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Keeps telling me she is busy.
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Author:  beed [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 7:11 am ]
Post subject:  Keeps telling me she is busy.
Guys,

I need your help. I am totally new to texting game. The last three girls I saw tell me they are busy, maybe next time. I never hear form them again.

This girl i'm texting now, I've known her for years but we never communicated before. She asked for my number during a party. She seemed to me into me.

I texted her on three occasions. Once to see how she was doing. The last two times out to coffee. The first invite said she made plans already but asked if i'm free the next week. Now I text her today if she is free for coffee. She said she is working (she works in retail on nights) didn't purpose a different day.

Guys, I feel like I've been down this road before. It might get wired because our parents are friends and we may have to see each other again.

Any advise?
Author:  Mack 2.0 [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:48 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Keeps telling me she is busy.
Quote:
Guys,

I need your help. I am totally new to texting game. The last three girls I saw tell me they are busy, maybe next time. I never hear form them again.

This girl i'm texting now, I've known her for years but we never communicated before. She asked for my number during a party. She seemed to me into me.

I texted her on three occasions. Once to see how she was doing. The last two times out to coffee. The first invite said she made plans already but asked if i'm free the next week. Now I text her today if she is free for coffee. She said she is working (she works in retail on nights) didn't purpose a different day.

Guys, I feel like I've been down this road before. It might get wired because our parents are friends and we may have to see each other again.

Any advise?
never text a girl to ask "how she is doing?"

- are you conducting a fucking poll?

second, don't ask her out for coffee

- seems needy. instead tell her about this awesome coffee place that is amazing, how you are doing at such and such time, and how she should drop by...if she likes amazing coffee of course!

?
Author:  iLoveTurtles [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:52 am ]
Post subject: 
There is only two reasons you will ever text a girl.

One: If you want to build rapport. That means anything that makes her think of you whether it is same hobby, someone looking similar to her etc...

Two: Asking her out on a date.

Obviously 1 comes before 2. If you don't do enough of 1 you don't get 2.
Author:  bansario [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 11:17 am ]
Post subject: 
Women too busy = women don't want things to happen.

Coffee vs Drinks: Winner = Drinks

Drinks vs Some other cool activity = Draw

Busy women vs solid Game and skills: Winner = Women not so busy anymore.

Busy women vs Date plans during the week: Winner = Women not so busy anymore

Busy women with Busy schedule vs Guy they want to date: Winner= Women making plans with you for another day in the near future.

Hope it helps
Author:  beed [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 3:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
Alright guys, thanks for the advice. No more "how's it going?" type of texts. I already asked her twice and both too busy. How to build rapport? What's my next move?
Author:  dave622 [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 6:13 pm ]
Post subject:  RE
If a woman says that she is too busy, you don't need to give up hope, but you MUST work harder. That includes manning up and calling the girl -- texting shows weakness and shyness. Also, girls really do love to be taken out to dinner, and she would be much more inclined to agree to a formal date than a super-informal coffe-text-proposal.
Author:  stugots [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 8:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
The Mack and Dave gave you some good advice.

I find the texting thing gets a little tricky. I know the first inclination is that she's blowing you off and people my tell you that, but she very well might be, well, busy. If she is, simply going for a cup of coffee may seem more trouble than its worth. Whoever had the hyping the place comment was dead-on; think of it as selling, which essentially you are.

The only time you txt a girl "how are you?" is if it is someone you know well and they travel a lot or perhaps even live some other place and you don't do it often....two times a day?! I mean jeez. Also, in my experience and players, correct me if you think I'm wrong, if a girl really doesn't want to see you, she'll simply not respond at all. To txt, even a simple, "I'm bust maybe next week" takes too much effort for someone you're not into.

I understand it's a tough call some times, because women, regardless of what they say, do like to be chased (you just need to know if they want YOU to be the chaser :-) )

J.
Author:  bansario [ Thu Oct 27, 2011 9:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:

Also, in my experience and players, correct me if you think I'm wrong, if a girl really doesn't want to see you, she'll simply not respond at all. To txt, even a simple, "I'm bust maybe next week" takes too much effort for someone you're not into.
This is not entirely true. A lot of women are polite enough (more than you guys think) and will give you the "maybe next week..." speech out of courtesy. If you keep pushing, yes, they may stop answering back, but initially many of them don't stop answering just because. I mean after all, they gave you their numbers, right? ;)

The key is to understand how she's saying it. If she says "I can't go out tomorrow, maybe next week" is not the same as "I can't go out tomorrow because I have a family dinner, but I'm free on Sunday night if you want to get together..." See, different.

In both answers she blew you off, but in the second one she presents the opportunity of meeting up by giving you alternatives.
Author:  beed [ Fri Oct 28, 2011 12:29 am ]
Post subject: 
Alright guys, i'm thinking of not asking her out for now but to build rapport. She must be too busy. I feel with other girls, I was rushing things and they flaked out. With this girl I should slow down. I should txt her a statement. I guess something funny I saw today? see what she respond with?
Author:  PokerSlot [ Fri Oct 28, 2011 2:51 am ]
Post subject: 
I think this all boils down to one thing:

Make statements, don't ask questions.

Asking questions seems needy, as discussed above. Making statements, then "inviting" her along to join is alpha status.
Author:  beed [ Fri Oct 28, 2011 8:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
Guys, i'm stuck at what to day next. Make a statement.... Ok. Should I just say something that I saw today that was interesting ?

I am also waiting because she said she will be out of the country but I don't know if its now or in a few days. I don't want to just send a statement txt and not know it she got it or not reply.
Or I can just ask...then what's next if she gone tomorrow?
Author:  stugots [ Fri Oct 28, 2011 8:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
I definitely go with the advice of the guys that have been still in the game for awhile, but, having a plan or something to do I always remember women like; so perhaps you go with that.

A good friend of mine, female friend, told me when we were both much younger (say late 20s, early 30s) that one of the things she really HATED when guys asked her out is when they didn't have a plan; and it didn't necessarily have to be grandiose, she just wanted to know what they were doing so she could prepare/dress accordingly...(they like to feel special) and other reasons which aren't important to the post. The last thing she wanted to here was... "What do you feel like doing?" (Save that for when you're maried... ;-) )
Author:  OhmsLaw [ Fri Oct 28, 2011 9:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
I say fuck those text messages and give her a call.

No needy stuff like if she is free or not - who cares? You should not care - you just want to have a cup of coffee and you're inviting her. If she's busy - ok, she's not busy - ok.

Don't get so frustrated that she's busy maybe it really is - however she would offer you another time and if this is not happening then maybe you've lost your part of a game.

Just give her a call and pretend that you do not bother that she blocked your 3 attempts. Really it just hurts you :)
Author:  stugots [ Mon Oct 31, 2011 10:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I say fuck those text messages and give her a call.

No needy stuff like if she is free or not - who cares? You should not care - you just want to have a cup of coffee and you're inviting her. If she's busy - ok, she's not busy - ok.

Don't get so frustrated that she's busy maybe it really is - however she would offer you another time and if this is not happening then maybe you've lost your part of a game.

Just give her a call and pretend that you do not bother that she blocked your 3 attempts. Really it just hurts you :)
That was the other thing this friend/girl told me, she hated texts. Her attitude was if he really wants to go out with me, he'll take the time to call me (and plan something). We all get caught in the txt thing, and I guess it's not a bad way to stay in front of someone when you, they or both of you are busy...
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