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The freeze-up
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=193309		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Sangun [ Mon Oct 12, 2015 5:13 pm ]
Post subject:  The freeze-up
Hello PUA's!

Okay, let's sketch a situation to explain my SP.
Imagine talking to a girl, let's say; In class (University). Everyone else is working at their given assignments some make some sounds, some do not. Six students are grouped around a table like an island.

Small talk is easy, interest can clearly be shown and returned; But what kind of interest?

Another situation:
You meet someone online without a photo; It is only for the heck of it and you can't even be sure if the one you are talking to is a girl. Surely, the conversation had been interesting but gender-neutral; I take the risk and somehow get HER on social media. Turns out it is a girl who lives near you. You start talking more like people who just met, but eventually; There it is; Conversation starts to die out, nothing to talk about and wasn't it too soon to start telling her I do like her for it?

If the point wasn't made, my SP is where does casual conversation end and should I somehow make her aware of the fact I am interested in her?

Now I did try some things. I tried calling which caused the oposite effect. It was trying nontheless.
Now knowing doing that is very creepy, I completely shugged off calling at this stage.

So I kept looking; I tried straight up telling a girl that I find her interesting and if she would be up to meeting in person. If such a girl is someone I've seen in person, they doubt; If I hadn't meet them before, then it will be a complete no.

In any case, I am not the kind of guy who wants to shag any girl; She must have character otherwise it just doesn't to it for me. However, those who I find attractive because of it are difficult to approach with intention. I am not sure why that is, but for some reason I eventually started to back down because I just don't know any way of breaking the news.

I have no trouble making conversation or making friends for that matter. I have no trouble starting conversation with anyone. I used to be very introverted but thanks to my brother I've overcome the bad sides of being introverted.

What do you guys think? I do not mind brutal honesty as long as your feedback is constructive.
I'd appreciate your insights on this and possibly how to overcome this obstacle.
Author:  Style981 [ Mon Oct 12, 2015 8:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The freeze-up
Quote:
where does casual conversation end and should I somehow make her aware of the fact I am interested in her?
I think there's no fixed boundary to this. You could convey sexual interest in the beginning. It works. While sometimes, you start with casual conversation, as in case of opinion openers, and then become sexual as the conversation progresses. It depends on the situation and on what style suits your personality

Generally, in any conversation, the humor, sexual interest and casual conversation go hand in hand with each other. All 3 have to be balanced though, throughout the conversation. If you over do any one of them it can fuck up. e.g

--> Too much funny = You are a joker

--> Too much sexual interest = You are needy

--> Too much casual conversation = You are boring/Nice guy. Welcome to 'friend zone' :lol:
Author:  Sangun [ Mon Oct 12, 2015 9:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The freeze-up
Quote:
Quote:
where does casual conversation end and should I somehow make her aware of the fact I am interested in her?
I think there's no fixed boundary to this. You could convey sexual interest in the beginning. It works. While sometimes, you start with casual conversation, as in case of opinion openers, and then become sexual as the conversation progresses. It depends on the situation and on what style suits your personality

Generally, in any conversation, the humor, sexual interest and casual conversation go hand in hand with each other. All 3 have to be balanced though, throughout the conversation. If you over do any one of them it can fuck up. e.g

--> Too much funny = You are a joker

--> Too much sexual interest = You are needy

--> Too much casual conversation = You are boring/Nice guy. Welcome to 'friend zone' :lol:
Thanks for your input. I do tend to overthink things but the thing is, if I don't think a little then I put myself immediately in the situation you mentioned. The thing about that is I have no clue of when is enough of either of the funnies, displaying sexual interest and casual conversation.

The thing about casual conversation is that it helps maintain contact while as you state, also invites me cleanly over the 'friend zone'. May also be one of the reasons I have no trouble making friends.

After reading your input, what I am really asking is, how can I balance those things either without thinking or with (though I'd prefer with, since that is more in line of my analist personality. If not possible, I'll make due anyhow)

Thanks for more feedback :)
Author:  Style981 [ Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:58 am ]
Post subject:  Re: The freeze-up
Quote:
After reading your input, what I am really asking is, how can I balance those things either without thinking or with
Calibration. The more you experience the more you'll start to do it naturally. Thinking about it won't help much I am afraid.
Good thing is, its a behavioural trait. So you don't need girls to practice this. You can develop this sense by talking to people, in general, whether it be men, women, old people, kids etc. In fact you can start practicing it in texts too (as e.g on this forum) ;)
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