| PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| How to React to Rejection After Approach or Later https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=86247 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | breednow22 [ Thu Feb 24, 2011 9:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How to React to Rejection After Approach or Later |
It is common theme to see men become visibly upset following a rejection, however mild. They have failed to condition themselves for the dating scene and the inevitability of rejection that accompanies it. Women will become symbols of resentment, anchors of negativity, if every rejection is taken too personally. A dangerous belief will result: interactions with women will turn into battles (a journey of conquest) ending in victory or defeat. The fun and positive excitement of the chase will be replaced with anxiety. A more progressive mindset, one in which both sexes are working together towards a common goal of companionship, will have been abandoned. Rejection greets us at many moments in life: especially with women. Walking away without a fight is a task that no man can accept and fulfill lightly. It is in our nature to protect our pride, but sometimes this instinct does not serve our best interest. A rejection at the bar or a dismissal at the coffee shop sends the fight or flight systems of our brain into full gear. The bruised ego of a man is a hard thing to combat, especially when his emotions stand at ends with his basic logic; however, by harnessing our emotions, we will walk away from rejection unscathed to enjoy someone more deserving of our attention. If you’re lucky it may even serve us in other ways. Take for instance, my recent experience of being stood up on a first date. I had met an attractive woman at a bar. We had made plans for a date on a Monday, but she failed to arrive at the 9:00 P.M. meeting time without any excuse. She was a complete no show. Despite all of my training and my understanding of rejection, I felt hurt. I became angry and resentful. A scornful text message was the perfect remedy for my bruised ego: one that would fully espouse my feelings of resentful anger! The send button was half pressed before my friend wisely snatched the phone away from my grasp. I took a moment to gain perspective. Then the initial text message was replaced: "“I am sure you have a perfectly good excuse for the no show. I hope everything is alright : )”." After the message was sent, a sense of closure precipitated and I soon forgot about the entire experience. Later the next day I received a response. It read: “"I am so sorry for the miscommunication. Something came up at work and I was unable to respond to your calls because of meetings. I hope I can make it up to you by taking you to dinner!"” If I had reacted to my natural instinct of lashing out in defense, I would have never known the truth. I would have never experienced a great date one week later. Instances such as this occur all off the time. Men jump to conclusions and burn bridges, while feeling justified in doing so. They may have missed out on situations like the one I just explained. But even if no chance for an intimate relationship was possible and failure was the actuality, becoming upset is never the correct response. In any situation, the reactions we provide are the ways through which we are perceived and understood by others. Duh! You will lose any respect from those around you by acting like a winey, disappointed child who has failed to get the cookie from the cookie jar. More importantly, you will have lost control of your logical disposition, in exchange for your irrational emotions. Attraction many times rests on a man’s ability to maintain a sense of composure and understanding. Don’'t ruin the mood for those around you and especially do not sacrifice your positive mojo for a more negative mindset. Continue on with your day un-interrupted. And remember, do yourself and every female you meet in the future a favor, —take it like a man! -Ben Reed AKA Breednow www.breednowornever.com Breednow-or-never (Dating Advice for Smart Men) |
|
| Author: | Jits138 [ Thu Feb 24, 2011 10:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
good post... take home the waitress then everyone is happy... including the waitress. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|