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My First day doing direct
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Author:  See Jay [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:07 am ]
Post subject:  My First day doing direct
Today i traveled around a small town close to my house. I was doing direct game by just going up to random women and saying that they were beautiful or that i liked something they were wearing.

Most of my responses were bad or awkward so i must have had bad body language or been intimidating people.

I approached about 10 Women i kinda lost count after 5 which was my goal for the day.

It was kinda discouraging after i got so many negative responses. I guess i just have to keep going until i don't care.
Author:  Octave [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 6:36 am ]
Post subject: 
Your problem is that your calling them beautiful. They get that all the time, and complementing a stanger on their clothes isnt good. The only way a compliment will do you any good in game is if it is a 100% genuine comment. One you arent expecting a reaction back from. Also youll notice a lot of people will say when you do compliment you never compliment them on their natural beauty. Only on artificial things, and if you do you cant just be like " i really like your shirt" thats clearly bad game. It has to be genuine. Next time you try the direct approach try some other things. Direct doesnt mean suck up to them, it means clearly demonstrate interest.
Author:  Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 3:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Your problem is that your calling them beautiful. They get that all the time, and complementing a stanger on their clothes isnt good. The only way a compliment will do you any good in game is if it is a 100% genuine comment. One you arent expecting a reaction back from. Also youll notice a lot of people will say when you do compliment you never compliment them on their natural beauty. Only on artificial things, and if you do you cant just be like " i really like your shirt" thats clearly bad game. It has to be genuine. Next time you try the direct approach try some other things. Direct doesnt mean suck up to them, it means clearly demonstrate interest.
Don't sweat it

1. Women are NOT expecting to be told they're hot in broad daylight on the street. By going out and doing it, you're already putting yourself in the top 0.1% of men who have real confidence.

2. All people LOVE compliments, regardless of what it's about, as long as it's done genuinely and doesn't feel like the person wants something out of them or is saying a "line."

=> I would say your problem comes down to the mechanics of your approach and the state you're in. If you run in and startle them, or walk up like you're a charity worker or trying to sell them something, they're not going to listen to your opener. Although, if you do startle them a bit, you can just start with "Hey, I didn't mean to startle you, but I just saw you walking by and....etc."

Next time, try doing this:

1. Get yourself a little in-state by just talking with a few people, like making a few jokes with a shop assistant, or chatting 5 minutes on the phone with a friend who always makes you laugh.

2. Always smile as you do your approach and opener. Smiling indicates your not a threat and makes people naturally open up to you.

3. Have confident body language and voice tonality - stand up tall and straight, hold eye contact and speak slowly and clearly.

4. Use a pacing and leading sentence structure in your opener. Pacing and leading is a great way to establish rapport. You start out with a statement that is definitely true and shows an understanding about how they're feeling. Then your next sentence leads them somewhere they might have been initially sceptical about, and they're more likely to accept it because you've grounded the conversation with something that they already agreed with.

My opener structure is

[pre-frame] + [situation] + [compliment] + [action]

so for example

[Hi! I know this is a bit random, but] + + [I think you're really cute so] +

This is my standard opener and I have to say, I very very rarely get a bad response, other than her just walking away.

It's good because you're acknowledging that what you're doing is quite random, but you're saying you were basically compelled to come over because you find her attractive. You're giving her a genuine compliment, and then you continue the interaction, showing that you're interested in finding out about her. You're displaying great confidence, and showing you're a man who isn't afraid to go after something he wants in life when the opportunity presents itself.

Keep up doing the daygame, and let us know how it goes after you try some of this stuff out!
Author:  Lorenzo321 [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 4:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
blondguy, I always love your encouraging posts (and wish I could have sarged with you but im from NYC)...
To add, I would like to tell you, See Jay, that you should not feel discouraged because you got negative reactions. That just means that you need to calibrate so that you do not get those negative reactions. I wanted to point at something that caused me to have negative outcomes when I started to go direct: I would compliment too much to the point that I seemed like a player instead of a genuine guy.

So I have noticed that there is a formula that has helped me tremendously in direct day game, that is, go direct with compliments but then switch it to indirect game so that you get to know her (make her qualify to you), then go direct and close...

When I go direct too much and give too many compliments, I give off the player vibe. That causes flanking. But one thing that I have noticed throughout my sarges is that you do not go wrong by giving compliments or going direct. Somepeople think that you need to NEG or stuff like that, I dont think so. Just be playful and fun while you tease and you will do really good. So Good Luck!!!
Author:  See Jay [ Mon Dec 20, 2010 11:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Don't sweat it

1. Women are NOT expecting to be told they're hot in broad daylight on the street. By going out and doing it, you're already putting yourself in the top 0.1% of men who have real confidence.

2. All people LOVE compliments, regardless of what it's about, as long as it's done genuinely and doesn't feel like the person wants something out of them or is saying a "line."

=> I would say your problem comes down to the mechanics of your approach and the state you're in. If you run in and startle them, or walk up like you're a charity worker or trying to sell them something, they're not going to listen to your opener. Although, if you do startle them a bit, you can just start with "Hey, I didn't mean to startle you, but I just saw you walking by and....etc."

Next time, try doing this:

1. Get yourself a little in-state by just talking with a few people, like making a few jokes with a shop assistant, or chatting 5 minutes on the phone with a friend who always makes you laugh.

2. Always smile as you do your approach and opener. Smiling indicates your not a threat and makes people naturally open up to you.

3. Have confident body language and voice tonality - stand up tall and straight, hold eye contact and speak slowly and clearly.

4. Use a pacing and leading sentence structure in your opener. Pacing and leading is a great way to establish rapport. You start out with a statement that is definitely true and shows an understanding about how they're feeling. Then your next sentence leads them somewhere they might have been initially sceptical about, and they're more likely to accept it because you've grounded the conversation with something that they already agreed with.
Thanks for the encouraging comments Everyone.

I realized after reading Blond guys Comment i really did not smile at people lol. For some reason thats always been hard for me too do.

I kinda felt like i was just going up and saying the line and walking away after they got a nervous look about them. But i definitly did not try to push anymore conversation then the opener.

Yea i think it would definitly help if i used the method Blondguy is talking about. Most of the responses were a face that said thats random.

I guess i don't need to be so hard on myself just going out and being direct is something i used to think you could never ever do lol. But i know i have to keep pushing myself even if i get discourage i have no choice but to do cold approaches when it comes to meeting women right now.
Author:  new2game [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 10:40 am ]
Post subject: 
Was at work today and a freaking GORGEOUS brunnette came thru with curled hair. I didn't want to pass it up, she was with her friend. I knew i couldn't take it too far because I was at work, so I just did it not expecting much in return.

I said "W.O.W, your hair looks amazing like that". Then she and her friend giggled like 10year old school girls. Im guessing this is good? That giggling was kind of.......annoying haha. They came back 5 min later and browsed at some products 2ft away from me. I guessing they were gagging for more but = work environment :(

I guess if you get a bad answer you could always say "oh, I thought you looked confident enough to accept a compliment".

Seriously...is schoolgirl giggling good? (giggling, not laughing). I have to learn to like it haha.
Author:  Riskless1 [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 10:45 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
you're already putting yourself in the top 0.1% of men who have real confidence.
I love day game purely for this reason. Plus I just hate loud clubs.
Author:  Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 12:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Seriously...is schoolgirl giggling good? (giggling, not laughing). I have to learn to like it haha.
Do you really not know the answer to that?

OF COURSE IT IS!

In the cold light of day, most girls are not expecting to get hit on. They have no game. Therefore even when they really like you and you've just brightened up their day with a genuine compliment, they simply do not know what to say and will get shy, embarrassed and may even just walk away. All you have to do is keep the interaction going a bit, ask them a few questions, tell a little story about something that happened to you, find some commonalities, and get a number or go to an insta-date. It's literally that easy. So much easier than nightgame it's really astonishing actually.
Author:  new2game [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 12:05 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Seriously...is schoolgirl giggling good? (giggling, not laughing). I have to learn to like it haha.
Do you really not know the answer to that?

OF COURSE IT IS!

In the cold light of day, most girls are not expecting to get hit on. They have no game. Therefore even when they really like you and you've just brightened up their day with a genuine compliment, they simply do not know what to say and will get shy, embarrassed and may even just walk away. All you have to do is keep the interaction going a bit, ask them a few questions, tell a little story about something that happened to you, find some commonalities, and get a number or go to an insta-date. It's literally that easy. So much easier than nightgame it's really astonishing actually.
Haha cheers mate.
It took me back to a time when you were 8y.o, and if girls giggled at you, it meant something else. haha.
Author:  jazz25 [ Tue Dec 21, 2010 1:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
the problem is your tone of voice and the follow up to your opening. If you make things awkward they will be...

If you continue normally, things will go smoothly
Author:  afcAL [ Wed Dec 22, 2010 4:38 am ]
Post subject: 
I guess you found out that opening is the easiest part of pick up haha.
I don't see anything wrong with opening with a compliment. Follow up is what counts. Remember: you have to carry 90% of the conversation until person opens up.

In other words, imagine a cute, interesting HB8 rolls up to you and complements your watch. Whats your reaction? Are you all up for an engaging conversation or are you caught of guard with your mind blank?
My guess in the later.
Body language and tonality, as said above, are super important. Easy way to find out what you sound like get a small recorder and record your routine. You will get more feedback from that experience than this entire thread!
Al

EDIT: I forgot to give you credit for running day game and approaching direct. Good job!
Author:  See Jay [ Wed Dec 22, 2010 9:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I guess you found out that opening is the easiest part of pick up haha.
I don't see anything wrong with opening with a compliment. Follow up is what counts. Remember: you have to carry 90% of the conversation until person opens up.

In other words, imagine a cute, interesting HB8 rolls up to you and complements your watch. Whats your reaction? Are you all up for an engaging conversation or are you caught of guard with your mind blank?
My guess in the later.
Body language and tonality, as said above, are super important. Easy way to find out what you sound like get a small recorder and record your routine. You will get more feedback from that experience than this entire thread!
Al
Yea its not hard to open at all if you just have that who cares about the outcome attitude.

I 100% agree with the you have to do 90% of the talking until someone opens up. I guess i just thought they didn't want to talk if i had to keep asking questions. Oh well i will work over these insecurities.

I have actually had stuff like that happened with the girl coming up to me and complementing me on something and i was way thrown off. There us also alot of other ioi's that i just came to realize i have been missing. Like a girl made strong eye contact with me and then opens the door for me. I had no clue what to say except thanks lol.

Thanks for the credit though really pushes me to want to go and do more.
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