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Showing tons of IOIs impossible to set up a date
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Author:  StreetWalker [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 3:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Showing tons of IOIs impossible to set up a date
Hi fellow PUAs and AFCs.

Been making some tremendous steps in the right direction with my game the last month. Have found a lot of help on this forum, but got a situation that I just don't understand. Any input is welcomed!


So there is this girl at work who I number closed a couple of weeks ago. Met her once (3 weeks ago) while in a nightclub. A lot of KINO and IOIs from her side.

After that we have chatted a lot at work and on the phone. When she see me at work she lights up with a big smile - every time. So we have a good chemistry going on.

The thing is, she is impossible to set up a date with. I have done a couple of these: "I'm watching X tonight, you should join" "I'm at X, wan't to grab a cofee" etc. Both over txt and in person.

After that I chilled, thought she wasn't interested. Then she came in to my office and gave me a hug when she was leaving (giving a hug in the office, HUGE IOI imo). Well, I decided to not give up yet. Then tried this (in person) : "So next week, we should hang at my place and watch a movie - when are you free?" She said tueasday, and we agreed on that. Well, she flaked. Her family visited her - I know this is true since I met them and introduced my self when they where visiting her at work.

After that "incident" I was travelling for a week. We kept texting a lot when I was away. When I got back I did the movie invite again - this time her little brother was visiting... So she declined - but told me "thank you for the invitation :)"

After that I thought fuck it - use your energi on the other girls i'm gaming.

So today at work (first time I saw her after her ("thank you for the invitation :) "), she was practicly beggin for attention from me. Opened me several times. When I was on my way out finished for the day - she IOIed the hell out of me - also got a couple of DHV from coworkers while talking to her.


To summarize: She seems really into me - Lot of IOI and KINO - but seems impossible to get her to meet up with me!

Any suggestion what I should do to increase my chances of meeting up with her? I don't want to waste time on her, but I do like a challenge.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 4:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
Are you returning, then leading kino? Then progressing to a sexual frame? both text messaging and in person?
Author:  StreetWalker [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 4:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Are you returning, then leading kino? Then progressing to a sexual frame? both text messaging and in person?
Thank you so much for your reply!

Are you returning, then leading kino: No

Then progressing to a sexual frame: No


Reason for beeing so passive in that regard is that she is fairly new at work, and I have a higher value position than her. Don't want to make her uncomfortable/pressuring her.
Author:  StreetWalker [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 4:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
Oh, wait. The night we met out on the town - I did suggest that we could share a cab to her place at the end of the night.
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 5:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Are you returning, then leading kino? Then progressing to a sexual frame? both text messaging and in person?
Thank you so much for your reply!

Are you returning, then leading kino: No

Then progressing to a sexual frame: No


Reason for beeing so passive in that regard is that she is fairly new at work, and I have a higher value position than her. Don't want to make her uncomfortable/pressuring her.
The trouble is = girls don't fuck passive!

I understand interoffice sexual problems.

Start with your after hours text if you need to!

At the office use innuendo!

If you do not progress sexually, it wont ever progress to sex!
Author:  StreetWalker [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 5:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks!

Was not expecting such direct and simple help.


10 awesome points for you good sir!
Author:  StreetWalker [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 11:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well, what can I say.


Have a date set up with this girl now, and she told me almost straight out that she was interested in me.

Thank you Heywood Jablowme
Author:  Heywood Jablowme [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 12:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
Wreck it!
Author:  StreetWalker [ Tue Oct 16, 2012 11:47 am ]
Post subject: 
Interesting turn of events

Yesterday she opened a txt conversation with me. My txt game was in the zone. She even double texted a couple of times.

We where supposed to meet 1900, but she proposed she could come over to my place at 1300 - since we both had free from work. I agreed to this and she said: "Great, then I don't have to sit around waiting all day to meet you:)"

When I woke up this morning - I have gotten a txt from her that night when I was sleeping. She asked me: "how did it go?" (Had some work thingy )

me: "It went pretty good, but got a couple hilarious things to tell you"
She: "Can't wait! :) (refering to the date today) I'm going to get some breakfast now."


Around 1200 today she sent me a txt: "I'm lying on my couch wrapped around in blankets. Not feeling so good.."

Me: "I'll make you feel good before the day is over"

Her: "Awh, you are so cute! I don't feel like seeing anyone today :( I feel like shit :P"

Me: "Okey. Feel better :)"


I know she got sent home from work last night because she was too sick to work - so from every angle this seem to be a genuine flake.

But the reality is that this is the second time she has flaked on me - just hours before the date - my guts tell me to let her take the initiative in regards to setting up a new date.


What do you guys think? Is she humoring me, or is it just bad luck ?
Author:  JamesWatson31 [ Tue Oct 16, 2012 11:57 am ]
Post subject: 
May or may not be genuine.

Listen to Heywoods advice.

Keep going at her until she breaks!
Author:  StreetWalker [ Tue Oct 16, 2012 12:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
May or may not be genuine.

Listen to Heywoods advice.

Keep going at her until she breaks!
I'll do that - but do I keep gaming her without trying to set up a date - or should I try one last time to take the initiative to set up a date? The alternative is to wait for her to possible suggest a date.
Author:  puaninja [ Tue Oct 16, 2012 2:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yea, just keep ratcheting up the pressure to go on a date with you. Not like begging or pushing really hard, but being persistent. It doesn't take much energy for you to throw her invites, but she on the other hand has to continually think up excuses to back out, which only make her look bad and stupid. You may even want to sort of confront her and ask her why she doesn't like dating guys, or tell her that compared to the other girls you date she is the most problematic person you've ever met. You can't just let her keep stringing you along because then it makes you look really low value. So you want to paint her into a corner, so to speak, and force her to acknowledge why she has been backing out of all these invitations. Eventually she'll either have to tell you the truth, or it will be obvious she's just fucking with you because she's a moron. Hopefully she'll eventually agree to go out with you, but you need to get this sorted out fairly quickly imo.
Author:  StreetWalker [ Tue Oct 16, 2012 2:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Yea, just keep ratcheting up the pressure to go on a date with you. Not like begging or pushing really hard, but being persistent. It doesn't take much energy for you to throw her invites, but she on the other hand has to continually think up excuses to back out, which only make her look bad and stupid. You may even want to sort of confront her and ask her why she doesn't like dating guys, or tell her that compared to the other girls you date she is the most problematic person you've ever met. You can't just let her keep stringing you along because then it makes you look really low value. So you want to paint her into a corner, so to speak, and force her to acknowledge why she has been backing out of all these invitations. Eventually she'll either have to tell you the truth, or it will be obvious she's just fucking with you because she's a moron. Hopefully she'll eventually agree to go out with you, but you need to get this sorted out fairly quickly imo.
Thank you so much for your input.

I actually did exactly what you are saying when I set up the date that was supposed to be today. At the end of last week I ran into her at work in the evening. Chatted a bit. Then confronted her on all the flaking - in a very calm and firm way. I said something like this: Do you want to see me outside of work? Be honest. I don't want you to humor me just because we work together." Her first sentence was "If I hadnt been interested in you I wouldn't stand back here chatting with you, I would have made up an excuse like 'I need to get some work done, see you later'". Well, this confrontation turned into a 2,5 hour talk - had some decent KINO even. And resulted in the date today. She seemed really excited to hang with me as well.


Ok, so I have done this part of your advice. Based on your post - I will keep throwing her semi direct invitations to hang out together.

And did I handle the flake ok? Or should I have punished her in any way?
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