KNOWING WHAT YOURE DOIN



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 Post subject: KNOWING WHAT YOURE DOIN
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2008 11:57 am 
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If you knew exactly what to say to a woman and exactly what to do when chatting her up, why would you be anxious to approach a woman, you would'nt. Why should you have fear of talking to her if you knew. But if you did'nt know what to say or do then you would be unsure whether to approach or not.

So what im saying is make sure you know what to do and then anxiety should'nt be a problem, make sure you are comfortable with yourself and you're abilities, with the right frame of mind you will have the confidence to approach every time.

Think of it as riding a bike, at first you are shy to get on the bike and try to ride it because you may fall off, that hurts and can make you look stupid. So you fear doing it for this reason, you are scared to ride the bike because you dont know what you are doing, but you are determined to get it right because you know once you have learnt how to do it, it will all be worth it in the end. So you keep trying and falling off, until you get it and you become better and better at it. And once you have got it right you are not scared of jumping on the bike no more, infact you dont even think about it, you just do it. Because you know exactly what to do.

Learn as much as you can and learn the things you need/have to learn to be able to talk with a woman without fear. They say in field experience is key, true. Your confidence will grow with the more success you have, but no matter how much sarging experience you have, if you dont learn the things you need to, the approach anxiety wont go away. So make sure you have the right things to say, and know exactly what your doing in any given situation, then you will have the confidence to approach every time.

(its not who you know, its what you know)

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To effectively communicate, we must realise that we are all different in the way we percieve the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 11:05 pm 
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Joined: Mon Jun 09, 2008 7:38 pm
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Quote:
If you knew exactly what to say to a woman and exactly what to do when chatting her up, why would you be anxious to approach a woman, you would'nt.
This is logical but here..the emotion is nothing logical and you need to destroy the emotion not to convince the mind.
Why do you have to know exactly what to say to her in order to approach her?(This sounds to me like a limiting belief)
Quote:
But if you did'nt know what to say or do then you would be unsure whether to approach or not.
This is not true. For example, you can go to a girl and say that you no idea what to talk to her..and because you will have good energy..you may as well develop a great conversation...

Quote:
Think of it as riding a bike, at first you are shy to get on the bike and try to ride it because you may fall off, that hurts and can make you look stupid. So you fear doing it for this reason, you are scared to ride the bike because you dont know what you are doing, but you are determined to get it right because you know once you have learnt how to do it, it will all be worth it in the end. So you keep trying and falling off, until you get it and you become better and better at it. And once you have got it right you are not scared of jumping on the bike no more, infact you dont even think about it, you just do it. Because you know exactly what to do.
Good metaphor but it's not directly applicable here. It doesn't explain why if you know exactly what to do the problem is solved...this is BS.
It took me a while to learn to ride a bike but I didn't have any fear when I learned it. My body didn't know how to maintain equilibrium..that's all.
Quote:
but no matter how much sarging experience you have, if you dont learn the things you need to, the approach anxiety wont go away. So make sure you have the right things to say, and know exactly what your doing in any given situation, then you will have the confidence to approach every time.
This is BS..it's just a way of saying to somebody when he cannot do it...that the Reason is Because He Doesn't know Exactly what to do ... and he still has something to learn in order to be perfect..in order to approach.
Watch "The Peaceful Warrior " for more about not needing to be perfect and being an exceptional human being regardless of the result of your actions. You are exceptional the way you are..you don't need to "make up" for something that doesn't exist.

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Reduce Approach Anxiety with "joye pete technique"


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