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During a meeting the other day, I was introduced to an older gentleman who was incredibly smooth and confident. I was in a situation that made me very nervous so I continuously broke eye contact with him. Here's the thing, he stared into my eyes without saying anything during the conversation a number of times and at the end of the conversation he just looked dead in my right eye for about 5 seconds after the conversation was over. This made me very nervous, but I fought to keep connected to him. During the first couple of minutes I tried to mimic what he was doing, but couldn't get past the awkwardness of it because it felt like we were a gay couple or something.
How do you guys deal with situations like this. I'm training my brain to say "fuck it" during these moments and would like some feedback on this. I noticed a number of people at this meeting did this. Another guy sitting right next to me very close, starred at me hard after completing his sentence and it just looked really stressed so I didn't connect with him because it felt like crap eye contact, like he was trying to prove something stupid like he can really pee standing up or something I just don't give a shit about.
Eye Contact is way over rated ...especially between males as often it is a play for dominance. The fact that you notice it should be enough you dont need to mirror this behavior. One tip from NLP and Hypnosis is to focus on your own inner state. Here is a trick you can use.
When you meet someone new...anyone male or female ...inside your mind remember someone who you like very much...someone you have a great relationship with...the kind where you just "click" as you walk up imagine that this is the person standing in front of you ...when you feel that kind of connection by yourself the matching and mirroring of body language happens naturally. there will be no need to even think about it because your subconscious mind already knows how to connect on that level and does so automatically with everyone you already have a relationship with. The is how you create instant rapport.
CHAT