PUA Forum :: I fail miserably. :(

i'd suggest some visualization and smaller goals. visualize a successful approach and condition your mind to feel feelings of excitement. most of the physiological signs of fear are the same as excitement, it's just a matter of relabeling the feelings within your body. once you've relabeled them, challenge your mind to intensify your feelings of excitement.

personally i'm a firm believer of jumping in feet first, but the other option is to set smaller goals. rather than approach women, get within their proximity for five seconds. do this to ten women. then move up to get in their proximity, get their attention and smile. do this to ten women. then step it up to saying hi and then leaving. do this to ten women. the key is to take on a little bit more each time.

Author:	JTWJ [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 1:42 pm ]
Post subject:	I fail miserably. :(
Guys, my motive is not totally on picking up girls. But to build up my self-confidence and ability to talk to strangers at ease. So I went to a shopping mall near my place just now. I have all the plans in my mind. However I just COULDN'T overcome my AA! Damn i hate myself. I saw many approachable people around be it man or woman but I just didn't do it.

Author:	Sheer Con [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 2:44 pm ]
Post subject:
think of it as jumping into cold water. Sure it's a scary thought to open but after opening, you will start to feel more comfortable in the set. AA will never fully go away but you can master it. Also, remember all the PUA knowledge you have at your disposal. How can you go wrong?

Author:	JTWJ [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 2:52 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: think of it as jumping into cold water. Sure it's a scary thought to open but after opening, you will start to feel more comfortable in the set. AA will never fully go away but you can master it. Also, remember all the PUA knowledge you have at your disposal. How can you go wrong? I know. I'm gonna try again tomorrow! No pain no gain.

Author:	docgordon [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 5:48 pm ]
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Get a wing. Not only can you share knowledge and work routines, but you can also push each other into talking. I tried doing it alone and I found it incredibly difficult.

Author:	CaptRow [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 7:39 pm ]
Post subject:
haha! i did this with my friends last week. every week or so, we go to the mall and get rejected. yes, GET REJECTED! lol thats our plan. next time, go up to a girl and tell her "excuse me miss, i just shit in my pants...can i get ur number?" obviously ur not gonna get her num...but if you can say that line to a complete stranger, then u would have no problem running game. the girl usually gets a good laugh out of it, and you have a funny story to tell all ur mates!! do this for like a couple of hours...ur prolly never gonna see those ppl again! P.S.- yes, i've actually went up to strangers and told them that line.

PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/

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Author:	Lestat [ Mon Mar 09, 2009 8:31 pm ]
Post subject:
First of all, CaptRow; Nice... good principle for getting rejected, but dude! Much props, actually. Personally I'd just go with "My mate's watching and needs cheering up, I need you to reject me completely and make it convincing!" Second of all, don't get hung up on the fact that you didn't do it that time, mate. Just give it a another go and, if it helps, don't plan on running game but just plan on making a new friend, or even just brightening their day.

Author:	jkenpo [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 7:00 am ]
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It is hard at first if your not used to it. Just be social. Start talking to the hired guns everywhere you go, they have to talk to you and its a natural situation to talk. Just try to have fun conversations, and expect to have a few bombs. For me I've found the less I'm attached to the outcome the better I do. Seriously, I just stopped caring that much, and have been doing that much better. Don't give up, you'll get there.

Author:	JTWJ [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 11:05 am ]
Post subject:
Well, finally i managed to talk to a total stranger guy who works in a 7-11. I just pick up some sweet and walk up to him and ask if there's any place around here that sell good pizza and i eject after getting the response. I suppose i still have a lot to do.

Author:	5uave [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 12:05 pm ]
Post subject:
Start small. Go out everyday and just say hi to girls that you see on an everyday basis. After you become comfortable doing this, go on and move to bigger and better interactions!

Author:	JTWJ [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 12:18 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Start small. Go out everyday and just say hi to girls that you see on an everyday basis. After you become comfortable doing this, go on and move to bigger and better interactions! Does talking to guys help? P.S: I'm not gay.

Author:	Lestat [ Tue Mar 10, 2009 2:50 pm ]
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Yes because you need to get the hang of that as well; better able to lead the group and disarm them as obstacles. Better able to increase your social circle. Talking to anyone you don't know helps.

Author:	-Achilles [ Wed Mar 11, 2009 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:
first of all, don't think that because your game is tight you won't have AA.. It's hardwired in every single one of us. so don't expect that because you know what to say, you will be able to say it easily. Approaching girls is shit, it takes guts the first time of the night. And even more the first time ever. But man, you can feel that way for 10 minutos or for 3 or 4 seconds until you approach her, as soon as you say two words you feel better about your self.. by the third set you are all confidence-- It's all worth it, women are worth it.. Just try, one thinks every single person there is watching to see if one fails or succeds.. NO ONE cares that you are doing anything. the only people that will know you approached is the set, and it's not like they will put an add in the newspaper telling every1 how you did it

Author:	Flashpoint24 [ Wed Mar 11, 2009 5:11 pm ]
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I'm pretty much going through the same thing....talking to guys at the beginning is good just to get you warmed up and in a talkative mood. I went on a similar solo mission at the mall...I first talked to 2 hired guns because they had to talk to me, it was as simple as asking which article of clothing they thought looked better on me...and then I tried to take that into small talk. Then I forced myself to approach fellow shoppers with the same question....then finally started feeling good so I opened up people anywhere.....my opener was an opinion one..."Hey can I ask you guys something real quick?? Do you think I'd look better with, or without a mustache?" I was shaving it off that week so thought I'd give it a go. If you're still having mad AA try this... use a functional opener...example..."Do you have the time?"....its a low risk opener and common to ask anyways.... to help you transition..try adding "oh man I"m late!" (can be used as FTC)...or "Oh good I still have time."........this is also fairly common and baits them into asking "for what?"...then you're into small talk!...if they don't take the bait..then you just seem like you needed the time...

Author:	Mr. Natural [ Wed Mar 11, 2009 10:36 pm ]
Post subject:
i'd suggest some visualization and smaller goals. visualize a successful approach and condition your mind to feel feelings of excitement. most of the physiological signs of fear are the same as excitement, it's just a matter of relabeling the feelings within your body. once you've relabeled them, challenge your mind to intensify your feelings of excitement. personally i'm a firm believer of jumping in feet first, but the other option is to set smaller goals. rather than approach women, get within their proximity for five seconds. do this to ten women. then move up to get in their proximity, get their attention and smile. do this to ten women. then step it up to saying hi and then leaving. do this to ten women. the key is to take on a little bit more each time.

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Author:	JTWJ [ Thu Mar 12, 2009 9:52 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: i'd suggest some visualization and smaller goals. visualize a successful approach and condition your mind to feel feelings of excitement. most of the physiological signs of fear are the same as excitement, it's just a matter of relabeling the feelings within your body. once you've relabeled them, challenge your mind to intensify your feelings of excitement. personally i'm a firm believer of jumping in feet first, but the other option is to set smaller goals. rather than approach women, get within their proximity for five seconds. do this to ten women. then move up to get in their proximity, get their attention and smile. do this to ten women. then step it up to saying hi and then leaving. do this to ten women. the key is to take on a little bit more each time. Good advice. I will try that sometime soon.