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| Critique my material https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=10040 |
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| Author: | Murdoc [ Wed Oct 31, 2007 4:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | Critique my material |
I'm going out on thursday and I wrote some stuff that I wanna use because I feel awkward about Mystery's lines. Mystery's stuff may have been used already now that he's so popular and I don't wanna be called out on bullshit when the chicks I see know for a fact there were no chicks outside fighting. Please read my material. I tried to embed some DHV aspects into it. Naturally I'll be negging any HB who interrupts me. Please make suggestions and point out any major flaws this may have. **************** Begin Routine Now: **************** PUA: Well it looks like the party's over here! Hey guys, I want your opinion on something. Who lies more, Men or Women? Group: XXXXX PUA: Okay, okay, well who do you think is better at lying? Group: XXXXX PUA: Well check this out, before I leave you. After dating a girl for a year, I found out that she lied about various things. She lied about being into the same things that I'm into; such as Jazz and Art. She also lied and told me she'd only slept with quite a few guys when in reality she'd only been with 3 before me. After I learned the truth I didn't trust her so much and we just drifted apart. Why would a girl lie about such things? Group: XXXXX PUA: Well, whatever. One of my best friends, Rob met this girl a month ago. He's 25 and she tells him she's 28. That's not a huge age difference so he was cool with it. He calls me up today because he just saw her driver's license. She was born in 1971. That makes her 36. That's a pretty big difference. Rob tells me "When I was leaving the first grade, she was graduating high school". Why do women have to lie about their age? Group: XXXXX PUA: So Rob wants my advice. He knows I'll be honest. But I'd never tell someone to dump their lover. It's just not my place. Plus, from what I know of her, or what I THINK I know of her, she's got ideal female qualities. Rob tells me that she has a great energy, and an awesome outlook on life. She digs one of my buddies so that means she's got great taste too. It's a shame she would lie about her age, but do you think it's worth breaking up over? Group: XXXXX PUA: So how do you all know each other? ******************************************* |
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| Author: | SirSlick [ Wed Oct 31, 2007 6:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Your opener was used on the Vh1 show, so I advise you not to use it. You might get called out. Every thread ends with a question, I think that will get boring. Try to add some humor to your stories. Second, I don't see any valuable DHV spikes. Try to add some classic MM spikes; -leader of men -protector of loved ones -social proof (friends/who you know) -pre-selection (ex-girlfriend etc) |
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