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Advice Needed - Flakey Girl
https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=53&t=97513
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Author:  MKC [ Sun Jul 31, 2011 3:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Advice Needed - Flakey Girl

Hey guys,

First time poster, long term reader.

I've only just started actively practicing game and this forum's been great for learning the theory of it.

There's a girl I need some advice with, really not sure how best to approach it. The situation is as follows:

We've been texting a lot all day every day and things were going well, we went out on a date last week and she was really into me. We got a bit drunk that night and we were making out, she said to me at one point that she was feeling hesitant because she knew I'd just come out of a long term relationship and that I wouldn't be wanting another one straight away.

Since then (two weeks ago) we've met up for coffee once and again went well. Problem is she's started to get a bit flaky. We used to txt each other a lot every day, now she will text me back a couple of times then I won't hear from her for a few days, it seems like its fizzling out. Doesn't seem as keen to arrange another date as before.

My dilemma is this: I've got a party I'm arranging on Saturday at a mates place I'm staying at. Should I invite her to it and hope she agrees to come along? I'm confident that if was face to face with her I could build up enough attraction and transition it well. However on the over hand I'm tempted just to call her out on it and ask her why she's holding back.

I could actually see myself in a relationship with her, maybe I should just tell her that, as that is what I feel is putting her off.

It's not the absolute end of the world if it fizzles out, it's just frustrating because I'm not sure where I went wrong so can't really learn from the experience. I've come across confident and non-needy with her the whole time so I can't figure out why she's suddenly flaking.

Any advice would be MUCH appreciated!

Author:  GameIsOn [ Sun Jul 31, 2011 4:27 pm ]
Post subject: 

Haha nothing personal but I love how all the "new" guys are suddenly appearing on the forums.

On topic now

Quote:
We've been texting a lot all day every day and things were going well
This is the first problem. You'll find yourself in the friend zone quickly by being too available.
Quote:
Since then (two weeks ago) we've met up for coffee once and again went well.
Did you close here? If not, this is where you went the wrong way again.
Quote:
Problem is she's started to get a bit flaky. We used to txt each other a lot every day, now she will text me back a couple of times then I won't hear from her for a few days, it seems like its fizzling out. Doesn't seem as keen to arrange another date as before.
This is all the result of simple maths. 1+1 = 2, you're not reading the IoI's/escalating + you're too available = flake
Quote:
My dilemma is this: I've got a party I'm arranging on Saturday at a mates place I'm staying at. Should I invite her to it and hope she agrees to come along?
Tell her that you're doing this and it's gonna be a lot of fun and tell her that she can join. That way she knows that you're already having fun regardless of her company.

Good luck

Author:  MKC [ Sun Jul 31, 2011 4:46 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
We've been texting a lot all day every day and things were going well

This is the first problem. You'll find yourself in the friend zone quickly by being too available.
Yeah I totally see what you mean - that's definitely a mistake.

Quote:
Since then (two weeks ago) we've met up for coffee once and again went well.

Did you close here? If not, this is where you went the wrong way again.
Yeah I did k-close here, same as the first time.

Quote:
Problem is she's started to get a bit flaky. We used to txt each other a lot every day, now she will text me back a couple of times then I won't hear from her for a few days, it seems like its fizzling out. Doesn't seem as keen to arrange another date as before.

This is all the result of simple maths. 1+1 = 2, you're not reading the IoI's/escalating + you're too available = flake
You're right I think making myself too available has caused the problem here.

Quote:
My dilemma is this: I've got a party I'm arranging on Saturday at a mates place I'm staying at. Should I invite her to it and hope she agrees to come along?

Tell her that you're doing this and it's gonna be a lot of fun and tell her that she can join. That way she knows that you're already having fun regardless of her company.
I've just text her that and I'll let you know how I get on, if she doesn't respond or doesn't seem keen I'll just leave the whole thing I think.




Thanks for taking the time to reply man, at least I can start to understand where I've gone wrong so that next time I can play it a bit differently.

Author:  zappo [ Sun Jul 31, 2011 11:02 pm ]
Post subject: 

Im in the exact same boat as we speak . Ive got a party in 2 days . Theirs one specific girl I want there ( sure ive got my back ups already coming)but i want her there !

But shes "shy" and is using the lame excuse of "Work" to get out of it

Ive just left it with " Oh i see the excuse fairy turned up ;) " shes now a mabey but thats not good enough for me. Ive also tried using emotive language to get her to come and simple psychology "Remember all the past partys youve been to and how awesome they were , well this is exactly the same just better , dont be a goober :P "

you will have " fun" you will "enjoy yourself".

If youve had any success with your flake let me know :)

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