| PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| Frustrated about daygame/cold hard approaching https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=147470 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | Snakebite [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 9:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Frustrated about daygame/cold hard approaching |
I apologise that this is a long post, and appreciate if you read through all of it. I've been trying to improve my conversational skills and approaching, with people in general, trying to get better at making friendships and improving my dating life. I am currently a uni student living at home, so being able to approach people during the day would be a great skill that would be relevant to my daily social life.. as I don't go out at night. I came into the game because I've never had a girlfriend, or a kiss I've been shy and do whatever I can to improve the situation with girls, and ideally find a woman who loves me for who I am [preferably a girl who is Christian and shares the same beliefs as me]. Therefore PUA and dating advice has seemed to be the only way to solving this issue, but not to get women in bed. I've seen how effective daygame can be and how people have said it has spill-over effects, such as improved confidence in other social situations. It's just that I'm lacking a real motivation to do it here are the reasons why: -I am 19. This means that girls younger than me [e.g. 16-18] will not be present during the day or on weekends where I will not be around except young uni students, and realistically I can't approach women, that are older than 23 [as the age gap will be too far otherwise, also the fact that I can pass off as a 16 year old doesn't help either.] -I am a Christian and want a Christian relationship [no fornication]. If I go out into the street for daygame, at least 70% of the girls [this is a rough estimate] will not be compatible with my Christian values and attitudes. Therefore, realistically I can only use daygame for the improved knowledge and experience of dating, and using this to spill over to the girls of my religion who I can only contact via facebook, txt or by Christian socials which only happen a few times [between about 2 and 8] a year. -I'm also concerned about social skills with meeting new people. Uni has just begun, and I would like to concentrate on building friendships with new people. However thinking about daygame etc. has not made me concentrate on making male friends, or meeting groups of people. -I would like to meetup with guys that do daygame in the areas that I live, it would give me more motivation to have a guy supporting me through daygame during the day. -I am making pathetic/weak efforts at daygame and haven't given/received any girls' numbers. I haven't gone out into the town specifically to do daygame, I've just happened to try stuff whenever I was in town for some reason. I've just tried a bit of talking to employees in shops initially [some small talk, some more personal stuff], a few situational openers/compliments to girls in the town, but no real results, just thoughts of what potentially I could achieve. -I have shared my interest in the game and PUA etc. with almost nobody, and I haven't told my parents about daygame or the ideas that I may go and approach strangers in the street and converse with them. I don't talk to my brother about picking up women, or about even the difficult topic of girls, and I feel that my parents will think that I am being needy/very odd if I tell them about the issue of daygame. So the questions are... do I try official daygame techniques on girls to build confidence and attraction with the opposite sex, but by making a serious effort to do so, and sacrificing time and effort. Do I wait until I am older? Do I not go for daygame, which is on the opposite end of the scale to my comfort zone, and approach a bigger selection of people [i.e. guys as well] to simply be able to make friends from cold approaching [i've been looking to try and improve social and friend-building skills with new people and I bought Joshua Uebergang's "Big Talk" training course, and it strongly advises cold approaching strangers, but it isn't specifically for dating/pick up at all]. Any responses will be greatly appreciated. |
|
| Author: | AmazingArt [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 9:40 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Approaching girls just for the sake of getting experience will not got you much. Because it defeats the whole purpose. The purpose of PUA is to make a guy attractive from unattractive. Attractive refers to a guy who is himself. Meaning he does what he wants at the time that he wants whatever he wants. It's a man who is not afraid to put his self out there and let me take him for who he is. In simple words it means making oneself vulnerable or putting yourself out there. You mentioned that you were shy. Shyness means you don't express yourself the way you want. You many be talking to a girl and feel like kissing her but you feel frozen up because you are afraid to make the move. Your afraid to make the move because of the way your mind works. It tells you that your not ready for that or makes you think of the worst consequences if you try to kiss her. The way to improve your skills with woman is much bigger than just woman. It's to change your whole ideology in life. You have to start doing exactly what you want and making yourself vulnerable. For ex: a girl asks you how many girlfriends you had and you start thinking "if I tell her I am a virgin she'll lose all the attraction for me" this is wrong instead you should tell her your a virgin and put your real self out there instead of creating a fake you. At first this will hurt a lot. You will feel embarrassed beyond anything. At times you will feel your whole life is crappy, this is called the pain period. It happens under any major transformation. But soon enough you will start to do thing that you want to do you will start being yourself. You will start to become comfortable with yourself, with whom you are. You will start making lots of friends and lots of girls will find you attractive. In short make yourself vulnerable by expressing yourself. The age of girls doesn't really matter. So from now on try making yourself vulnerable stop trying to be safe and make things more wild. If you disagree with someone say it out. If you feel your not living the life the way you want it, change it. If the girl your dating is not treating you with respect leave her. I am warning you again there will be resistance but if you pass it the rewards will be immense. Good luck. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|