PUA Forum :: Problem with starting the relationship

Venue Looping is also referred to in "The Game" as Time Distortion.

Anyways, you shouldn't have said the "no friends" thing. That was super needy.

Whenever a girl gives you the LJBF speech, just agree with it, and continue escalating with her as if nothing happened.

Thank you for advice, but does it look super needy when I said that I can't be your friend because I'm not that material...I am more than friend to you or nothing. If I said "more than friend on nothing" then the "nothing" says that I am willing to walk away from her. Or does it still look needy even when I said "or nothing"?

And there is another problem also: She is VERY busy girl. We hook up like 1 time a week...for an hour or two in town, we walk or go to pub. It's like way too little time. How can I convince her to spend more time on me?

Author:	SummerNight [ Tue Feb 03, 2009 5:06 pm ]
Post subject:	Problem with starting the relationship
I have a problem with this girl. We meet like 1-2 times a week because she is very busy and has a million hobbies. Firstly I used cocky- funny like 4 dates a row. On third date we kissed and we have a lot of fun, but the problem is that she says she doesn't want a relationship yet and she is afraid of relationships. She said she hasn't had many (or any proper) relationships yet (she is 17/I'm 19) and she doesn't know me well yet and she want's us to be friends first so she can learn to know me. Well, I said, no friends...and she was ok with it and we decided to coll our communication as a state of "seeing each other". I know that I have fcked up the part that I didn't build massive rappor. So...what should I do and how do I get to build massive rappor so she would start thinking on me a lot and start putting her hobbies a bit aside to meet me. Thanks!

Author:	LEPRECHAUN [ Tue Feb 03, 2009 5:35 pm ]
Post subject:
I take no credit for this article. This was taken from this site: http://ezinearticles.com/ How to quickly build rapport with women. Take her to multiple venues and locations in a short period of time. That's it! It's called Venue Looping... Why does this work though? It can't be that simple now can it? Oh, but it can. There is an interesting phenomenon that occurs when you are able to take a girl to a lot of different venues in a short period of time. It will feel like as if she has spent a lot more time around you and that she knows you a lot better. For example, if you start the interaction in a restaurant, be sure to get her to go shopping with you, stop by at a bookstore, go get some ice cream and then wander around to different locations. If you do this properly she'll have so many different memories of you in different places she'll feel like she knows you better. Just remember, you need to keep the time you spend at each venue not too long but not too short. Just long enough for her to remember that you two shared an experience there and that when she thinks of you again you'll be inside her head in a lot of different places doing all these cool things. This is a trick to build rapport really quickly and it really helps you get to know her well and FAST! --- 1. Pay Attention Now some will say that you must make continued eye contact, but, you know, some folks find that invasive and threatening. So match what they do, if they look at you, look at them. But whatever you do, ensure that you give an appropriate level of attention to them. In Dale Carnegie's wonderful book, 'How to Win Friends & Influence People', he tells a story of how he sat next to someone at dinner one evening. All night his fellow guest talked; all night Carnegie listened. A few weeks later, he was amazed to hear from a mutual friend how interesting his dinner companion had found him - even though Carnegie said virtually nothing all evening! 2. Value Them ...which leads us to how you relate to them. If someone is talking to you about something, make sure you show you value what they are saying, by asking them at least one additional open question about what they are talking to you about. Remember these? The 4 W's of HoW (yea, I know!), What, Where or Who - perhaps not Why, which can be seen as a challenge at the start of a relationship. 4 easy, helpful, interested open question types. 3. Be Like Them By matching physically, you will make a far greater impression. So, if they are standing, stand, leaning forward, lean forward. Ever spoken to a child? What did you do - you crouched down, didn't you. Why? Because you felt more able to communicate. It works well for big people too! 4. Follow Up How often have you discussed something and then it hasn't been followed through afterwards. Promises not kept. And how did that leave your relationship with that person? Not good eh? Following through on what you promise is not just good practice, it is vital if you want to build a strong, trusting relationship. People notice, even when you don't. Also remember to underpromise and overdeliver. 5. Laugh a Lot Laughter is a powerful tool in building relationships - you are sharing the same emotion, in the same moment. Ever seen two people in fits of laughter? How strong was that bond then? Pretty strong, I guess. Ever been there yourself? Yes, you know the feeling. It works, so share the fun and joy of the moment. 6. Hear Them It is not about listening, it's about hearing them. So what's the distinction here? It means being so with the person that you sense other things beneath the words. This is a very powerful tool you can use. Further sensitive questioning then adds into your evidence, which can give you great clues to help build the relationship. 7. Be The Audience Remember that when you are talking, you might be using the same language, but you hear it with different ears, different experiences and altogether a different 'take' on the words. A great coach I know, Elaine Wylie, had a problem with her cell phone one day and heard a serious echo. She heard herself fully before her caller responded. It was very revealing. So hear what you are saying from your audience's 'ears'. 8. Give space - Listen up Have you ever spoken to someone uninterrupted for as long as it took to say all you had to say? Were there spaces where it went quiet? What did you say next? In Nancy Kilne's great book 'Time to Think' she explores great exercises to do just that. The experience is magical. Give your listener space to talk and let them fill the silences. You will have pure rapport and a recognition that you care so much. Hope this helps you build rapport.

Author:	SUB-ZERO [ Wed Feb 04, 2009 12:17 am ]
Post subject:
It sounds like you genuinely like this HB. I guess if she just wants continue "seeing" you than you'll have to do that. Make sure it is not just as friends and that you are kissing and escalating your physical connection. If you can repeatedly K close , than you will be in a position to let her know you don't want to have her as a FWB. She might be trying to put you into her friend category. Take it as far as you can, don't put all your eggs in this basket though.

Author:	Munroe (MUNROE) [ Wed Feb 04, 2009 2:17 am ]
Post subject:
Venue Looping is also referred to in "The Game" as Time Distortion. Anyways, you shouldn't have said the "no friends" thing. That was super needy. Whenever a girl gives you the LJBF speech, just agree with it, and continue escalating with her as if nothing happened.

Author:	nightrider767 [ Sat Feb 07, 2009 9:25 pm ]
Post subject:
Yeah, the no to friends thing can look needy. Course I guess it depends on what context you put it in. If you need to recover, I'd say say something like "Look,, about the no to friends thing. That just weirded me out. Like I was was gonna be your brother or something. What's the name for the guy you call when it's time to have some real fun?". Or whatever... you get the idea. Good luck.

PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Problem with starting the relationship https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=38643	Page 1 of 1

Author:	SummerNight [ Sun Feb 15, 2009 8:26 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Venue Looping is also referred to in "The Game" as Time Distortion. Anyways, you shouldn't have said the "no friends" thing. That was super needy. Whenever a girl gives you the LJBF speech, just agree with it, and continue escalating with her as if nothing happened. Thank you for advice, but does it look super needy when I said that I can't be your friend because I'm not that material...I am more than friend to you or nothing. If I said "more than friend on nothing" then the "nothing" says that I am willing to walk away from her. Or does it still look needy even when I said "or nothing"? And there is another problem also: She is VERY busy girl. We hook up like 1 time a week...for an hour or two in town, we walk or go to pub. It's like way too little time. How can I convince her to spend more time on me? Thanks

Author:	LEPRECHAUN [ Mon Feb 16, 2009 5:27 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Thank you for advice, but does it look super needy when I said that I can't be your friend because I'm not that material...I am more than friend to you or nothing. If I said "more than friend on nothing" then the "nothing" says that I am willing to walk away from her. Or does it still look needy even when I said "or nothing"? If you really did say this to her, and she says that she is very busy and cuts her time with you short, then she is feeling that vibe of you wanting to get with her hardcore. And thus is the reason why she is telling you that she is busy. Next time you talk to her, when you are walking or whatever, you need to tell her that you do see her and you being friends only. Put her in the friends zone before she puts you there. I always tell girls before they even have a chance to LJBF me, "I don't see us more than friends, there's this aura around you that just screams friend to me." This gets them thinking that cannot have me (which they work harder to get me) and it also makes them think (what aura do I have, maybe this is why I don't have a BF, maybe he can help me out, maybe I'll sleep with him so he'll tell me)... Now, don't get it twisted, the last part that is in ( )'s might never happen, has not happened yet, just through it out there in case you get a girl that will sleep with anyone, but if this is the case, we would not be having this discussion now would we. XD ON THE OTHER HAND: If you did say this to her, and NOTHING has changed... and I mean NOTHING... Then she just blew it off because she don't really care if she loses you as a non-friend or not. Just go with the flow of things and tell her that you've been thinking and that you just want to be friends with her. Cold hard truth... you cannot win them all. With success comes many failures. Quote: And there is another problem also: She is VERY busy girl. We hook up like 1 time a week...for an hour or two in town, we walk or go to pub. It's like way too little time. How can I convince her to spend more time on me? Even though I don't see this going no where, I will post about this as well... You could go buy tickets to a NEW MOVIE that just came out and tell her that you won tickets to a NEW RELEASE and would like to take her with you. This way, the two of you are alone in a dark theater and you can try some Rico Suave moves on her. If they go good, then cool, it means that she is into touching you in private and just might not be into public affection. If it don't go good, just tell her that you are used to sitting beside a girlfriend, and just got into the moment. Remove hand or arm, then a few more minutes into the movie, repeat the process... After about 3 attempts, just tell her, "Look. I'm not trying to make a move on you, I am just used to having my hand/arm on a girlfriends leg while we watch a movie, I mean nothing by it ok.. Just relax and let it go. I only like you as a friend, nothing more. ok." If she still insists that you reframe from putting your hand/arm on her, then just tell her, "Fine, I didn't know you were such a bitch." (smile) This starts the little flirting shit. Or she will get pissed off and leave, or she will just start an argument with you. It will not be a LOUD argument, it will just have to tonality that she is mad. Arguments tend to have a way of turning into something positive when you are not with friends. She can get mad, and then you can calm her down by complimenting her on something she is wearing or ask her why she said something the other day about this or that... It will make the argument turn around into something positive. I like arguments, it gives me the opportunity to learn something about the girl, be it something that pisses her off so I know not to do/say that again, or I learn something totally unexpected about her... like how she hates it when guys assume she's a bitch, when in fact, she does not want to be seen as a bitch to no one... ever... Wow, I completely got lost in my thoughts here... I'm done.

Page 1 of 1	All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/