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difficult amog school/work, nonpick-up
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Author:  behind_the_wall [ Mon Oct 24, 2011 7:41 am ]
Post subject:  difficult amog school/work, nonpick-up

I'm having difficulty dealing with an alpha personality type in a classroom setting. I'm looking for some psychology and course of action advise since pick up artistry seems to revolve around this somewhat.

Our class is small, ten people. We are forced to share each other's company for near work-week amounts of time. We have a long semester and a half left to complete our health care accreditation. This includes non-paid internship.

the amog- twice my age, larger framed, ex military in this health field, testosterone using, three times divorced, possible cyclical or bipolar

There is no winning with this guy. He has more than a leg up on the rest of us with experience and knowledge. Most of the class is constantly verbally assaulted. When practicing, it's impossible to dodge harassment whether you step-up to instruction or try to slide under the radar. He is degrading to most of the classmates save his favorites. He will even speak against you while you are performing testing for state certification.

What I'm looking for are some ideas as to what drives this person's motivation and how to disarm him. Verbal slander is whatever, but this daily beratement has become a testing obstacle.

My only ideas:
-commit more of my life to this study than I already am and try to out score him
-completely deprive his attention seeking
-even the playing field by stooping down a level and fighting back
-develop some indirect approach

Author:  Olivier [ Mon Oct 24, 2011 8:34 am ]
Post subject: 

You aren't dealing with an Amog, you are dealing with a bully, his frame doesn't matter since he can't physically attack you in class....right?


Just don't give him too much credit.
When he asks you something pretend you don't hear him the first one or two times.
If he ever starts bragging in the form of a story (I benched 150kg dude!) Just reply cool story bro! Calibrate it! Yawn while you are saying this, or turn away from him....it shows disinterest in a passive way (you can't really be blamed for it or get commented on it)
If he starts verbally asaulting you, plain ask him: What's wrong? My comment/existence couldn't have upset you that much, so whats up?
You can just imagine his possible reactions:
- He gets deffensive "Nothings wrong"
- He tries to flip the frame, by turning the attention on you and your (possible) shortcomings
- More verbal assault

Just being prepared helps a lot!

People often automatically start talking louder when they are trying to impress or get their point across, just point it out to them that there is nothing wrong with your hearing yet/ Meassure the distance and ask if he learned to speak in a helicopter.

The only way he can reply is by either trying harder, which makes it seem obvious to the others as well as to himself that he is now playing by your rules, and he is trying to make you feel something. It is all about turning this frame of mind around.
He's no longer the guy that is impressing, he is the guy trying to impress.....
He is the one who cares about your opinions, but you aren't giving any feedback to this.

Keep in mind that the first few times, this will have a very low percentage of succeeding. From your post I can deduct that you are most likely not naturally alpha (Me neither:P) So you'd have to learn, but hey that's why we are here right?

Stand up to a bully once and you will get a huge target on your back.
Stand up to a bully frequently and you will be respected for it. By your classmates as well as the ex-marine know-it-all with a larger frame ;)

Author:  lukeyx [ Mon Oct 24, 2011 9:05 am ]
Post subject: 

everything Olivier just said

To show disinterest, do these;
- body language never facing him
- eye contact for a very short period of time, then look away to act uninterested, he'll most likely look like a fool too
- short answers to show lack of interest (or maybe just a nod or something)

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