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Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attraction&
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Author:  PlayHer Man [ Sun Oct 31, 2010 4:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attraction&
I want to talk about this because it seems to be an area where I disagree with most of the PUA's on this forum. And maybe I'm wrong, but I can only go off my experience.

Basically I hold the opinion that approaching a woman and closing her in 1 minute will get you the same results as closing her in 10 or 15 minutes. I go for speed and I usually ask for her number after only a minute of conversation. Then I text her after that and eventually meet up.

Most of the PUA's here say this is a bad move and its better to talk longer and DHV. But from my experience the more you talk the more you give yourself opportunities to turn her off. You become less mysterious and give her more reasons to reject you. Plus you waste more time you could be using to meet other girls.

Attraction happens very fast... and if you open and close strong and fast.. women will respond. If done properly.. closing fast will DHV because it says to her: "You are not better than me and I have nothing to prove to you".
Author:  F_I_X_E_R [ Sun Oct 31, 2010 4:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attract
Quote:
I want to talk about this because it seems to be an area where I disagree with most of the PUA's on this forum. And maybe I'm wrong, but I can only go off my experience.

Basically I hold the opinion that approaching a woman and closing her in 1 minute will get you the same results as closing her in 10 or 15 minutes. I go for speed and I usually ask for her number after only a minute of conversation. Then I text her after that and eventually meet up.

Most of the PUA's here say this is a bad move and its better to talk longer and DHV. But from my experience the more you talk the more you give yourself opportunities to turn her off. You become less mysterious and give her more reasons to reject you. Plus you waste more time you could be using to meet other girls.

Attraction happens very fast... and if you open and close strong and fast.. women will respond. If done properly.. closing fast will DHV because it says to her: "You are not better than me and I have nothing to prove to you".
The correct phrase is "The stronger the connection between you, the stronger the attraction"

This means knowing core things about her and understanding her world, thus she'll trust you more and have a reason to meet you up after you call.

She won't go out with the guy, who knows nothing about her and his "get laid" agenda is the only reason he wants to see her.
Author:  PlayHer Man [ Sun Oct 31, 2010 5:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
What if she has the same agenda? Some girls just want to get laid too.

Why waste time on women with a different agenda than yourself?

I usually close with "let me have your number so we can grab coffee sometime" which leaves room for "getting to know me more" if thats what she wants.
Author:  F_I_X_E_R [ Sun Oct 31, 2010 5:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
What if she has the same agenda? Some girls just want to get laid too.

Why waste time on women with a different agenda than yourself?

I usually close with "let me have your number so we can grab coffee sometime" which leaves room for "getting to know me more" if thats what she wants.
Well yes. If it is obviously on then sure. That has happened to me only once. Very few girls are sexually confident and don't care if they'd be labeled as sluts. Girls want to get laid as bad as men do, but most have anti slut defense thus they need some reason to see you, an excuse even if they're 100% sure they want to sleep with you.
Author:  PlayHer Man [ Sun Oct 31, 2010 6:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
What if she has the same agenda? Some girls just want to get laid too.

Why waste time on women with a different agenda than yourself?

I usually close with "let me have your number so we can grab coffee sometime" which leaves room for "getting to know me more" if thats what she wants.
Well yes. If it is obviously on then sure. That has happened to me only once. Very few girls are sexually confident and don't care if they'd be labeled as sluts. Girls want to get laid as bad as men do, but most have anti slut defense thus they need some reason to see you, an excuse even if they're 100% sure they want to sleep with you.
I agree. Thats why you offer the coffee date as an opportunity for her to make a decision about you. Plus, she gets free coffee.

So she has nothing to lose. If she is single and lonely this is a very attractive offer.

You make the offer so casual and so attractive that there is no reason for her to reject you. Plus, you only have to talk to her for 1 or 2 minutes. Beats spending 20 minutes talking to her only to hear "I have a boyfriend" when you try to close.
Author:  Trotyl [ Mon Nov 01, 2010 10:18 am ]
Post subject: 
I think you have to notice the difference between building attraction in 1min and in 10min. As where building attraction in 1min is usually better because it shows you're confident and can easily escalate. However most pickups last about 10min because you can throw in a connection and building rapport so she actually remembers you. Attraction comes and goes, a strong emotional connection usually stays.
I understand where you're coming from though, it either works or it doesn't and no one likes a timewaster.
Author:  jurupa [ Mon Nov 01, 2010 12:46 pm ]
Post subject: 
I forgot the guy's name but some PUA guru came up with this theory which is the mini skirt theory. It was more directed to online game with profiles but I think it applies here as well.

The theory goes that you need to provide enough "leg" or info about you to get the girls attraction/interest, but to to give to much "leg" or info as then there is no mystery there. But not to cover up too much "leg" or give out too little info so that you don't hook her.
Author:  Reo [ Tue Nov 02, 2010 6:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attract
Quote:
I want to talk about this because it seems to be an area where I disagree with most of the PUA's on this forum. And maybe I'm wrong, but I can only go off my experience.

Basically I hold the opinion that approaching a woman and closing her in 1 minute will get you the same results as closing her in 10 or 15 minutes. I go for speed and I usually ask for her number after only a minute of conversation. Then I text her after that and eventually meet up.

Most of the PUA's here say this is a bad move and its better to talk longer and DHV. But from my experience the more you talk the more you give yourself opportunities to turn her off. You become less mysterious and give her more reasons to reject you. Plus you waste more time you could be using to meet other girls.

Attraction happens very fast... and if you open and close strong and fast.. women will respond. If done properly.. closing fast will DHV because it says to her: "You are not better than me and I have nothing to prove to you".
I agree that you shouldn't spend 15 to 20 mins talking to a girl only to find out she has a boyfriend and leave a sense of mystery about yourself. But It feel like you're just telling me and everyone else to just go out and close in 1 min. That's easier said than done for most people

What exactly are saying to these women in 1 min? Some Example dialogue of what you have actually said would be helpful. Is there some specific technique?
Quote:
I usually close with "let me have your number so we can grab coffee sometime" which leaves room for "getting to know me more" if thats what she wants.
The Coffee date is a game killer. It is the ultimate nice guy lame date. You'll greatly ruin the sense of mystery about yourself. You're forced to do all the talking for 30-40mins where it can get boring and you run the risk of saying something stupid or proving your really not that interesting. Its hard to go from coffee to your place or even a kiss. Its almost the equivalent of taking her to dinner.
Author:  Jav [ Tue Nov 02, 2010 7:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree partly,

But imo it's about how fast you're going through the steps of seducing her, 10 minutes or 20 minutes.

That's the only difference, you'll still need to go through the steps.

Ofc, you can skip some steps, but that's just certain situations.


But then again,

Talking to a girl for an hour and a half and not getting rejected=higher constincy.



Also,

closing fast doesn't mean you're not trying to prove yourself, the need to 'prove yourself' is a mentality, not an action.


Someone with proper game can choose which way he wants to go with a girl, making this whole discussion redundant.

There really is no 'best' way. it's this way or another, the goal remains the same
Author:  RamboBlack [ Sat Nov 13, 2010 8:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attract
Quote:
I want to talk about this because it seems to be an area where I disagree with most of the PUA's on this forum. And maybe I'm wrong, but I can only go off my experience.

Basically I hold the opinion that approaching a woman and closing her in 1 minute will get you the same results as closing her in 10 or 15 minutes. I go for speed and I usually ask for her number after only a minute of conversation. Then I text her after that and eventually meet up.

Most of the PUA's here say this is a bad move and its better to talk longer and DHV. But from my experience the more you talk the more you give yourself opportunities to turn her off. You become less mysterious and give her more reasons to reject you. Plus you waste more time you could be using to meet other girls.

Attraction happens very fast... and if you open and close strong and fast.. women will respond. If done properly.. closing fast will DHV because it says to her: "You are not better than me and I have nothing to prove to you".
I totally agree I remember I talked to this one girl who was a solid 8.5 for 45 minutes, I got into her head and liked me "i thought" we were going to go to the beach and all. When I called her a couple days later she didn't answer and she never did...less talking the better.
Author:  PlayHer Man [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Myth that long conversations mean "Stronger attract
Quote:
I agree that you shouldn't spend 15 to 20 mins talking to a girl only to find out she has a boyfriend and leave a sense of mystery about yourself. But It feel like you're just telling me and everyone else to just go out and close in 1 min. That's easier said than done for most people

What exactly are saying to these women in 1 min? Some Example dialogue of what you have actually said would be helpful. Is there some specific technique?
Well after opening I ask her some basic questions like her name and where she is from. Then I'll give her a compliment (beautiful smile, nice hair, nice style, cute shoes, whatever).

Now the most important thing here is vibes and energy. Like I said.. attraction happens fast. If a woman is giving good energy and good vibes I know she is attracted. At this point I say.. "well I have to go meet my friends and I'm already late... whats your number? I'd love to grab coffee with you sometime." If I open a girl and she gives me bad vibes, bad energy or seems unfriendly.. I will just walk away rather than trying to force attraction. Why jump through hoops? If a woman is not initially attracted then she will likely never be unless you have money or some other superfical thing to offer. But who wants women like that? The best women to meet are the ones that want to meet you. Time is precious.
Quote:
I usually close with "let me have your number so we can grab coffee sometime" which leaves room for "getting to know me more" if thats what she wants.
Quote:
The Coffee date is a game killer. It is the ultimate nice guy lame date. You'll greatly ruin the sense of mystery about yourself. You're forced to do all the talking for 30-40mins where it can get boring and you run the risk of saying something stupid or proving your really not that interesting. Its hard to go from coffee to your place or even a kiss. Its almost the equivalent of taking her to dinner.
I agree with you.. the coffee date IS a game killer. But guess what? The coffee date is just a way to close casually and get her number. Once I have her number I can change the terms later! And I do.

I'm tricky like that :)
Author:  Mind Hacker [ Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
From my experience so far, curiosity/intrigue is good foundation for attraction.

If you reveal too much of you in long conversations you risk attraction, but build comfort.

IMHO, part of attraction is imagining how could you be instead of how you're really are. She has to picture that prince charming of her fantasies in you, but it has to be all her idea.
Author:  kasabi [ Tue Nov 16, 2010 12:21 am ]
Post subject: 
Depends on how much you have to offer. If all you have are a few cans and a clown act, then by all means, end it quick and hope you get lucky.
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