apparently im having trouble with it though..i kept texting people tonight and i thought they were all ignoring me and i got mad so i texted *girl friend* and said help and she called me..so i wasnt getting text messages until i turned my phone off and back on and thats the second time it happened,,wow im talking a lot ME: yeah you are...thats the 2nd story you've given me tonight..i mean..book HB: sorry i am drinking beers..not a lot of beers, but enough to make me talk alot ME: im guna be well educated tonight...how to close stores, be an asshole manager, and how to get your phone to send/receive texts...not bad HB: hahahaha ME: Well I gotta get outta here, i'll blow up your phone a little later to make sure it still works properly HB: ok, seeya I thought it was interesting that she gave the number up, no problem...but immediately gave an excuse as to why she might not get my call/text lol But all in the same, that shit happens to my phone every once in a while..It will just stop sending/receiving texts then randomly start again after a reboot.. |
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| Author: | motownsoul [ Wed Nov 16, 2011 9:51 pm ] |
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Any suggestions to further escalate things? |
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