| PUA Forum https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| Second Contact? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=50&t=60447 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | Onoma [ Tue Jan 19, 2010 4:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Second Contact? |
Is there a point at which it becomes ok to send a girl a second message on a dating site, if she never replied to your first? I ask only because I feel like I've gone through just about everyone attractive to me in my area in the last few days. A corollary would be, if you had a short conversation going and she just never replied to your last message should you just wait a couple days and try to start it back up again somehow? |
|
| Author: | GvCIA [ Tue Jan 19, 2010 5:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Good question, I was wondering the same thing. Common sense would say to wait AT LEAST 2 or 3 days. I would say depends on the conversation [if any] and how it ended. |
|
| Author: | PUA Kenny [ Tue Jan 19, 2010 5:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Great question Onoma.Im killing my brain trying to figure that out too. I'd messaged a girl on fb(to her inbox),she didn't reply.So I sent her another 1(Fucc!!!)about 3-4 days later.No reply again;it's been 4 days since the last(the 2nd.)msg I'd sent. I said to myself,either this witch canot read or she gets so much msgs that mines got bypassed(lol)!!! But really though Onoma,I believe your sticking point and mines are based on 1 thing-low attraction or no attraction.We haven't done enough to attract the target thus she doesn't feel an impulse to reply. I can say for sure that my cases deal with exactly that -low attraction.I hadn't done enough to attract her(DHV stories,etc.).Whatever the answer is,Im puzzled also but I'd waited 3-4 days to re-message her. |
|
| Author: | jurupa [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:10 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you get no reply back from you first message, wait at least a good 3/4 months before you message her again. By then she would most probably not remember you and so you are starting fresh. Sending a second message shortly after the first will scream "desperate" to a lot of girls. And that will kill your chances of ever getting her number. Some would like the fact that you where persistent but then here you are playing into her hand which is never good unless you are good at turning such things around. |
|
| Author: | RockyD [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
i believe you shouldn't send a second. if your first was good enough you wouldn't be in this situation. look up some decent first messages. too many and you look desperate! |
|
| Author: | PUA Kenny [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:28 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
What you said should be common knowledge Jurupa(the seeming desperate part). But waiting 3-4 months to send another msg seems too damn long!She would forget you by then.I guess its a double-eded sword.If you wait too long-she forget you.But you can start anew. |
|
| Author: | RockyD [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 12:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
yeah i agree, month is 2 long let alone 3-4 . i wouldnt bother trying to start again, you might look like a stalker or she might reply the awquard " aren't you that guy. . ." |
|
| Author: | skypirate1965 [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 5:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Hi guys, this is simple. Send out your first mail/message. If there is no reply within a respectable/sensible timeframe send a reminder-type mail (I usually give it 3 or 4 days). Very few men send reminders and my experience as shown that girls DO pick these up. It works as I've had 3 dates from reminders. I think that girls get overwhelmed with emails and so at times just ignore them or bulk delete. Unfortunately your great 1st email may get deleted in a second along with the other 50 lame emails she gets. I think it has little to do with attraction and more to do with time. I never push beyond 2 reminders in the total process. If they keep need reminding they really are not worth it. As for gaming girls again, I think this is very possible but you should give it 2 or 3 months gap. If the online game never went to meeting then game them again. Never game anyone who has given you a clear rejection (not replying to your mails is NOT a rejection imho) I've had some limited success in re-gaming a few months later. It's amazing that the women who ignore your mails one time will respond at a later time. So here it is guys - game girls until they reject you. If this means sending reminders a few times do it! When you see the volumes of mails girls get you'll understand that it is very little to do with attraction as many girls will simply ignore or delete your mails due to the volume. Persistence does produce results. |
|
| Author: | PUA Kenny [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 7:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I have to disagree with you Rocky D on waiting too long would make you seem like a stalker. We do agree on waiting months is out of the question,but to re-messaging her after months won't make you look stalkerish. Great insight SkyPirate,that post was fucking great!!! Just to add to your point,we guys must realize that HB's or even UG(ugly girls)are being bombarded with tons of messages per day that they just can't keep up.Unlike guys who getting 2 msgs a week. Girls just can't keep up with the weirdos sending them 10 msg s a day,so the alphas messages like ours get deleted all in bulk.Chics don't have time to sought through 50 msgs!!!! |
|
| Author: | Onoma [ Wed Jan 20, 2010 7:49 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote:
Just to add to your point,we guys must realize that HB's or even UG(ugly girls)are being bombarded with tons of messages per day that they just can't keep up.Unlike guys who getting 2 msgs a week.
2 messages a week? Damn... I really must need new profile pics. I think I've received 3 messages in my entire 3 YEARS on okcupid, and most of the time it's from girls I'm not interested in. 
|
|
| Author: | skypirate1965 [ Thu Jan 21, 2010 1:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: ...
Compliment accepted but my insights are a result of persistent online game for 7 months. I feel like some hardened soldier who has fought in the online trenches!Great insight SkyPirate,that post was fucking great!!!... I'll give an example of re-gaming. About 6 months ago when I was still very 'green' about online stuff I mailed this cute looking woman. I think she asked for more pics of me so I sent and never heard from her again. At that time I was not doing reminders etc so I left it About a month or two later I was mailling girls on the site and as I was using a different username/profile I thought I'd game her (I had read more about Game at that point). We did a few emails and then one night it turned to chat and I fucked it up as she mentioned a boyfriend. I slipped into AFC mode and started dissing her and the boyfriend.Not the thing to do. Before Christmas I spotted that this girl was online again on the site I use and with a bit of masochism I mailled her again. She asked for some photos and I sent them. I never heard from her. I suspected she just simply did not find me her 'type' (shorthand for not living up to her expectations in looks) While tieing up lots of loose ends I sent her a reminder - this morning I got a reply and it seems as if she IS interested in meeting.This defies logic. Apart from the time I handled the 'boyfriend' wrongly I've always been polite - girls get so much rudeness and obscenities from guys it's amazing. I think it proves that persistence does pay. If your 'pool' of targets is large it's probably best not to re-game but if it's small re-game until rejection. People's views of persistence or harassment vary widely. Once I was seeing this girl in a weird on-off non-relationship-LJBF thing and one female friend thought I was stalking this girl as I'd sent her 2 texts and 1 email in a week. Another female friend said she didn't think anything of it and was surprised that I had not sent more to that girl. |
|
| Author: | jurupa [ Fri Jan 22, 2010 8:12 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: What you said should be common knowledge Jurupa(the seeming desperate part). Thats the point. If your first message was not a success the chances of your "reminder" message working is not that high. I am not saying it won't work. But you are better off reopening the girl at a later time as then she would have completely forgotten about you and your message.
But waiting 3-4 months to send another msg seems too damn long!She would forget you by then.I guess its a double-eded sword.If you wait too long-she forget you.But you can start anew. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|