@ Boris: as an aside, why would you chose a name that so closely resembles BorisSTD? Can't be a popular name with the dyslexics
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| dont do this ! https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=85161 |
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| Author: | the average joe [ Wed Feb 09, 2011 12:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | dont do this ! |
Hi guys Dont do this ! I suffered with AA for years it was so strong that you even cant imagine how bad i felt about the idea of approaching women... One day i make decision to do something with it, and I decided to hire for job (direct marketing).... as a salesman -my job was offer people credit card for citibank with the hope that i will get used to approaching strangers and deal with rejections.... ..so I bothered every customer passing me by with that "special" credit card, you can imagine that 90% of the people were rejected me, but when it comes to women it was even worse, I wasnt able to sell the card to any women ! only guys were willing to sign up. So this "cure" created even more anxiety and now I am here to ask you for advice you guys, how on earth i can overcame the anxiety ? the fear of rejection is really strong, when I offered the cards people rejected the product, but if would try to offer basicaly myself, i wouldnt be able to handle the rejection... I didnt make any approach during my entire life, so I am scare to death to start now, when I am 32 years old...the likelyhood of rejection si really high, as i understand it, espeacially if you have zero success with the ladies, but I really want to connect to a women in a way, what can I do ? how can i make my approach more natural ? how can I hide the nervousness ? I dont want to to fail with my first approach ... |
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| Author: | zigzag40 [ Wed Feb 09, 2011 1:14 pm ] |
| Post subject: | AA |
Sounds like your AA is really bad. My advice to you would be to join salsa classes if there are any in your area! In a typical salsa lesson you will dance with all the ladies in your group usually around 20secs at a time. Because they will be beginners like you, they will usually be just as nervous. Very quickly you will make new friends. Once you have completed a dozen or so lessons you should then be competent enough to freestyle. Freestyle with the same women that you have learnt with to start off with and then move on to the ones you haven’t. Salsa etiquette is ‘It’s rude to refuse a dance!’ so when you ask a women to dance etiquette is on your side. After dancing for a few months you can transfer the confidence of approaching women in salsa to approaching and then opening sets. It works… believe me!!!!!! |
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| Author: | AFCmack [ Wed Feb 09, 2011 1:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
thats what the problem is your doing your first approach over and over when youve already done it youve been rejected get over it.Go Hard man,Go harder than Hard if you want any thing in life at a level above the norm you need to grab it with your arms your legs and even your balls,throw yourself into it, dont hold back.Thats a cure for anxiety choosing not to listen to it your life is not in danger. If you want to start the easier way ,Go into a shop and ask for some assistance from a hot girl or even buy a pack of gum and try eye contact,find a mall and sit in the food court untill your comfortable, catch the bus and sit next to a girl,chat anonymously on a chat site and try get rejected.mumble hi to yourself while walking past a girl.observe something about a girl you could chat to her about if you could talk to her.get a wing who also has never approached and you can help each other.When you get to it just tell your first set your nervous and wanted to approach if you have to.as said joining salsa is great fun,or try a language club as you get to talk to heaps of women as they all need to practice their english etc... There is nothing to be afraid of you already have the fear? Go Hard! |
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| Author: | BorisSDT [ Thu Feb 10, 2011 4:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
That just sounds like a good way to get even more self-conscious. nobody wants to talk to those sales people trying to give away something nobody wants... |
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| Author: | spyder.z [ Thu Feb 10, 2011 4:57 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I know it's not a complete answer to your problem, but I'd recommend trying the stylelife challenge, I'm currently doing it and so far it's helped me to get over my approach anxiety. |
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| Author: | Keksman [ Thu Feb 10, 2011 5:09 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Boris is correct. Nobody wants those cards, and I'll venture a bet that you are in fact more desirable than the shit you were peddling. You see, most girls are quite nice, so even if they reject you, they'll be gentle (unlike your card victims). For my own perspective, I feel inclined to bludgeon sales reps who approach me, but if an undesirable girl approaches me, I'll be quite nice about my rejection. Women will do the same and generally entertain at least a short conversation. Enough of those should help you over your fear of approaching, as long as you remind yourself that it's not you but your lack of skill/experience. That, you are here to read about and then learn in the field. Don't expect to take girls home at once. Learn to approach, then to hook, then to close (#c, KC, FC in respective order). |
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| Author: | Keksman [ Thu Feb 10, 2011 5:11 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
@ Boris: as an aside, why would you chose a name that so closely resembles BorisSTD? Can't be a popular name with the dyslexics
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| Author: | furiousracer313 [ Fri Feb 11, 2011 12:55 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
You've gotta fail before you succeed. Go approach women knowing you will get rejected until you've built a tolerance to it. Go in there and try to get rejected. Once you build that tolerance, you'll be better off because you wont fear rejection again. |
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