Humiliation and Embarrassment



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Inner Game » Social Shyness & Anxiety




Author Message
PostPosted: Wed Aug 21, 2013 8:58 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 3:51 pm
Posts: 31
Hello Guys,


I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language.
I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice.

In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident.
The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down.

When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin:

"You don't shower
or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around
for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to
the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation
again."

Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips?


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:04 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri May 17, 2013 9:58 pm
Posts: 8
I went through some shit like this in high school. The quickest most effective way to get through these situations is to surround yourself with new people. Do things like take dance classes, go to coffee shops, get a job in a different part of town, or anything that involves new people. Then if the old people are really that important you can return later with a new found confidence and possibly even a girl! Either way.. Staying still and doing nothing will get you nowhere.


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:33 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Zealot
User avatar

Joined: Mon May 20, 2013 3:38 pm
Posts: 323
Surrounding yourself with new people isn't a bad idea, as mentioned above.

But, I bet your problem is more of an internal one, you may have had an embarassing experience, but everyone does at some point in their life, the question is how you deal with it.

Are you going to go out a fighter or are you going to take the emotional hit from society?

Society can have a huge emotional impact on people, for example, in some cultures they celebrate the deaths of loved ones, they find it to be a joyous occasion. The day after a loved one dies, these people wake up, and continue living happily. To us, that sounds foreign, and even disrespectful to the dead.

Similarly, if you have your pants pulled down in public, or if you piss your pants, our society dictates that you should feel embarassed, and ashamed, and because of that expectation, you do feel embarassed and ashamed. There's nothing preventing you from laughing at yourself other than your own mind, and your limiting beliefs. Think about it, are you all of a sudden a different person because of this event? Your mind will set you free.


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 2:12 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Zealot

Joined: Fri Nov 04, 2011 4:38 pm
Posts: 390
tell us what you did son.

did you go to the store, then the bank, then the post office, then the coffee shop, then work and then realize you forgot to put on clothes that day


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 4:26 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Thu Mar 14, 2013 3:51 pm
Posts: 31
Quote:
tell us what you did son.

did you go to the store, then the bank, then the post office, then the coffee shop, then work and then realize you forgot to put on clothes that day
I don't wnat to share it but it what you described is worse


Top
   
PostPosted: Thu Aug 22, 2013 6:36 pm 
Offline
The Coach
User avatar

Joined: Sun Jun 19, 2011 7:44 am
Posts: 4170
Location: Chicago, IL
Quote:
Hello Guys,


I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language.
I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice.

In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident.
The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down.

When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin:

"You don't shower
or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around
for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to
the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation
again."

Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips?
Stop taking life so seriously. There are over 7 billion people on this planet. Why do you think you matter so much?


Top
   
PostPosted: Fri Aug 23, 2013 8:15 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Addict

Joined: Fri Jan 13, 2012 9:30 pm
Posts: 217
Location: England
As a someone recovering from depersonalization and derealization I sympathise about the anxiety and embarrassment you are suffering from.... There is nothing I can post here that will remove your symptoms, your road to recovery will be a long tedious affair and your the only person that can do it.

You have obviously decided to improve your current situation otherwise you won't be here so lets get down to the details.

You had a bad experience and this bad experience was the trigger for you to descend into high levels of anxiety around people which I guess has now turned habitual. Your real issue isn't this "event" its the habitual anxiety which you have to contend with daily.

Once you see your "terrible emotions" as just a bad habit it should make it easier to contend with, all you have to do is correct a bad habit.... Now back to that incident, I strongly urge you to post it on here as keeping this emotional trauma locked up inside you isn't doing you any favours. Draw a picture, write a poem about it, anything... expressing your feelings about it will noticeably help.

There is hundreds upon hundreds of practices littered across the internet to help you deal with this anxiety so I'm not going to list them all , I would recommend developing the habit of self amusement mentioned above, throw in some meditation and exercise should defiantly help you out.

_________________
My journal: eyrie-s-journal-to-becoming-the-man-vt148355.html

--If you are not giving, you are not living--


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 7 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link