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Let her call now?
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Author:  GoingPlaces [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 8:02 am ]
Post subject:  Let her call now?

Have seen her a few times, always during the day time??? So far has refused to meet in the evening time, but has always counter offered some time during the day. She does have a boyfriend that stays at her house quite often though.

Last week, she wanted to get together Thur & Fri I was busy both days. Called her Sat about a BBQ Sun. She did not commit to coming and wanted me to call her Sun. Figured she could not come from the way she was talking about her plans so did not call Sun, I had already told her about it Sat. anyway!

She called Monday about being bummed I never called her back on Sun, and asking if we could meet Tue, and Thurs (Was already planned). Bailed Tue when she wanted to go to a shoe shop (again mentioned I did not call her Sun. and what she had done so she could make it.). Today (after she attempted to come to pick me up where I was without me knowing she was coming there), wound up meeting at time/location we had already agreed) asked me about doing something later on - no rush, not today but sometime soon at her house that would only take me 5 minutes.

Texted her this evening, she immediately replied, then after my second text waited for several hours and called me. Said she was sorry about not responding she was on the phone (only has a cell) and was doing her school work (online). I told her I was eating (I was) and I was about to hang up as soon as she got finished saying that. Immediate Bye, bye. I tried calling her back about an hour later, no answer. I know my number showed up on her phone no matter what she was doing.

Now we have already arranged to meet next Thur, with her more than likely coming to get me (no car) but most def meeting up. From her pattern she will call no later than Mon/Tue.

So, just wait until she calls now? How to handle it if she does wait 5 days to call back instead of the next few days knowing I tried to return her call? I have no doubt she will call by Tue to make sure I am still going to meet her on Thurs (Insecure about me not showing up????).

Also, I haven't asked what is in it for me yet, I needed to check something before I could commit to what she was asking (also what the two texts tonight was about, I was going to say I could, but didn't get around to letting her know). It is something in my field of work, and I would normally charge $30 just to show up. She knows it is "work" for me... so?????

If it matters we are both 35+.

Author:  Don Draper [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 8:08 am ]
Post subject: 

Well, that was a mind bender.

If you are getting riled up about her calling schedules, there is a bigger problem to deal with here.

Your inner game issues need tuning, man.

Who gives a damn when she calls or not, you should limit your attachments to women.

And don't make her your only option, she hasn't made you hers, has she? (read boyfriend mostly at her home)

Author:  GoingPlaces [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 8:14 am ]
Post subject: 

I am new, its a question on what to do to make sure I dont screw up. I am not attached lol.

Author:  pumpington [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 8:27 am ]
Post subject: 

go out, approach other girls, if she seems really interested try to have sex with her, if not don't put very much effort into it, just find new ones, on to the next one

Author:  GoingPlaces [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 9:08 am ]
Post subject: 

Ok guys, I asked several questions. I am not sure what to because I have not gone to meet her twice when she wanted to meet up. I did not call her back to meet up with me when she wound up changing her plans (which included blowing her bf off - not literally) around to be able to. I blew her off as soon as she called me this last time. So, 3 of 5 times she wanted to meet, we didn't, and once when we did I took off even though she wanted me to stay with her when she wanted to go buy shoes. Guess I am worried that she may think I am making her work too hard, or not interested enough in her. She is doing all the work, calling, trying to arrange times for us to get together.

I do approach others. I am not stuck on her, I am not worried about just getting laid, that is the easy part. Getting one to be a FB, FWB, or stay around longer than a night or two is the hard part, at least for me. This one I know is pretty interested, up to now anyway. I already know she is not for me long term, but I would like to get farther than just a ONS.

So, back to the questions perhaps? A little more specific advice rather than just general? Should I call her or just wait for her to call me, and regarding her asking me to come to her house for a 5 minute job, should I charge her as I would anyone else, or just do it and see what happens as it seems more of an excuse to get me to come to her house.

Author:  Don Draper [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 9:58 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
So, back to the questions perhaps? A little more specific advice rather than just general? Should I call her or just wait for her to call me, and regarding her asking me to come to her house for a 5 minute job, should I charge her as I would anyone else, or just do it and see what happens as it seems more of an excuse to get me to come to her house.
Well, there is a certain limit to which the "playing hard to get" thing works. Even if it is unintentional.

Everyone likes to chase, but only till a point.

If you frustrate her repeatedly by showing disinterest, she will actually start focusing her attention to guys who, in her eyes, are at least interested in her too.

Start showing a bit more interest in her. If she's making all that effort to make plans, least you can do is to show her that you appreciate that.

And if you are going to her house for your job, be a professional. In a profession, feelings come a distant third to your work and your pay.

Author:  GoingPlaces [ Fri Sep 02, 2011 10:44 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:

Well, there is a certain limit to which the "playing hard to get" thing works. Even if it is unintentional.

Everyone likes to chase, but only till a point.

If you frustrate her repeatedly by showing disinterest, she will actually start focusing her attention to guys who, in her eyes, are at least interested in her too.

Start showing a bit more interest in her. If she's making all that effort to make plans, least you can do is to show her that you appreciate that.

And if you are going to her house for your job, be a professional. In a profession, feelings come a distant third to your work and your pay.
Thank you.

Yes it is unintentional on my part, I try to stay busy during the week. I could make more time though. I usually just do what I want, when I want. That being said I do schedule those things the majority of the time in advance. She was trying to call and arrange meetings within the next 24-48 hours. To stay busy and manage my time, I am scheduling things 48-72 hours in advance. I did say something to her about that, and that is when she asked me about Thursdays during a specific time frame, which I am doing.


I am self employed, not worried about my work being affected. I do have to work, but I can choose where and when I do it for the most part. Not sure if I would be supplicating if I was to do it for free when she knows I would charge someone else. What she is asking to be done, there is a limited amount of people that has the knowledge needed. Like I said, it is only a 5 minute job. I get paid more for what I know, rather than the work I do. Hope that makes sense.

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