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Question about approaching
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Author:  Average_afc [ Thu Sep 01, 2011 12:05 am ]
Post subject:  Question about approaching
Hello everyone,
I am fairly new to this PUA stuff and i have newbie question. So I did my newbie mission yesterday. Went to a mall and my mission was to say "hi, how are you doing today?." to everyone i see(Prefrably HBs). I didn't think i will have any problems with this(my job requires me to talk to strangers all the time). Anyway as expected i didn't have any AA to approach a stranger.

So this i what i would Do.
I would to say hi only when we are walking opposite direction. and when i am about 5 feets away from the sets. I would say hi. HOw are you doing today? while i'm still walking and continue walking.

I approached about 20-25 sets mostly HB 7 and above. But to my shock. These HBs act like they didn't even hear it. I mean isn't that the polite thing to do.when someone says hi to you. you say hi to them. i mean these HBs didn't even turn their heads. i mean if you hear a voice coming from less than 5 feets aren't you auto programmed to turn your head in that direction. The only people that would repond is guys and older women.
AS far as i am concerned i think i was very confident with the approach. So i really don't know what went wrong there. I mean even before i got into this PUA stuff i am someone who just says hi to everyone on a grocery store, or a line or on the street(not to HBs though. Didn't realized that until i got into this PUA stuff). and i've always gotten a response.

So after analysing the situation i think the only mistake that i would have made while approaching is.
1) Maybe my energy level was too high.
2) since i kept on walking it didn't give them time to respond.
3) i should only say hi. when i get eye contact( how often does that happen??)

But again the older women and guys would respond with enthusiasm. So really don't know how i should improve on this to get a response.. Has any of the you guys had similar situtaion.

May be i should stand on their way and then say hi. or what should i do???. In order for them to respond. i am not trying to close or anything( i have a long way to do in order to acheive that.) But a simple hi.
And also how do you expect to run an opinion opener on these HBs?? Why would they give you their opinion. When they think they're too good to simply say hi to a friendly person who just greeted them.

Thanks in advance for all comments and suggestions.
Average_afc
Author:  Notorious J [ Thu Sep 01, 2011 2:09 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Question about approaching
Quote:

I approached about 20-25 sets mostly HB 7 and above. But to my shock. These HBs act like they didn't even hear it. I mean isn't that the polite thing to do.when someone says hi to you. you say hi to them. i mean these HBs didn't even turn their heads. i mean if you hear a voice coming from less than 5 feets aren't you auto programmed to turn your head in that direction. The only people that would repond is guys and older women.
Are you sure they heard you? Were they engaged in a conversation already?
Quote:

So after analysing the situation i think the only mistake that i would have made while approaching is.
1) Maybe my energy level was too high.
2) since i kept on walking it didn't give them time to respond.
3) i should only say hi. when i get eye contact( how often does that happen??)

I don't think your energy level was the problem. If you're just saying "hi" to people this won't be an issue. Be sure you project, smile and attempt to make eye contact.

Also - remember that others have approach anxiety as well. Not everyone is in a social headspace during the day, so don't get discouraged if somebody completely ignores you.
Quote:


May be i should stand on their way and then say hi. or what should i do???. In order for them to respond. i am not trying to close or anything( i have a long way to do in order to acheive that.) But a simple hi.
This is too confrontational. I'd be willing to bet you'll get quite a few negative responses from this.
Quote:

And also how do you expect to run an opinion opener on these HBs?? Why would they give you their opinion. When they think they're too good to simply say hi to a friendly person who just greeted them.
You're making this too big of a deal and making unfair generalizations based on this one experience. If you approach and open with confidence, more often than not you'll get a conversation going.
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