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stuck. with an AFC issue
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Author:  eamanny [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 2:06 am ]
Post subject:  stuck. with an AFC issue
okay i have no problem going up to girls and just saying hi or whats up. but when i go up to them and try an opener i start to tense up and usually start stuttering or make a fool of myself. any advice??
Author:  The Mountain [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 2:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: stuck. with an AFC issue
Quote:
okay i have no problem going up to girls and just saying hi or whats up. but when i go up to them and try an opener i start to tense up and usually start stuttering or make a fool of myself. any advice??
only advise i can give, dont care what they say. Dont take them seriously at all.

Even when you get rejecten 10 times in a row you wont mind and cause you dont mind you will stay loose and fun.
Author:  SlamBoy [ Sun Aug 19, 2012 9:43 am ]
Post subject: 
That is the problem with pre-packaged openers. You do not feel congruent with them and so when you say them, you don't feel confident and women easily pick up on that emotional vibe.

Starting with "hi", "hey, whats up" is a nice way to start to beat your Approach Anxiety. Sometimes I just say Hi and create an awkward silence on purpose so i can desensitize myself to the act of rejection. Do not get affected by rejection, take it all in and laugh at it.

A better way of approaching is to just ditch the pre-written openers and go one up from "hey". Comment about her dancing, looks, background, why she is happy/sad. Say anything you find interesting even if it seems totally random. Going up to a girl and saying the lyrics of a popular song will get her attention and laughter a lot faster than saying "hi".


Goodluck. Practice is key, what is best to say will come naturally overtime.
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