PUA Forum
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

To break up or try to reignite the spark?
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=124205		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Decessum [ Tue Dec 27, 2011 4:53 am ]
Post subject:  To break up or try to reignite the spark?
Hello everyone, I haven't been here much, I used to read a lot of the forums, and actually got myself a girlfriend. Now its 2 years later and I need help. I can't post on the relationships forum, so I'llpost here.
I've been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years now. And, as every new relationship, things at the beginning were being awesome, being flirtatious and having fun and enjoying each other. As time went by, things became more difficult and we started having fights, but nothing we didn't fix up.
So the relationship kept going and going, and now, 30 months later I find myself questioning this relationship.
I don't know if I feel the same for her as I used to do, I care for her, and love her, but I don't know if I do so as much as I used to do so.
I have tried to break up 3 times with her, but we both ended in tears and I couldn't stick to it and in the end got back together. We'd said we'd give it one more shot, and if it didn't work, then she'll accept it.
I know this will hurt us, and will hurt her a lot more, because I know she is in love with me, but I just don't see myself next to her anymore.
I don't know what I want ... if to stick with her, or have a more active sex life or love life. I havent approached a girl in 30 months, nor seen my friends. I dont know how I can do this.
If breaking up is the only option, or if I can still try to feel for her what I felt at the beginning.
What are your thoughts?
Author:  Entourages [ Tue Dec 27, 2011 5:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Are you happy? Do you like being unhappy? Would you tell your friend to stay unhappy cause he doesn't see another option...

I think you know what you have to do, you just need someone to tell you your doing the right thing. For now, and this is my personal opinion. Ask to have a break with the girl, see if you are really over her, go away for a week, its new years soon. Go on vacation, and see if you actually miss her and need her, or if you really are over her. Why waste another day with someone you don't love, when it could be one of those days you find your true love?

Best of luck
-Raphael
Author:  Decessum [ Tue Dec 27, 2011 6:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Are you happy? Do you like being unhappy? Would you tell your friend to stay unhappy cause he doesn't see another option...

I think you know what you have to do, you just need someone to tell you your doing the right thing. For now, and this is my personal opinion. Ask to have a break with the girl, see if you are really over her, go away for a week, its new years soon. Go on vacation, and see if you actually miss her and need her, or if you really are over her. Why waste another day with someone you don't love, when it could be one of those days you find your true love?

Best of luck
-Raphael
Thanks for your response, I appreciate it. I have inquired the fact of taking a break, although she says that a break is another way of saying its over, so basically asking for a break is ending the relationship for good.
I don't want to be with another girl, I just feel I need some time to myself. People say, "Well, thats time for you" but really it isn't, when you see your girlfriend, you spend money on her, etc...
She has said she doesn't NEED me, but that she wants to be with me. I don't want to end up cheating on her because I don't feel good.
I just wish breaking up wasn't so hard, she makes it hard for me.
Author:  Entourages [ Tue Dec 27, 2011 5:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
Dude you look right into her eyes and tell her you need time on yourself, if she wont let you take that than she doesnt care about you like she claims and that you know exactly where you both stand.

So forget about what she wants its about you!
Author:  Decessum [ Sat Dec 31, 2011 8:33 am ]
Post subject: 
I did it. I broke up with her. I feel horrible, and miss her terribly, but I know in my heart it was the best decision both for her and for me, in the long run.
She is also going through a bad phase.
Figures, the one thing I did this for, is because for the first time I was thinking about myself. I always think about others before me, and this was for my own happiness, and even then I find myself worrying about her, that she doesn't suffer.
I want just to be with myself, be alone, spend time with me. How long can one feel like this?
Author:  Entourages [ Mon Jan 02, 2012 2:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I did it. I broke up with her. I feel horrible, and miss her terribly, but I know in my heart it was the best decision both for her and for me, in the long run.
She is also going through a bad phase.
Figures, the one thing I did this for, is because for the first time I was thinking about myself. I always think about others before me, and this was for my own happiness, and even then I find myself worrying about her, that she doesn't suffer.
I want just to be with myself, be alone, spend time with me. How long can one feel like this?
Well first off congratulations on becoming a MAN! Seriously, you need to take care of yourself before others, otherwise how will you be able to help them if your in a shitty state as well. This will hurt, but it will be easier. Just go out, get a new hobby, fill your time up with something. A girlfriend is like an addiction, you are spending loads of time with her, and she makes you happy (dopamine in brain) and now your not getting that "fix" so you need something new. It gets easier, you know this, and so does every other guy. Hopefully you had a good new years, met a couple people, and taking things from there. It's a new year, and a new start for you. Lets take this year out with a bang shall we :P
Page 1 of 1 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/