I'm fairly new to the forum, and I hope I'm posting this in the right place.
Approaching is most definitely my sticking point. More importantly, I've come to realize the beliefs that get in the way of me simply walking up to an attractive woman, opening my mouth, and saying something.
It's the most difficult thing for me to overcome and I'm reminded of this obstacle every time I'm in an environment with a lot of women around.
This weekend I went to a street festival in a local neighborhood. I didn't expect many people to be there. But it was packed! I was also amazed at how many gorgeous women were there.
I was supposed to meet friends whom I eventually never connected with. So I spent a good amount of time walking around on my own. I'm okay with that. I do it a lot.
But the more time I spent looking around, the lonelier I felt. I felt a great sense of disconnect with everyone around me. I looked out and saw hundreds of people...talking, laughing, flirting. It seemed like there was a barrier around me that I couldn't get through.
I began to feel depressed.
This isn't the first time I've had this feeling either. It seems to be happening a lot lately.
What I realize is that my fear of approaching is built upon two things:
- • A deep-rooted belief that no woman would want me to speak to them.
• A fear that I will make her angry by approaching her
So basically, it comes down to unworthiness and a fear of angering others.
I won't go into all of the reasons why I've developed these beliefs. But when it comes right down to it...these are the two things that get in the way of my approaching.
Even when I do find myself in a conversation with a woman (with anyone really)...I have this feeling that they just want to get away from me..they don't want to be talking to me...they aren't interested.
It's crippling. And I find myself getting really down about it.
I also need to build more friendships with men my own age. That's something that I've always avoided in life for a variety of reasons (again, probably better not to go into that now).
Any feedback is welcome. I'm really just sharing this here so I can get it out of my system. And hopefully, it might resonate with someone else who might benefit from knowing that other people feel this way as well.