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Getting into talkative mode quickly
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Author:  chamuyero [ Sat Jul 07, 2012 10:19 am ]
Post subject:  Getting into talkative mode quickly
Hi guys!

I am new to the art of PU and I was wondering if you have tips regarding how to quickly get into talkative mode and have a higher level of energy as the set you are trying to open.

I normally go to clubs and bars alone and my policy is 0% alcohol. Usually I need to talk to 3 to 5 girls at the beginning to get into talkative mode and also raise my energy levels (be in a "happy" mood). These initial contacts usually don't work out because I am blocked and/or not relaxed which makes whatever opener or story I use not sound natural. Once I go through these failed attempts at the beginning I get into talkative mode and my success rate increases.

But blowing 3 to 5 opportunities at the beginning just to get into the right mood is a complete waste. Also if I see a HB in places such a library or a coffee shops this strategy is not applicable because the opportunity window is smaller and there aren't other girls to "practice" with around.

I guess it all comes with time and lots of practice, but my question is if you guys have any tips to quickly get into a good mood/talkative mode, specially if you are alone and not drinking any alcohol.


Thank you in advance!


Cheers,
Chamuyero
Author:  mexicanmagic [ Sat Jul 07, 2012 6:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
I never drink when I go out. I actually don't drink at all and I'm 28. The way I get myself in a talkative mood let it be day or night, I talk to everyone! You're at a coffee shop, library, or mall talk to whoever. Make small talk. Another strategy I use is I will call one of my girls. It helps the juices flow ;)

Now night clubs and bars. I have much experience and I tell the new guys I go out with the same thing, talk to guys! Social proof will pay off in the end. Show up a little early, talk to bouncers, and bartenders. Idk how many times I go out and by the middle to end of the night I'm in set and random people I opened in the beginning of the night come back around and slap me high fives other introduce me to new people. In the night club scene, I'm not very important, but you would never guess that when I'm out.


Hope that helps.
Author:  clearspeak [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:02 am ]
Post subject: 
Easy solution - Go somewhere else first and get the 3-5 openings out of the way there. Like how batters warm up in the batters circle before they get to the plate.
Author:  blitzinger987 [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 2:22 am ]
Post subject: 
You're smart with the no alcohol policy. I learned this early on although I usually feel like it helps (me at least) to have something in my hand so I'll order a cheap beer. I read another post of an opener someone uses like "I get paid next week so it looks like you're buying".

It usually takes me a while to get started so I find a 2-3 set that has no one I wish to go home with and I make small talk with them. If you're lucky, they have hotter friends nearby they'll introduce you to. If not, you're at least able to get into the talkative mode and its a nice self boost to confidence. My opener is the classic "I need a girls opinion on something. A friend and I are having a debate and I'd like to get your thoughts on it." Usually they say "Ok" or "sure" or some BS along those lines and I say "Would you date a guy if he was still friends with his ex?" This almost always starts a fire up in them and they jump to (and I am quoting this from several girls' direct response) "Hell No". Then you just go from there and keep the convo going.

Usually I can keep them occupied with that part for a while until I get them into a casual/comfort area and then proceed with "Ok well would you be alright if he had pictures of her around?". Usually this is where it gets fun and they ask "what kind of pictures?" and I say "What kind would you leave a guy you were dated?" and they'll laugh and say something along the lines of "depends on the guy, sometimes I'll give sexy pictures" and I'll neg with "wow, ok, too much. I'm thinking just usual pics of them at parties or at a ball park or something"
Author:  chamuyero [ Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the suggestions guys! I will put them into practice immediately ;-)
Author:  sooc [ Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:04 am ]
Post subject: 
just start during the day and get yourself pumped. Listening to music is good
Author:  Chiasmata [ Tue Jul 10, 2012 12:49 am ]
Post subject: 
Don't know how effective this is, but it worked pretty well for me when I went from being a fairly shy high school graduate to the college freshman everyone seemed to know. I also use this as a strategy to my staff who are supposed to be talkative and friendly to our patrons; Get it through your head that the people you're about to talk to will be more than happy to have you spark up a conversation with them. If my employees make the arguement "But I'm shy" I just tell them that the other person doesn't know that, so pretend that you're already friends with them.
Author:  ERock10 [ Tue Jul 10, 2012 4:04 am ]
Post subject: 
If you do happen upon a girl that catches your eye without preparing yourself as you usually do, just try not to overthink things. If you get in your own head about it, then you'll have failed before you even attempt anything. For me, the sooner I approach and try to take things as naturally as possible, the less I think about it and the better I do.
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