PUA Forum :: Where did I go wrong?

I want you to take a step back and look at your situation with this girl from another perspective. High school is all about value. By having been openly attracted to this girl in the past, you have already given her all the value she needs from you. Her social circle knows it. By turning you down, she showed people that she was desired, had options, and was in control. Now, by playing you, she is gaining even more value. The fact that she can use her sexuality to manipulate men makes her appealing to her peers. It's equivalent to a guy laying a lot of girls. Same concept.

The only way you'll ever be appealing to her, is if you can offer her more value than she already has. Popularity is the currency of high school. Become more popular than she is. How can you do this? Stop chasing this girl, enlarge your social circle, and start showing other women the time of their lives.

Author:	DanHMan [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 9:19 pm ]
Post subject:	Where did I go wrong?
So basically I chatted up a girl a few weeks ago that I use to be LJBF with. She turned me down hard last year. I said we should catch up, and she agreed. Later, she texted me saying to come to her friends house (that I knew) and it went well. She kept hitting me and stuff. She texted me a week later trying to make conversation and then i kind of ignored it. A week after that I texted her with some story. She showed a lot of interest and told me to text her the next day, which I didn't. Later that week I texted her to make plans. She claimed to be busy with work and Thursday she might be free. I told her I was busy but free then and we should chill then and she said I'll let you know. She texted me at 4 on Thursday saying that it doesn't look like she can do anything tonight. We are both in high school. What did I do wrong? Where do I go from?

Author:	doclift [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:43 pm ]
Post subject:
What makes you think that you're no longer in the LJBF zone?

Author:	DanHMan [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 10:47 pm ]
Post subject:
After I got that speech, it was impossible to make plans with her. She'd never text me or anything. But after all that time of 8 months, she wanted to chill and we did. She also has shown a lot more interest by telling me to text her too. When I would end a conversation she recently has said something like "text me tomorrow" or something like that. Not to mention I'm not making the dumb mistakes as before. I'm not telling her how much I miss her. I am teasing her and being funny. She also told me she was sorry for when she stopped talking to me when I got the LJBF speech. I act different then back then. I'm a different person. Is it possible she doesn't see this and she just sees the old me from when we were friends?

Author:	doclift [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 11:22 pm ]
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She didn't LJBF'ed you, she "let's not be anything'ed" you. Friends call each other. Friends text and hang out. Sound familiar? Friends do all the things you're doing with her right now. Brother, you reside in the friend-zone. She enjoys the attention you give her and is using you for emotional support. Stop letting her suck the value out of you and move on. Sometimes, the best way to get a woman is to show her that you are willing to walk away. This is one of those situations. Stop hanging out with her. Stop texting her. Stop calling her. Stop responding. You set the perimeters of your relations to her, not her. At the end of the day, you'll respect yourself more from it and you'll definitely draw the attention of other women (maybe even your original set).

Author:	DanHMan [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 11:32 pm ]
Post subject:
I believe there is truth in what you say. So if I wasn't in the friendzone, what would I be doing with her?

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Author:	doclift [ Thu Apr 05, 2012 11:59 pm ]
Post subject:
You'd be having sex with her.

Author:	DanHMan [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 12:05 am ]
Post subject:
We've onlu chilled once where i was actually knew what I was doing. I doubt too many high school girls bang the first time you chill. Not getting defensive I get your point, I just want a more rational reason.

Author:	doclift [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 1:27 am ]
Post subject:
I'm not trying to be a smatass. As I reread that, I realized that it came off that way, my bad. Let's break this down so that you can learn from the experience. "I doubt too many high school girls bang the first time you chill"....... This is a self-limiting belief. I started practicing the game when I was 16 and had great success. I closed a handful of sets with high school girls on my first dates with them. I'm sure there are many other members here who can attest the same. We dictate our own realities and you are only capable of doing what you believe you can. I want you to take a step back and look at your situation with this girl from another perspective. High school is all about value. By having been openly attracted to this girl in the past, you have already given her all the value she needs from you. Her social circle knows it. By turning you down, she showed people that she was desired, had options, and was in control. Now, by playing you, she is gaining even more value. The fact that she can use her sexuality to manipulate men makes her appealing to her peers. It's equivalent to a guy laying a lot of girls. Same concept. The only way you'll ever be appealing to her, is if you can offer her more value than she already has. Popularity is the currency of high school. Become more popular than she is. How can you do this? Stop chasing this girl, enlarge your social circle, and start showing other women the time of their lives.

Author:	Slip n Slide [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 9:27 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I want you to take a step back and look at your situation with this girl from another perspective. High school is all about value. By having been openly attracted to this girl in the past, you have already given her all the value she needs from you. Her social circle knows it. By turning you down, she showed people that she was desired, had options, and was in control. Now, by playing you, she is gaining even more value. The fact that she can use her sexuality to manipulate men makes her appealing to her peers. It's equivalent to a guy laying a lot of girls. Same concept. The only way you'll ever be appealing to her, is if you can offer her more value than she already has. Popularity is the currency of high school. Become more popular than she is. How can you do this? Stop chasing this girl, enlarge your social circle, and start showing other women the time of their lives. I would like to say that every high school girl kisses the first time they chill with a guy they're attracted to. If he has the balls to try it, that is. Doclift has been on point in this thread. The quoted section is, I think, one of the most high-school-applicable pieces of writing I've ever found on this site. "Popularity is the currency of high school." It's messed up, but it's the truth. If she seems like a reach to you, a girl that a popular guy you know would go for, you probably can't get her. She's playing you, you're just a friend. But I'll leave it at that, since doclift did so well.

Author:	DanHMan [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 12:13 pm ]
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So once your in the friendzone, it's really really hard to get out of? I'm sure it's possible, but it's hard to change first impressions?

Author:	Slip n Slide [ Fri Apr 06, 2012 1:01 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: So once your in the friendzone, it's really really hard to get out of? I'm sure it's possible, but it's hard to change first impressions? Yeah. Its much easier to pursue new girls. Also that will improve your skill, so you have a better chance of success with old options.

Author:	doclift [ Sat Apr 07, 2012 3:57 pm ]
Post subject:
I gave another member some solid advice on the friend-zone in another thread, check it out. ive-got-a-unique-problem-s-vt131649.html?highlight=

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