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| I lose my bearings and my speech goes down the drain.. https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=23117 |
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| Author: | Brainz [ Mon Jun 09, 2008 3:38 am ] |
| Post subject: | I lose my bearings and my speech goes down the drain.. |
My problem isn't that I can't get myself to approach because of approach anxiety. My problem is that I can't ignore my AA. It totally screws up my game. Check it out: I approach a set, and I have so much AA that all I can think about and all I can feel is my anxiety. It's like my brain totally ignores what I should be doing! My solution? I tried being suuuuuuuper calm before going out. I even meditated. I was calm. I was zen! I was so calm that I didn't even care about approaching anymore; I felt like being lazy by the river and fishing! I made about three approaches. They all sucked worst then when I had AA, because instead of being energetic, I was lazy and boring. I can't seem to make the best of myself shine past my anxiety. Any tips? What should I do?? |
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| Author: | zzzasdfSDFAG [ Mon Jun 09, 2008 8:55 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yo whats up man. Don't fret the AA. You can definitely get past that for sure. I still get it as well and as someone still struggling to get into the game, I have noticed that I get AA specifically when I am in a place I don't know as well and if I am there with few people. I have determined that my biggest fear comes when I don't have a fall back. Almost look at it like a battle. You want to jump in behind enemy lines, but if you don't feel 110% confident enough in your ability then you are going to be nervous and that plays on your fear until you screw up. The only way to overcome AA all of the time, is to feel that you can overcome any obstacle that comes your way, basically to have great game, and to know how to work every situation. AA is just a by-product of those who don't feel this way, especially if you don't have a good out, to fall back on. I think it helps if you go out with a big group and then just leave that group for a little while to go sarge and then return after you're done. My advice is your choice if you want to take it. I am still learning myself. Guud |
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| Author: | Brainz [ Tue Jun 10, 2008 3:34 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks Guud! That's not such a bad idea! I feel specially anxious when I go out specifically to sarge with a wingman, but when I'm with my every-day buddies it feels more natural and relaxing! .. if only I could get my 'regular' pals in on the game! |
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| Author: | OctavianusPUA [ Thu Jun 12, 2008 2:38 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Don't focus so much on trying to will your anxiety away. You are supposed to excited. Approaching women is fun and exciting. If you felt indifferently about it, then why would you be interested in doing it? Try doing what Leonidas did in the 300 with his inner monologue. He talked about how he didn't fell "fear, just a heightened awareness of things." You keep placing your excitement and enthusiasm into negative terms. Next time you are about to approach a set, let that feeling of excitement and anticipation wash over you. Enjoy it! Your body is telling you to approach, just like it tells you to eat and go to sleep. Stop resisting these urges, and your anxiety will start to go away. |
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| Author: | Brainz [ Thu Jun 12, 2008 4:00 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks Octavianus! I'll try that! |
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| Author: | afc08 [ Thu Jun 12, 2008 5:27 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
What worked for me was pretty simple. I consciously make a point of talking with EVERY stranger I come in contact with...the ugly lady working at the convenience store, the people next to me on the bus, the hipsters protesting meat...anyone and everyone. The point is to become social all the time, with all sorts of people. Then, when you see any hotties, it's just your natural tendency to approach and start talking. As an added bonus, you'll be dripping with confidence, which is a big element of attraction. |
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| Author: | AmadeusCho [ Wed Jun 18, 2008 9:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I used to have this problem too. But then I realized I was thinking too much and focusing too much on myself. I started to accept that the AA will probably always be there a a little bit even if I'm feeling at my most confident. What I do is channel that energy and focus more on my mood. Smile and just try to have fun. This is supposed to be fun for her and for you. Taking that energy from the AA and focusing on having fun has made perform better. |
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