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How to Respond to a Girl Who is Explicitly Looking for Sex
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Author:  piercemasters [ Sat Feb 11, 2012 5:07 pm ]
Post subject:  How to Respond to a Girl Who is Explicitly Looking for Sex

Sound like a no-brainer? Not so. I dated a girl whose OKCupid profile stated that she was happily living with another woman, but was looking for a few strictly sexual experiences with men. Can you imagine how many responses she got? On some days, she didn’t even bother reading the messages before deleting them. In her words “Men stopped just short of sending pictures of their crotches.”

She only ended up dating two guys, and I was one of hem. I did it by not hitting on her. I told her that I appreciated her openness and adventurousness, and stopped short of showing her I was attracted to the idea of spontaneous, casual sex. This, of course, got her interest. She wrote back immediately, and we ended up going out.

Why did she choose me? Because women – even this one – need to inhabit a comfort zone when interacting on-line, before actually meeting. I gave her two things: 1) an acknowledgement that her behavior was OK and even admirable, and 2) a degree of security about my person. Women – even if they just want sex – are still ‘selectors’, and with her stated desire for sex, she had a huge pool to select from.

Give women acknowledgement and comfort, otherwise you run the risk of being viewed as a creep.

Author:  jurupa [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 10:17 am ]
Post subject: 

I have more of a feeling it more had to do with the fact that you straight up didn't say "I want to fuck you" in your messages to her. Yes sex was a topic but you went about it in a totally different way which in short separated you from the other guys. Not saying comfort and what have you help but doing the simple things like this can set you apart from the other guys by miles.

Author:  piercemasters [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 12:43 pm ]
Post subject: 

Yes, but I think there is one simple fact that men don't take into account when meeting women on-line: It can be dangerous for women. For men, not so much. Communicating on-line, as opposed to face to face in a bar, a women can't take cues from body language, and body language communicates far more than what you are actually saying. In your messaging, you have to radiate comfort, because that is all she has to go on.

Author:  OthatsNASTY [ Sun Feb 12, 2012 1:30 pm ]
Post subject: 

Found myself in a similar situation today with a girl on OKcupid. She had all sorts of sexy lingerie pics up. so i came up with an opener that worked...so far at least.

Me: So, I'm trying out this new thing I read about, its an anti-masturbation diet. Which basically means no playing with myself because it is supposed to be good for your health. I just want to let you know how angry I am at you for making it so very difficult to stick with it ;)

Her:Lmao that's a new one.

However, studies show that masturbation can actually improve the quality of ones life. Especially in males it can reduce the risk of prostate cancer. Plus, it's also a good stress reliever; stress has been know to severally decline a person health. But nowadays there are so many different (see: insane) diets out there. Whatever floats your boat. I'm a big supporter of masturbation (I do it a few times a day) I'm going to try my best to deter you from this "diet"

Ooh I got technical on you.
yes, I'm a loser... Lol

Author:  jurupa [ Mon Feb 13, 2012 1:27 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Yes, but I think there is one simple fact that men don't take into account when meeting women on-line: It can be dangerous for women. For men, not so much. Communicating on-line, as opposed to face to face in a bar, a women can't take cues from body language, and body language communicates far more than what you are actually saying. In your messaging, you have to radiate comfort, because that is all she has to go on.
I totally agree with you. I am not saying the reasons why what you did work are wrong at all. But more in this case the simple fact that you didn't say "I want to fuck you" separated you from the other guys big time. I think that was the bigger factor here than the comfort was.

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