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Having girls as friends.. a total waste of time?
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Author:  Sway321 [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 9:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Having girls as friends.. a total waste of time?
Hello guys, my question as stated above comes from a particular situation I got my self in. I use to be the nice and funny guy that girls would like to be around and talk to but nothing else. No sexual attraction there what so ever, at least that I could spot. After trying to rewire myself, i'am begning to realize more and more that having girls as friends is probably the biggest waste of time any man could have because if you find them at all attractivem you end up liking them and by then, the women has friend zoned you and well that's that. Right now I can only justify befriended a women if you are genuinely interested in that girl for a long term relationship. The only girls I ever talk to now are the ones that I have some kind of alternate intend. That is, you got it, to get some! .. Why else would you look for a relationship for a women?

Is this a immature way of thinking? Or I'am I just being blinded harshly by the "game"? What do you guys think about having females are friends. ?

I discussed this with one of my last friends that is female the other day, and all she told me was that I was now only "thinking with my other head." hah, I suppose she's right. I want to find a way to get her attracted to me as well, but after this talk, I doubt there is any room for that.

what do you guys think?
Author:  Formula7 [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 9:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Girlfriends are useful. Also, normal people have both girls and guys as friends. I listen to a few of Gambler's lectures and it also talks about having girls and male non-PUAs as friends. Don't get so sucked up into the game that you forget to live your life. Part of what is going to attract a girl is the awesome life you live (this is especially true for when you decide you want a long term relationship).

Having girls around can do a number of things:
Hang out with them to get away from the general guy mentality and (yes, I'm gonna say it) get in touch with "the other side."
Most of all, if you're really in the game. Girls have friends who are, you guessed it, also girls! Girls are a part of your social circle, especially the "just friend" types. You have a girl that you FZ's or that FZ'd you... who's to say she doesn't have a friend that you could potentially develop relations with. Worst comes to worse... THAT girl has MORE friends! The great thing is... you get a lot more time not having to worry about opening cold sets. Having girl friends is good social proofing and even goes as far as to being good pre-selection. Girls tend to be more comfortable when you have had past girlfriends and current friends who are girls. It speaks to them saying that you have something attractive about you that makes you date-able, and you're not so much of a creeper that girls can't even keep you as a buddy.

Keep the girls. They are going to be one of the keys to your success. Learn about the game from other guys here, there, you go sarging with, etc. But you can learn a lot of other general life stuff from the opposite sex, too.
Author:  Lodewijkp [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 9:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
i befriended 2 woman last week... they have hot friends lol ... social proof and social compliance...
Author:  DJ_Z [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 9:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
That is one of the mistakes I made when I first learned about game. If a girl had a boyfriend, wasn't interested, etc, I assumed it wasn't worth keeping her number. That's a foolish decision. First of all, having friends rocks, that's a pretty basic concept. Second, female friends have additional female friends that can become your friends and friends+benefits if you game right :D. Finally, going out with women will make passersby view you with more interest. Why are those three girls hanging with him? He must have something going for him. Hell, even if they are just his friends he must have a great personality then!
Author:  Formula7 [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 9:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Finally, going out with women will make passersby view you with more interest. Why are those three girls hanging with him? He must have something going for him. Hell, even if they are just his friends he must have a great personality then!
HUGE winning point right here. Remember, at clubs/bars (or anywhere really). Being out with girls and having a good time with them is a triple whammy. Social proofing, pre-selection, and DHV all mixed into one giant bag of awesome. Get girl friends... get girlfriends. Get it? 8)
Author:  bansario [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 10:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having girls as friends.. a total waste of time?
Quote:
Hello guys, my question as stated above comes from a particular situation I got my self in. I use to be the nice and funny guy that girls would like to be around and talk to but nothing else. No sexual attraction there what so ever, at least that I could spot. After trying to rewire myself, i'am begning to realize more and more that having girls as friends is probably the biggest waste of time any man could have because if you find them at all attractivem you end up liking them and by then, the women has friend zoned you and well that's that. Right now I can only justify befriended a women if you are genuinely interested in that girl for a long term relationship. The only girls I ever talk to now are the ones that I have some kind of alternate intend. That is, you got it, to get some! .. Why else would you look for a relationship for a women?

Is this a immature way of thinking? Or I'am I just being blinded harshly by the "game"? What do you guys think about having females are friends. ?

I discussed this with one of my last friends that is female the other day, and all she told me was that I was now only "thinking with my other head." hah, I suppose she's right. I want to find a way to get her attracted to me as well, but after this talk, I doubt there is any room for that.

what do you guys think?
It's not necessarily a waste of time. Let's take the gender aside for a second, and only take into account the term "friend".

Your "friends" are people you like and trust for who they are. You don't expect much from them except for support, and to be there in the good and bad times (even though this doesn't always happen).

If you're talking about female acquaintances that's a different story.

So, let's now consider whether to have female acquaintances or not.

In summary, you should have them because:

1) You get to learn about women simply by interacting with them. You see patterns, traits, and things you probably wouldn't get by hanging out with dudes.

2) Women can validate you, and give you tons of social proof. Have you ever considered going to a club with a bunch of your female friends?! If you do, and assuming you don't come off as the "gay" guy in the group, other women will be totally interested in finding out more about you. "What's so special about him?" it's a common question they may get to ask themselves.

3) Even if you're in the friends' zone with a woman doesn't mean that you can't sleep together. The more game you learn, the better your skills, the more it will be reflected in your behavior. Women who are your friends, will see the difference and may want to change the status from "friends" to whatever it is they want.

So, don't think about having female friends as a disadvantage. It's in your best interest to hang around with as many women as possible if you're in this community.

Live and learn, and grow all the way.

Hope it helps :)
Author:  Defy [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 10:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Finally, going out with women will make passersby view you with more interest. Why are those three girls hanging with him? He must have something going for him. Hell, even if they are just his friends he must have a great personality then!
HUGE winning point right here. Remember, at clubs/bars (or anywhere really). Being out with girls and having a good time with them is a triple whammy. Social proofing, pre-selection, and DHV all mixed into one giant bag of awesome. Get girl friends... get girlfriends. Get it? 8)
For me this works if I go out just to have fun. I live in a big city and there are all sorts of logistics you have to take care of in this case. You also spend way much more money this way. And you kinda enjoy your self, don't have that hunger and tend to become passive sometimes.=. At least I do.

If I go out specifically for the purpose of sarging I go out by myself or with a wing and I know I have to push myself.

I am not advocating one way or the other, I'm just saying that social proof and what have you won't get you laid per se. You still have to do some heavy lifting.
Author:  Formula7 [ Fri Sep 23, 2011 10:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Finally, going out with women will make passersby view you with more interest. Why are those three girls hanging with him? He must have something going for him. Hell, even if they are just his friends he must have a great personality then!
HUGE winning point right here. Remember, at clubs/bars (or anywhere really). Being out with girls and having a good time with them is a triple whammy. Social proofing, pre-selection, and DHV all mixed into one giant bag of awesome. Get girl friends... get girlfriends. Get it? 8)
For me this works if I go out just to have fun. I live in a big city and there are all sorts of logistics you have to take care of in this case. You also spend way much more money this way. And you kinda enjoy your self, don't have that hunger and tend to become passive sometimes.=. At least I do.

If I go out specifically for the purpose of sarging I go out by myself or with a wing and I know I have to push myself.

I am not advocating one way or the other, I'm just saying that social proof and what have you won't get you laid per se. You still have to do some heavy lifting.
This is truth. And a good caveat. I was in no way saying that it makes it effortless to get what you want, but it sure as hell can help. Walking into a night club with a bunch of girls (granted being able to not come off as the gay friend) has a lot of advantages to approach priming and getting you into cold sets. From there you've gotta work it out.

Lol @ Heavy lifting. Off topic/Random: I am a power lifter/crossfitter so I tend to think of other things when I hear that. Made me laugh the way you related it.
Author:  skills360 [ Sat Sep 24, 2011 1:02 am ]
Post subject: 
I love having female friends(i hate male friends all they talk is about getting laid, and sport, video games and cars), but for gaming i don't, i know they do give you super strategic advantage, but for me is uncomfortable, specially when they see me making out with multiple girls(i got a hear a stupid speech of what whore i am all the time), i do have club hang out girls, but not friends, i like it that way better.
Author:  RiskTrump [ Sat Sep 24, 2011 6:46 am ]
Post subject: 
i suggest you watch Adam Lyons youtube videos. Those vids will answer your question directly.
Author:  Ezo [ Sat Sep 24, 2011 12:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
Like skills says!

Is it a waste of time to have friends?

Does it matter if they are men or women?

Are you trying to sleep with everyone you meet?

I personally think that women are more interesting to talk to, generally speaking. Unless the guy is extremely intelligent that is. Women often have more interesting opinions and think clearer, guys have to put all that macho competition stuff into their conversations. Saying what needs to be said but still make it clear that they are manly, not gay, sexual and tough. Girls just say what they think. And frankly, since pickup is my interest, girls understand me better than most guys.

So, no female friends are the best ever!
Author:  skills360 [ Sat Sep 24, 2011 3:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Like skills says!

Is it a waste of time to have friends?

Does it matter if they are men or women?

Are you trying to sleep with everyone you meet?

I personally think that women are more interesting to talk to, generally speaking. Unless the guy is extremely intelligent that is. Women often have more interesting opinions and think clearer, guys have to put all that macho competition stuff into their conversations. Saying what needs to be said but still make it clear that they are manly, not gay, sexual and tough. Girls just say what they think. And frankly, since pickup is my interest, girls understand me better than most guys.

So, no female friends are the best ever!


Exactly!
Author:  Sway321 [ Mon Sep 26, 2011 1:23 am ]
Post subject: 
awesome responces guys. All these responses have really made me re consider this subject. I guess Ill be going back trying to recover a friendship I recetly lost because I did not want to spend what I thought to be "useless" time with a girl that was simply a friend of mine.
Author:  devi4nt [ Sun Oct 02, 2011 2:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sorry to bump this but just wanted to share my experience last night relating to this.

I kind of used to think the same way as op.

I never really believed in social proof either. I know it existed but becuase I never really go out with girls on nights out I've never really had the oppurtunity to see it in action.

Then last night I was out with my 4 flat mates and one of their sisters (5 girls). I actually got opened by 3 girls just for that fact.

One even asked if I was fucking all 5 :lol: She said it looked like they were all fighting over me.

Having girls as freinds is so worth it! It was great to see how powerful social proof can be.
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