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| First date after divorce, really need advice, pretty long https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=53&t=150839 |
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| Author: | 123HAMMER3456 [ Sun Nov 18, 2012 5:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | First date after divorce, really need advice, pretty long |
So after 8 years of marriage ending, started dating again. Went on an internet site and got a great response, lot of girls, lots of conversation. Felt really confident online and the girls were giving me their numbers without me even asking for them. So that part seemed good, but definitely need help with my game in-person. So met up with the first girl last night for a drink (She is in her 30's), looking back on it some good, definitely some bad. Please be raw and uncensored with your opinion: The good: Spent about 4 hours at the bar until about midnight(even though she had to work today) Lots of smiling/eye contact She got real flirty when we were talking about food, saying things like "she loves meat." She referred back to it like 3 times She texted me as soon as she got home, I was staying at a hotel..."Hope you found your way back The bad: She asked me if I always lived alone, so I told her I was married and divorced (felt I had to say it). We started talking about old relationships and after I said a stupid thing like, "Now that we're both depressed...." (Wow, that was stupid), but then tried to cover it up with something like, "but now I have never been happier." (Feel free to smack me) She asked me where do I normally go for drinks with girls I met and I really did not have an answer, but managed to work into the conversation that sooo many girls keep on driving my crazy on this internet site and basically stalking me. Then I think I f'd up and told her that she was my first internet date because I am so picky and that normally I see a cute girl and just say hi No kino Definitely some uncomfortable silences, but at least Ifelt some good tension between us When we left, just a hug and kiss on the cheek, did not push for anything. My biggest issue I feel was no kino, I was not negging enough, and I think at times I was not showing enough balls when talking to her . One good thing was at the end when we were getting up away from the table another girl rushed over to the table and asked if she can have the table and started flirting with me right in front of her. So overall what I am looking for is some advice of the next steps. I want to ask her out for next weekend, but want to make sure that I really start building some attraction...Thanks, I appreciate it. |
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| Author: | puaninja [ Mon Nov 19, 2012 7:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First date after divorce, really need advice, pretty lon |
Pretty good self-assessment there. I think there's definitely potential in you and this girl you are seeing. Work on your push/pull stuff. Don't make yourself seem like the clueless divorced guy who just started dating again and has now idea what to expect out of women. If the divorce comes up, just tell her that it was nothing too serious aside from you both realizing you weren't right for each other. Definitely lead on that you are dating other women and you know how to act with women. Tell her that you have a date with another girl tomorrow. Give her the impression that you are not attached to internet dating and that you can find plenty of women in other ways besides online. Maybe tell her that before you were married there was no online dating, and you used to frequent the bar/club scene a lot and date a lot that way. I hope you see where I am going with this. As far as kino, this isn't specific to your situation at this point. It's just general strategy. You definitely need to do kino escalation, and play up the sexaul innuendo with her meat fixation and your eye splooge or whatever. But more important, calibrate. When you make a sexual comment or touch her, look at her and read her reaction and body language. Try to judge if you have gone to far or if she seems receptive to it. Look for indicators of interest. Obviously, if you keep getting ioi's, then keep going with it as far as you can. If you get iod's, then backpedal a little bit and try to figure out where you went wrong and what you need to do next. You seem to have a good grasp of pick up so I think you'll do okay if you keep your head in the game. |
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