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help, wanna make sure i come off as un-needy as possible
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Author:  shtuffy [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 8:06 pm ]
Post subject:  help, wanna make sure i come off as un-needy as possible
been texting this hb for the last week since i met her in club, im doing the usual delay responses, waited couple days after i met her to text and whatnot, really good vibe everythings been going great so just need a little advice on what to do here

She asked me if I will be going out this saturday, I said yes and she asked me where I was going. I told her me and my friends "aren't familiar with the area so I'd let her decide :P" and she said "ok I'll let u know when iv decided :P"

I was texting her yesterday for a while and I left my phone at home when I went training, when I came back I had a text from her from a couple hours previous and at the end of my reply I said "so have you decided for me where I'll be going tomorrow? :P"

She hasn't replied yet and seeing as tomorrow is Saturday if I haven't heard from her will I text her saying something like "so shall I be seeing you out tonight? Or am I going to have to find another really fun (her name) to get drunk with? :P"

What would you guys say here?
Thanks
Shtuffy
Author:  Sweet10 [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 8:41 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'm pretty new to this myself but i'd say txting again would be a DLV. If i have one rule, it's not to txt twice without reply. Personally, i would hold out as long as possible and if you say theres been a good vibe up until now and you've worked ur game, she will txt back. She also might be gaming you to see if you will jump and txt again. Be cool, have faith and when she realises she might miss out on a good time she'll be in touch.
In the case that she doesn't txt before the night out then maybe a cooly worded txt telling her that you did find somewhere so didn't need her help and ended up having a great time might let her know she's missin out! Hope that helps even a little..
Let us know how it goes
Sweet
Author:  GameIsOn [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 8:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
I even suggest leaving her entirely until she texts you. If she doesn't text you before your night out just text her sometime after that telling/showing her what a great time you had. FRAME You're going and have a good time, you're simply giving her a chance to tag along and enjoy the fun you're having
Author:  shtuffy [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 9:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
thanks for the quick replies guys

yeah thats what i was thinking i didnt wanna text twice in a row because its pretty obvious from her fb and whatnot she has a few guys chasing her so im definitely going to make her chase me ha

needless to say i would have followed both of your advice's and just left her until she texted me but that wont be necessary as she did just text me telling me to meet her tomorrow at the club :P

thanks again guys
shtuffy
Author:  GameIsOn [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 9:27 pm ]
Post subject: 
Great to see that it worked out great for you ! Make sure you don't make the same mistake again by giving her control. " I'll let you decide ", you always want to keep the upper hand. Here it seemed like she had control over you whether you were having fun that night or not, you can't let that happen. You're going somewhere and you're going to have a good time regardless of what she's doing. If she behaves she can come along if not then too bad for her !

It wasn't a huge mistake just remind it so you won't need to post for this kind of help again !

Anyways Good Luck !!
Author:  shtuffy [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 9:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
thanks bro ill make sure i keep myself in the dominant position from here out :)

only reason i said that was because i ctually never go out on saturdays and actually dont know what clubs are good to go to on them haha

thought it might have been ok seeing as i was "giving her permission" to decide for me where to go but regardless ill make all my own decisions from here out

thanks again
shtuffy
Author:  Sweet10 [ Fri Jul 29, 2011 9:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree with above, glad it's worked out though. Have faith in the game, if you've laid the groundwork sometimes you just need to give it time and 'let the seed grow'... excuse the horrendous analogy!
Good luck
Author:  shtuffy [ Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:13 am ]
Post subject: 
Quick update and probably a bit more advice needed guys

met her at the club the other night was very late though due to unforseen circumstances so only had a half hour before she had to leave . . anyway she texted me to meet her at the bar and was making out with her within about 30 seconds lol. so pretty much just spent the whole time doing shots and making out. when she had to leave i told her id take her out on a date this week which she seemed excited about, she texted me on her way home saying sorry for only being able to stay for half hour and to have a good night. i said was all good ill take her out during the week, and she said yeah cool :), then i told her what days i was free if any of them worked for her but didnt get a reply so left it for the night (was very drunk so just stayed in club and had fun)

so i was talking to her today on fb but i didnt mention anything about said date just kept the conversation casual with a bit of flirting thrown in, but i think things may have accidently taken a slight frame shift

me: im wanna go out again haha
her: yeah me 2 :) prob wont be out till the weekend tho :( (had already told her id take her out this week, then again alchohol was involved)
me: whys that? your on your holidays ha
her: have no money :( i might go out on thurs tho we'll see :)
me: im throwing a party in my house this week you and your friends are welcome to come will be fun :)
her: ah cool that'll be good :) haha thanks (dont know if this means she plans on coming or is just stating it'll be good)
her: anyway i g2g . . im sure ill be talking to ya :) x (thinks she has upper hand?)
me: you will of course x (i went afc here didnt i)

maybe im just overthinking the whole thing but anyway im thinking ill just not text/fb her (unless she initiates, in which case ill keep it short) until the day before the party im throwing then see if shes coming, if she is great, if not great either way its going to be awesome kinda thing

what would you guys do/say?
thanks again
shtuffy
Author:  GameIsOn [ Mon Aug 01, 2011 11:35 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
met her at the club the other night was very late though due to unforseen circumstances
That's actually great, it wouldn't surprise me that this was one of the reasons she got so excited thus leading to making out straight away.
Quote:
anyway she texted me to meet her at the bar and was making out with her within about 30 seconds lol.
Major IOI and you read it well good job.
Quote:
so pretty much just spent the whole time doing shots and making out. when she had to leave i told her id take her out on a date this week which she seemed excited about, she texted me on her way home saying sorry for only being able to stay for half hour and to have a good night. i said was all good ill take her out during the week, and she said yeah cool , then i told her what days i was free if any of them worked for her but didnt get a reply so left it for the night (was very drunk so just stayed in club and had fun)
I'm not a big fan of saying you're taking her out when alcohol is involved. Chances are she's gonna forget or say yes just because she's in a good mood.
Quote:
so i was talking to her today on fb
Don't be too available, common mistake. You'll find yourself in the friend zone quicker than you can say shit.
Quote:
but i didnt mention anything about said date just kept the conversation casual with a bit of flirting thrown in, but i think things may have accidently taken a slight frame shift
This is where I would have mentioned the date in your position, although I do prefer to call when i'm planning a date but hey whatever works for you.
Quote:
me: whys that? your on your holidays ha
Although you might not have picked this up, but this is actually leaning towards begging her to come.
Quote:
her: have no money i might go out on thurs tho we'll see
Obvious shit test asking you if you're paying for her, good reaction by ignoring it.
Quote:
her: anyway i g2g . . im sure ill be talking to ya x (thinks she has upper hand?)
This is what you want to avoid at any costs. You want to end the conversation on a high note, not her. Of course you can't do anything about it but you should have just left and send nothing back.
Quote:
what would you guys do/say?
Remind her of the party and set the sexual frame "Don't forget to wear something sexy" or something

Good luck !
Author:  shtuffy [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 1:11 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the reply bro will definitely use the guidelines for future reference :)

Right so I'm most likely going to be throwing this party on Wednesday so I'll txt her about it tomorrow evening to see if she's down, however because of her "money" and the fact she said she might go out on Thursday I'm expecting her to say she "can't come but have a good night" sort of reply so I want to use this to my advantage and get her wondering

Should I say something along the lines of "aww that's too bad it's gonna be so fun!! I'll ttyl"? Or just a simple "I will of course :) tty"? Or just not reply at all?

I know it's kind of a stupid q but if I did slightly go afc I want to get myself back into alpha mode in her mind immediately haha

Thanks
Shtuffy
Author:  EzAlex [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 4:13 am ]
Post subject: 
personaly, i would just text her the day today, and ask her what her plans are for tomorow, then if she has other plans, you do not get rejected, because you dint invite her right? so then if she says nothing, and asks you about it, you can say trowing this sick party, your welmcom to come, something along those lines, then if she comes, you can bring her to your bedrroom, during the night and bring it to a hole new level,
btw you have to start acting more alfa male, your saying alot of afc things, with all do respect, texting twice in a row, bad thing to do, not answering her text like her goodbyes or whatever is great to boost ur value, and taking a shit load of time to answer is great
keep us posted
EzAlex
Author:  shtuffy [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:29 am ]
Post subject: 
I know dude it's annoying the hell out of me, in person I'm 100% alpha I have body language, eye contact, physical presence, social proof, confidence and all that stuff locked down

It's just my text game sucks that's why I'll be coming here for alot of advice on mainly that

I'll keep you guys posted
Shtuffy
Author:  GameIsOn [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:46 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I know dude it's annoying the hell out of me, in person I'm 100% alpha I have body language, eye contact, physical presence, social proof, confidence and all that stuff locked down

It's just my text game sucks that's why I'll be coming here for alot of advice on mainly that

I'll keep you guys posted
Shtuffy
Don't do awww too bad. You don't miss her, say something like "Alright your loss" or something that she doesn't notice that you actually wanted her to come. You're not touched by the fact that she can't make it, you don't care.
Author:  shtuffy [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 10:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Would that not come across as offensive or that I'm annoyed she can't make it? (assuming she can't lol) I mean if a girl wrote that to me after I told her I couldn't make it I'd tell her to go fuck herself haha

Would somethin like "sucks to be you :P gotta go prep the place bye" work better or will I just stick with your loss?

Really appreciate your consistent input bro :)
Shtuffy
Author:  Complex188 [ Tue Aug 02, 2011 3:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
youre right. I hope u went with Sucks to be you
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