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My first approach — Ever
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Author:  Scryed [ Thu Jan 05, 2012 2:25 pm ]
Post subject:  My first approach — Ever
Just found out this forum, and sorry if I didn't introduce myself at the introduction session. No matter, I'm going to dedicate myself to this lifestyle after reading 'The Game'. Heck, I even bought new clothes today. :D

So I was at the mall earlier buying and trying some stuff so I can start turning myself to a better person and start gaming. Wearing neat and good looking clothes is not a bad choice, right? I am a 100% introvert which, in this type of art is somewhat a no-no.

After those activities which I have mentioned above, I went to Starbucks for a coffee. Then I saw this pretty girl; let me say, an above average beauty; over the counter taking orders.

When it was my turn to order my coffee, the conversation went like this:

Girl: Hello sir, what do you like for today?
Me: Hi, I was thinking which coffee is good. If I may ask, what can you recommend for me? :D
Girl: Oh, okay first, would you like it cold or hot?
Me: I like it with whipped cream on top, cold.
Girl: Okay, why don't you try our Dark Mocha Frappuccino? It's the best. :)
Me: Hmm, would you recommend me another one?
Girl: Yes, sir we also have Caramel Frappuccino, it's a good one too. So, would that be a Dark Mocha? (She asked that because I was staring at the Dark Mocha right at that moment.)
Me: Okay...
Girl: Grea—
Me: I'll take the Green Tea
Girl: Hahaha! (She was bursting out laughing, loud. In fact, we both did.) Oh sir, take the Dark Mocha instead, please?
Me: Sure thing. *smiling*

I was just thinking of negging the target after her statement at the end, but I can't do so due to the lack of time thinking what neg should I say, many customers were waiting and we spent like minutes for this conversation. My problems are these:

-Have I done the right thing?
-How can I approach the target with scenarios like this? i.e. The target works in a restaurant, a clothes boutique or a shop and too busy to entertain customers
-When is the right time to transition to the next stage?

That was really my first time approaching a woman, let alone it was a stranger. Maybe I should go out more rather than staying at my house doing fortune-telling for myself, lol.

So what do you guys think?

Note: Sorry about my grammar, I'm from the east and English is not my native language. Thank you. :)
Author:  Beetle [ Thu Jan 05, 2012 9:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
It wasn't really an approach, since you went there to buy a coffee, not to close a number. But it was funny. Such conversations with strangers will help you overcome AA.

By the way, don't neg when there is no need for it. In this case, it would've backfired badly.
Author:  Storm3X [ Thu Jan 05, 2012 11:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree with Beetle on this one. Don't neg if there is no need for it. Mystery explains it in his book "The Mystery Method".

Even though this was not a real approach. Conversations like these will give you a really good training and calibration to start off with.

I wish you the best in the future! :)
Author:  Marc [ Fri Jan 06, 2012 1:43 am ]
Post subject: 
Great Job Man !! You've done good. you could create a slight humor for her out of thin air - kudos to you.

Stay away from Negs for now. Ppl at these stores meet a lot of rude customers and girls get hit on a lot in the wrong way.

For now, Do what you are doing - start a conversation at the stores and try to create humor every time. Be PRESENT in the situation/environment and be observant -

When girls like you, they would give you enough material/topics to catch on and carry on the conversation.

Do this a few times and then let us know how things go.

Good Luck,
Marc
Author:  Scryed [ Fri Jan 06, 2012 4:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks to everyone who replied. :D

Much appreciated your help guys, I understand now so this will be my special project for the next day:

- Go to the mall, have a nice clean conversation with someone at the stores and be humorous.

- No negs SPAM.

- SMILE

Any tips and advise regarding creating a humor? I am not spontaneous so being creative in a fraction of a second could be difficult. :?
Author:  Dusty-Page [ Fri Jan 06, 2012 5:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
Even though it wasn't really an approach,i feel that was one GIANT LEAP for you towards becoming a PUA. Situations like that is perfect for you to start getting rid of your AA and build up your confidence for when you do approach. Lol you're starting to get out off your 'introvert-bubble' all because of pick-up! (and then some people has the nerve to say PUA's are shit). As for you negging! Only neg when its needed,when a girl is too full of herself and bitchy. Im glad you didnt neg that girl,the neg couldve backfired and your confidence wouldve tooked a huge knock,seeing your relatively new to pick-up.. My advice for gaming those girls that work the registers or even waitresses in general :
-go back when the shop is quiet (like for instance Starbucks is quieter after the lunch rush) giving you more time to game her.
-dont go there everyday,looking all needy and stalkish.
-dont hit on her or anything, distance yourself from the regular. (those girls get compliments and insults on a daily basis).
-talk to her like a buddy. (building comfort)
-eye-contact and body language is key (seeing your time is limited).
-after shes real comfortable with you,ask her straight up when she gets off? (make it look like it doesnt really matter if she says yes or no,you'll still be going)
lol thats just me!


Anyway congrats on breaking the ice,and goodluck with your future targets,happy hunting soldier!
Author:  chill46 [ Fri Jan 06, 2012 10:34 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: My first approach — Ever
Quote:
Just found out this forum, and sorry if I didn't introduce myself at the introduction session. No matter, I'm going to dedicate myself to this lifestyle after reading 'The Game'. Heck, I even bought new clothes today. :D

So I was at the mall earlier buying and trying some stuff so I can start turning myself to a better person and start gaming. Wearing neat and good looking clothes is not a bad choice, right? I am a 100% introvert which, in this type of art is somewhat a no-no.

After those activities which I have mentioned above, I went to Starbucks for a coffee. Then I saw this pretty girl; let me say, an above average beauty; over the counter taking orders.

When it was my turn to order my coffee, the conversation went like this:

Girl: Hello sir, what do you like for today?
Me: Hi, I was thinking which coffee is good. If I may ask, what can you recommend for me? :D
Girl: Oh, okay first, would you like it cold or hot?
Me: I like it with whipped cream on top, cold.
Girl: Okay, why don't you try our Dark Mocha Frappuccino? It's the best. :)
Me: Hmm, would you recommend me another one?
Girl: Yes, sir we also have Caramel Frappuccino, it's a good one too. So, would that be a Dark Mocha? (She asked that because I was staring at the Dark Mocha right at that moment.)
Me: Okay...
Girl: Grea—
Me: I'll take the Green Tea
Girl: Hahaha! (She was bursting out laughing, loud. In fact, we both did.) Oh sir, take the Dark Mocha instead, please?
Me: Sure thing. *smiling*

I was just thinking of negging the target after her statement at the end, but I can't do so due to the lack of time thinking what neg should I say, many customers were waiting and we spent like minutes for this conversation. My problems are these:

-Have I done the right thing?
-How can I approach the target with scenarios like this? i.e. The target works in a restaurant, a clothes boutique or a shop and too busy to entertain customers
-When is the right time to transition to the next stage?

That was really my first time approaching a woman, let alone it was a stranger. Maybe I should go out more rather than staying at my house doing fortune-telling for myself, lol.

So what do you guys think?

Note: Sorry about my grammar, I'm from the east and English is not my native language. Thank you. :)
To start Yes you did the right thing. The only wrong thing to do in this game is failure to approach. Every approach you do will gain you expierence in the real world. The only way to learn this game is through actively learning it from real world expeirence.

The first thing that you realize that you will have to get over is your approach anxiety. When i first started learning game, I did this exercise. I took 100$ in all 20 dollar bills and i gave it to a friend that i trusted. I told him "everytime that i approach a girl, you have to give me 20$ dollars back, but if I dont approach any girls you get to keep the money" regardless of how the approach went, you get the money back as long as you approach.

When i did this exercise the gameplan was to
1. open the target
2. give her a compliment
3. eject from the set

this way the outcome of the is already predetermined- so you are learning to not put too much pressure on the outcome of the sitution( this is HUGE). All puas get rejected anyone who says otherwise is a liar, the only difference betwen the guys who succeed and the guys who fail is how they look at it. The guy who succeeds at the game does not let a single setback stop him, he keeps on going. this game requires persistance.

This exercise instilled the mentality that the only way you can lose is if you fail to approach the girl. From my experience its best to apply learning in small pieces and that 3 is a magic number. focus on improving 3 things about your game at a time. for this exercise i focused on
1. Smile
2. Eye contact ( when you approach look at the girl directly in her eyes and do not look away)
3. voice tonality

You can repeat this exercise as much as needed until you feel comfortable doing it. you dont need to worry about mid game and number closing if you can approach the girl. this exercise is about building a foundation for your skill set. once you are comfortable approaching, work on your midgame, number closing, etc.

For mid game i usually transition with a assumption about the girl for example: ill say " something tells me that you are a creative person", but any question that you would ask a girl can be turned into a statement assumption. Like where are you from? can be turned to " you look like you are from Japan" the thing about the assumptions is that you dont have to be right
Author:  Scryed [ Sat Jan 07, 2012 4:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Thank you so much Chill and Dusty. :)

So, there I'm going to add those things that you told me to the list. So for a week or two I'm just going to slow down, stop worrying about mid-game and closing for a while and focus on what's needed. So this will be it:

-Approach
-Smile
-Eye contacts
-Body language
-Talk to them like a buddy
-No negs
Author:  Decessum [ Sat Jan 07, 2012 9:49 am ]
Post subject: 
Something that also helps is just talking to everyone really ...
That means, guys as well... just open up with them about something .. the point is to get you comfortable talking with strangers.
Strike up a small conversation with a stranger somewhere, just remember to respect their time, most people (Unless they're not) have somewhere to be at a certain time, unless they're just walking around a mall.
Just talk to everybody, build conversation skills overall... and please have some culture ... be smarter than the rest, this really turns on girls.
One time I met a girl, and when it was night I showed her how to find several constellations on the sky, and she was very surprised, obviously no one had shown her that.
Being smart is good : )
Author:  gabi4play [ Sat Jan 07, 2012 11:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: My first approach — Ever
Quote:
Just found out this forum, and sorry if I didn't introduce myself at the introduction session. No matter, I'm going to dedicate myself to this lifestyle after reading 'The Game'. Heck, I even bought new clothes today. :D

So I was at the mall earlier buying and trying some stuff so I can start turning myself to a better person and start gaming. Wearing neat and good looking clothes is not a bad choice, right? I am a 100% introvert which, in this type of art is somewhat a no-no.

After those activities which I have mentioned above, I went to Starbucks for a coffee. Then I saw this pretty girl; let me say, an above average beauty; over the counter taking orders.

When it was my turn to order my coffee, the conversation went like this:

Girl: Hello sir, what do you like for today?
Me: Hi, I was thinking which coffee is good. If I may ask, what can you recommend for me? :D
Girl: Oh, okay first, would you like it cold or hot?
Me: I like it with whipped cream on top, cold.
Girl: Okay, why don't you try our Dark Mocha Frappuccino? It's the best. :)
Me: Hmm, would you recommend me another one?
Girl: Yes, sir we also have Caramel Frappuccino, it's a good one too. So, would that be a Dark Mocha? (She asked that because I was staring at the Dark Mocha right at that moment.)
Me: Okay...
Girl: Grea—
Me: I'll take the Green Tea
Girl: Hahaha! (She was bursting out laughing, loud. In fact, we both did.) Oh sir, take the Dark Mocha instead, please?
Me: Sure thing. *smiling*

I was just thinking of negging the target after her statement at the end, but I can't do so due to the lack of time thinking what neg should I say, many customers were waiting and we spent like minutes for this conversation. My problems are these:

-Have I done the right thing?
-How can I approach the target with scenarios like this? i.e. The target works in a restaurant, a clothes boutique or a shop and too busy to entertain customers
-When is the right time to transition to the next stage?

That was really my first time approaching a woman, let alone it was a stranger. Maybe I should go out more rather than staying at my house doing fortune-telling for myself, lol.

So what do you guys think?

Note: Sorry about my grammar, I'm from the east and English is not my native language. Thank you. :)
Nice conversation,but don't be happy yet.Wait for asking girls on the street for directions.If you can do that,and change the subject,it's called an approach.
Author:  Scryed [ Sat Jan 07, 2012 8:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks gabi, I'm going to treat that as a challenge to myself. :)

And yeah I agree being smart also helps.

Earlier I went to the mall in order to eliminate my AA, just as what I had taken note: No negs and fishy stuff. So what happened was this:
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Opening a conversation project: Day 1
Results: MEGA FAIL

So, basically the main reason why I failed a while ago was because whenever there was a woman, HB or not in front of me, all I do is stop, think, then think, and think until my AA gets higher and higher.

There were also an instance wherein I opened a (failed) conversation with a couple. I saw the guy playing Street Fighter and his hot gf beside her watching him play. The conversation went out like this:

Me: Excuse me, I've been playing Tekken but I don't know how to play SF, mind teaching me?
Guy: Uh, yeah, just recite this moves yada yada yada..
Me: I see.
(The guy, then begins to focus on his arcade game, I got the attention of the girl for a fraction of a second.)
Me: How about you, miss.. do you play this game together with your bf?
Girl: No.
I was just about to say something, but my body didn't do it.
-End of story-

And things like...

(On a Van's boutique)
Me: Excuse me, I am planning to buy a shoe tomorrow, so which one looks good for me?
Girl: Red one.

-End of story-

Then I went to a local jazz bar, that was my first time going to a local bar ever. I went in, flashed a smile like there's no tomorrow. The bar was a little bit dead so there was no target to open up a conversation. Then I got this idea that opening a conversation with a bar girl is not a bad one, after all I'm not aiming for a number or f-close, just a plain, simple buddy conversation.

I saw this pretty girl entertaining other customers, she's pretty, timid yet stood out from the rest of the other girls. I've decided to talk to her, but then again there was another girl asking for my orders, I needed to talk to my target so this was what I have done:

I opened up the conversation like what I have done in Starbucks, but this time I made a small poll among the other girls which one should I take. The option will be onion rings or potato chips. Then I've decided that I'll take the Tuna Sandwich with a beer. Everyone laughed as usual, lol.

Then I got the girl's attention now, I talked to her like a buddy (Just like what Marc advised me), we even made high-fives like three or five times. After that I opened up a topic that there was a research going on about ESPs and such.

I used the ESP routine, she was amazed and she was like patting my shoulders and asking me for a second round. Instead, I ran fortune-telling with my cards, since Scrying is what I liked the most, and that's what I do best. Then using the cards, I told her about her pasts, present then future. The best part was, after telling her past she opened up a conversation regarding her ex-bf, her family, etc. I felt like I've been friend-zoned.

Then after these engaging activities, she went back to work. Marc advised that I should be observing my surroundings, from what I've observed the girl was always there standing like three to four feet behind me whenever there was no customer to entertain with.

The bar was closing as I type this post, and I always catch a moment wherein this girl was smiling, staring at me with that look in her eyes as if a cat had a free catch of a mouse. She even held my hand and said, "You don't do anything at home, do you? Your hands are thin, soft just like a girl's. Mine are calloused."

I was like: "Ok."

One of the bar girls(not her) asked my number. But I didn't asked hers(the target).

I was not a number-close, but it's alright since I have lots of time to improve myself and eventually I will get there. My main concern was that after being friends with her and such, the air went silent. To make it short, I ran out of things to say to other people other than, "How do you do this?", "Which is which?", etc.

But I enjoyed this night no doubt, perhaps getting out of the house and talking the shit out of someone was not a bad idea after all. I'm going to go to the mall again the next day and then open up a conversation with someone, but this time I'll get it right.

Just keep your advises ringing in to me. I really, really appreciate your help guys. Thanks and have a busy night gaming while I'm asleep on the other time-zone. LOL


-Scryed out
Author:  Collide [ Thu Jan 12, 2012 10:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
Liie your style man! That humor-opener with people behind counters is great. Keep us updated!
Author:  Chai [ Sat Jan 14, 2012 7:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Although it wasn't a real approach, I'll still give you props for trying brother :)
Most people I know would be too scared to make a small change
in order to change within themselves!

And since you had the courage to actually try something
outside your comfort zone... I'll give you one of my reputation points
for good measure. Just keep us updated yeah? I can tell just
from your posts energy we can expect cool things from you...

Take it easy dude and goodluck.

[1 REPUTATION POINT GIVEN]

- Chai
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