Hey guys, so here is the story. I'm out of a long term relationship for a couple of weeks now and I'm diving into the game (been at for about a week).
In this week Ive done probably over 20 approaches (day game only, mostly at the mall near my place).
My openings usually go extremely well and my initial negs are usually a smashing success. I am naturally pretty confident so i don't have any problems selling the fun behind the neg.
There are two things that seem trip me up every time. The first one is interest of the group. I keep my body language good and usually only speak to my target over my shoulder negging her occasionally. At a certain point she start taking steps for attention (leaning farther into the circle to face me more directly, speaking up, looking solely at me when she speaks, and other attention getting/seeking behaviour).
At this point Ive negged her once or twice and disarmed the group. Once she is clearly vying for my attention i start to focus on talking to her (this is aprx 5min mark) at this point two problems develope every time.
1. I can never switch the topic off of my opener. This causes the convo to get stale. Even when I try to lead a switch and start talking about other things every one else bleeds back into the reason why Im here (my opener). Because of this the topic gets stale, the interest fades, and I can now longer justify being there so Im forced to eject.
2. I have tried relying solely on my own DHV stories but i think im screwing up here or something. Maybe its the reason why people lean back into the opener convo. I have a very active life, Im a business student, im in the process of starting my own business, i rock climb, snow board, snow shoe, i tell stories about my relationship with my little sister and how i have to look out for her. All of these topics i have stories about where i can casually mention that i do these things so i can DHV spike. Unfortunately none of this works, Im known in my circle of friends for being a good story teller but i find it difficult to sell strangers on them. I dont know if i cant sell the stories to strangers or if strangers just don't care about the topics.
So my questions are:
-Is there a better way to DHV
-Should i be trying to isolate my target, if so how and when.
-what other things should i do at this point
-I try when in convo with the target to keep a ratio of 2-3 positive comments to one neg. Is this the best way?
-in a group should i only be kenoing the target or should it be everyone
-at what point do i start keno during day game.
Over all it feels great and the mood is great for the first 5 min. After that the entertainment slows and i feel as if people start to wonder why Im still hanging out and I have trouble justifying still being in the set. I have tonnes of interesting things to talk about but I cant tell if people don't care or if they think its weird that im going of topic (which is the only justified reason why i approached the group)
Thnx ahead of time for any help
Sincerely Prozak
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