What to say when she asks what you do for a living:
"So what do you do?" - Her
A. "I'm a traffic light repair man...It's pretty cool, actually. I drive around with a portable machine and I can change the colors on each light. So next time your late for work, give me a call and I'll hook you up!" -You
B. "I pack parachutes for skydivers. You should come check it out...By the way, how much do you trust me?"-You
C. "I'm in a rock band. As a matter of fact, we're looking for drummer and you look like you just might fit the part. I'll go ahead and put you on the list for auditions next week."-You
These gets a lot of positive reactions because they can't tell whether or not you're joking.
Another side note: I've noticed that skydiving is a good conversational piece. People always have a strong opinion on it.
A few I have used:
all must be said in a playful way w/ a smile
"Im a pizza delivery man delivery man"... wait a second, she will probably give you a confused look... "I deliver pizza delivery men to pizza places."
"Im a freelance parallel parker.. (insert city here) gives me a uniform and I stand around and paralell park peoples cars... I get pretty good tips too!" (note: I had a girl believe this the other night, when she introduced me to her friends she said you wont believe where he works).
addition to number 2: the other day I crashed bently, but it doesnt matter cause the guy didnt notice. Although I guess they could sue the city for it, oh well, I dont pay taxes in (insert city here).