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50 Cold Approaches "I like you..."
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Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 1:34 pm ]
Post subject:  50 Cold Approaches "I like you..."
Hey Guys,

I got one really big issue in my game: To make things romantic/personal.

I am fine with approaching, I am okay with approaching anxiety, I am fine with escalation, game, small talk and so on.

But I really have a problem in getting things personal. I have a transition problem: To turn an approach to something romantic.

So here is what I am doing:

I will approach 50 girls absolutly direct with "I like you..."

May it sounds cheap, but I tell you guys: It scares the shit out of me. Really. I am more willing to die than to show a girl: "Hey, I am here because I am a guy and like you!"

I dont know why. But I have to solve and fix exactly this "I dont now why".

I will post my results here. Starting from now!
Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 3:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hell, this really scares me. I am into day game right now. And no clue what to do only by these simple words "I like you".

I am sure this whole Mystery Method stuff was invented by the scary truth of a simple "I like you!"

I have to make it! Really! Go Go Go!
Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 4:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
Honestly, this is fucking weired.
I have no problem open any set of girls in a club but I can not say "Hi, I like you" in the daytime. It does not make any sense to me.
It's an simple moment of friendly honesty - and I can not do it?
It's like I dont have any program for it in my head. Just an empty space.
How can I fill it?
Author:  afc_gone [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 4:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Go to a girl and say:"Hey, I Mike you" I bet she'll be like wtf. To wich you respond: " I totally so mike you"

Than the next line shold be:" I strike you"
Than the last :"I like you"

That way you'll see they are only words. You just say them.
Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
Ha Ha, thats funny. But wont work in German (o:

But wait, maybe I should fake a tourist and talk in English to german girls. Funny idea.
Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 6:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
Epic failure today. I fucked it up.

Not one single approach.

With indirect oder complimenting openers I can easily approach 10 sets withing 3 hours in daygame.

But I can not say "I like you". Its completly out of my reality.

The pitfall with these indirect or or complimenting openers: They are social. They work. They build good and solid social skills. But they dont open for romantic encounters. And that´s what I want.

The worst thing here: I am fully responsible for it. I can not excuse or whine. I simply cant get of my save social comfort zone of charming and indirect openers. They feel godd, they are safe - but they are not made to build a honest romantic tension right from the start. I dont want to play qualification games. I want to be honest with girls. Plain and simple.

But to be honest to myself here: It seems that I am still far away from that state of natural game.
Author:  DannyLeville [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 8:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
I will solve this one!

I know if I will make the first two or three approaches this way I will make it. I just need to overcome these first three approaches, maybe just the first one.
Author:  DannyLeville [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 8:32 am ]
Post subject: 
Finaly I did it!

And wow, it was a failure. She gave that "Oh boy, please leave me alone" face. He He He... But I dont care. I did it. That´s what´s count for me.

Girl No 2 was resonding better. She was quiet flattered. We talked shortly but I was leaving quickly because I female friend was waiting for me.

So:

Girl 01: Epic failure
Girl 02: Nice response

It´s not an easy game. In Germany direct "I like you" approaches are a very, very big deal.

Germans are very very closed. A direct "I like your" puts a lot of social and emotional pressure in the first moments of the approach because it´s so rare and I guess girl´s have no clue to respond and handle it in a appropriate manner. It´s very challenging.
Author:  Hennessy [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 12:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Can you please describe these 2 interactions in more detail?
especially the 1st one that did'nt go all that well :)
like I want words that you said( offcourse translated to English)

Because ( I might be wrong) if you literally go to a girl : I like you! you're gonna scare the shit out of her :D trust me, I've been there
Author:  DannyLeville [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 5:52 pm ]
Post subject: 
@Hennessy

I am thinking about to adjust my "I like you" approach. I guess it´s too much and to scary for a woman. Especially in Germany. It´s a very big deal here.

Its a very profile of high social risk vs. social reward in it. If she likes it, if she has a crush on direct men with balls, you will be rewarded big time. But you have make 20 women in a row to get there (minimum). I am pretty sure.

1. Failure: I saw her, I was pretty sure, she was giving me a smile, so I just steped to here and said: "Hey, I like you..." and she responded by leaning back ang giving me that awful irritaed "Uaaaah... nooo..." face. May I moved too fast, came out of nowhere, leaning in too much and too much energy at all. It´s too much. I fully understand her reaction.

2. Good response: I was kind of smarter. I approched her directly: "Hey, I saw you there. Wow, you look so great. I really like you. I like your style, your dress. You awsome. I had to tell you, really!"

She was so flattered, so kind and happy. Far more better than No. 1.

Another point here:

No. 1 was just about the approach. Nothing real in it, nothing special. I am pretty sure girls have very good adjusted antenas, what is real and makes sense in a social way. I was using the girl for amusement and to overcome my fear. So she bits my face. That´s okay.

No. 2 was far more real. And I guess, that´s what´s make the difference.
Author:  Hennessy [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 10:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
hmm... good thinking! :)
I think what you are missing here is a preframe, and unknowingly in the 2nd opening you used it!

just coming out of the blue and saying You're cute! or I like you! Is too stressfull for the girl, she can genuinely get scared( Had that happen to me , lol was in a mall with a m8. opened a girl with hi! what's your name? and she was just like why? and ran off, 2 mins later she's walking with her dad and pointing at me , haha -> I felt like a criminal :D )

I don't know if your familiar with Andy Yosha but there are some great clips of him and Yad( who taught) him doing infield for free, and you'll see how they do the stops which are crucially important before actually saying the point,

so 1st you get her attention and then it only matters what you say! :)

Good luck and hope I've been of some help! ;)

p.s.
I'll send the link in private message to you, cause I can't post links yet with my post count
Author:  DannyLeville [ Sun Jun 05, 2011 7:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
Preframe is exactly the missing element.

I am pretty sure now, that´s this was the source of my fear to approach women this way. It´s not social calibrated. It feels wrong.

I was thinking "sticking point", approach anxiety, fear etc. - but now I am pretty sure, that this inner pressure was just a sign of the social inadequacy.

Let´s look at my two examples:

The good one: A nice preframe created a warm welcome. Because it meets the inner social rules of women (and of a quality man as well).

The bad one: Just hitting. There is no game in it. No frame. No social adequacy, not even emotional adequacy.
Author:  Hennessy [ Mon Jun 06, 2011 6:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Glad to see we found your problem point :)
you pinpointed good, and now you can fix it

Hope you implement this, and please let me know how it goes , I'm eager to hear from you as you do new approaches
Author:  Fvckitimout [ Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:23 am ]
Post subject: 
Your no1 seemed more sexually charged, the girl prolly felt that you saw her as easy.

No2 was more lighthearted, not quite sure for your goal of heing romantic off the bat, but based on a guys concept of romance id say no1 was more romantic.
Author:  DannyLeville [ Sun Jun 12, 2011 7:33 am ]
Post subject: 
03: I told a Mom how beautiful she is. Wow, she was so flattered.
04: Told a girl her smile kicks me off the feet. Great flirt, she was so flattered and charmed.
05. Told two girls: "Wow, I really appreciate that you both are trying to stalk me. I really like you two beautys trying hard on me."

This kind of stuff works. They are charmed, they are flattered, they appreciate it.

This straight in your face "I like you" stuff does not work. (Maybe it works for really, really good looking man. But I am not in this Top 5% of men, so I stick with charme, humor and confidence).
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