Hi Guys, Here's a routine i though of, lemme know what ya think!
It'd probably work best in a bar, i have tailored it to myself, but if you like, please feel free to modify and use!
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So im talking to a set and if one of them starts smoking, of someone who walks past smokes i say:
Me: "Man i hate Cigarettes! I almost Died because of Cigarettes!!!"
Set/Target: "How!?"
Me: "Well its going back about 3 years ago, i was going out with this girl at the time who was modelling (DHV), and after a long weekend of 2 games of football and a REALLY long Karate course, that i HAD to go on, otherwise i couldnt have gone away with the national team (DHV), but anyway, she turns to me and says that she wants me to go with her to keep her company when she drove to a last minute shoot in Bristol, cos she didnt like driving at night on the motorway! So anyway, we're driving and the directions her father wrote were unreadable, so we end up taking a wrong way and getting totally lost! We're driving down this old road, tree's each side and she's like "Oh i really need a cigarette!" Her excuse was that it supressed her hunger! So she' puts on the lighter in the car, takes it out and drops it, John Candy Style of "Planes Traines and Automobiles!" right on her lap! So she screams, looses control, but manages to miss every tree as we start sliding off the road!
Anyway, we end up going backend 1st over a ditch and shes going hysterical!! Im trying to calm her down (DHV - taking control of the situation), but she wont let me go find help cos she keeps thinking that somethings gonna happen like a sceen from "Wrong Turn" as she put it!
So Since the car was stuck and we couldnt get a signal, i decided to wait till morning!
Eventually, we had help from a passing car, who got someone to come out and pull the car out of the ditch!!! (Blah Blah Blah) But we didnt stay together long after that actually!
target/Set: "Why!?"
Me: "Well if wasnt cos of her driving! Na, Its just beauty is really common these days and thats all she had! I mean you need something more than beauty to relate to, to make things interesting. Know what i mean? (To Target) i mean, you seem really interesting. Dunno what it is about you, but i am drawn you you! I bet if i asked you to name 3 things that would make me wanna get to know you better you could!"
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Climax _________________ "Women are Just as Bad As Men - They're Just Better At Hidding it! So Let's Exploit that!"
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