i'm a pretty postive and optimistic person. when i dropped my cell phone and cracked the touch-screen front, i decided i'd do my best to turn it around and use that as a topic of conversation, as when people see the broken glass, they tend to ask what happened.

because of this, i figured i might as well come up with a good story and work to use it as an opener. within the past two months, it has become my favorite opener and it actually makes me loathe to get a replacement phone.

---
me: hey, how's your day going?

girl: pretty good, how about yours?

me: ahh, it's been ok, but look at what i did to my phone!

girl: omg, what happened?

me: so earlier today during my morning run (letting her know i work out), i saw this lady walking her dogs on the sidewalk. one of her dogs got away from her and started running down the street. i naturally started to chase after the dog to help, and ended up running all over the place (DHV). after a few minutes of chasing, the dog was nearing a really busy intersection, so i dove and grabbed the leash in a last-minute attempt before something serious happened. when i landed, i hit the asphalt really hard...

...and then about an hour later, i dropped my phone and cracked the screen.
---

at which point it usually takes the girl a few seconds to process what i just said, and then they laugh.


easy in from there, and super easy to use when waiting in line at a cafe, etc.

Then when she doesn't get it, and doesn't realize the subtle humor of saying it happened an hour later, you are put in the awkward situation of having to explain why what you said was funny, otherwise she just continues to stand there staring at you blankly.

If you happen to run into girls that are so dim-witted, better eject anyway. That might just be me, but women that are downright dumb are incredibly unattractive, regardless of their looks.