First and foremost, I am no PUA. Actually, I'm still pretty damn inexperienced. But somehow over this month I went from being the slightly needy shy guy with shit inner game to the point where I'm at now. Lately I feel invincible and genuinely fearless when it comes to approaching women and I think I've finally pinpointed how that process worked itself out. I went from being the funny beta male to the strong alpha who I've always wanted to be. I call this process my "Trial by Fire" and while I am far from finished and still have a long way to go, I feel 100 percent secure with myself and am wholly confident that I am closer than ever. This technique doesn't have any fancy gimmicks, I don't use lines or canned material and I don't have any sort of quick fix. This isn't a strategy that you're going to be able to read about at home and hope or pray that somehow you'll develop what you need. In order for this advice to work you need to dedicate yourself 100 percent to actually getting off your ass and going out. You'll make some stupid AFC mistakes but you will learn from every single one of them.
Beginning the Process
The first step of developing inner game is finding out who you actually are and adding that realization to an understanding of what you have to offer. So in this regard, I want you to make three lists. First: make a list of what makes you good. This could include your sense of humor, your kindness, your chivalry, whatever personality traits that you could add to a relationship of some kind (this is arguably the most important step towards finding your worth). Second: make a list of what makes you a chode. Now, I'm not talking only along the lines of being bad with women, I'm talking about what makes you genuinely less than what you could be in all aspects of your life. Be brutally honest with yourself about your shortcomings as that's the only way to progressively change them. Finally: make a list of everything that makes you an interesting person (if you don't have many interests then develop them). This list should include your passions in life, things you genuinely enjoy and what makes you unique. THIS is what you're going to use to pick up women.
Using the lists
The first list is what you're going to use to build confidence, link these traits to your favorite song; whatever you listen to to get in "state". For me, I've linked my positive attributes to "Add It Up" by the Violent Femmes. The linking of your positive traits is an important process, and once you begin, entering state becomes surprisingly easy. Every time you listen to this song I want you to think of your list, run it over and over again. Listen until it's ingrained into your subconscious and finally you won't even need the process. You'll transition from thinking you're a good guy to KNOWING you're a good guy on a base level. You'll understand that any woman would be lucky to date you; and more importantly; you'll begin to believe it. That's all inner game is. Plus it makes your favorite song even better which is always a plus
.The second list is what you're going to use for self improvement. I hope you really went for it on this one; holding back gets you nowhere. Spend some time analyzing this list but be prepared to challenge your assumptions about yourself. Learn to distinguish the difference between personality traits and limiting beliefs. Nobody is perfect, and none of us ever will be; but you can take active steps towards getting as close as possible. One important thing about this list is not to dwell, this is stuff you're probably going to be working on for quite some time and none of it is going to fix itself over night. Every single person on this earth has weaknesses and there's not a damn thing you can do about it, but yours aren't special. You're not any better or worse than anyone else, nobody is. This list just forces you to acknowledge what you need to work on. Never let it hold you back, and ignore these faults until after the interaction is finished. Keep these out of the field, and when you see your old ways returning you'll be able to identify it and push it out. But most importantly, analyze your weaknesses when perfecting your game. When you're approaching the only things that should be running through your mind is what you learned from the first list and what I'm getting to in the third.
This list is my response to canned material. All of us are interesting, you wouldn't be trolling an online forum about sociological problems relating to the study of women if you weren't at least slightly more kickass than usual
. I've noticed that too many people come here looking to change everything about themselves. The fact of the matter is: all of us have always been enough. Some may lack the experience and yes that could allow for getting women to become easier. But that doesn't mean you should start emulating them. Be your own person, women can smell a fraud from a mile away; you might get some easy lays along the way but it will be for nothing if you've lost everything that makes you a person along the way. The most important part of this list is one thing: passion. It doesn't matter what you're interested in, if you're passionate about what you're speaking about and the woman can see that then you will have shown your value and you will have continued to build your inner game in doing so; and most importantly she'll be attracted to you.Improve Your Avatar
If you haven't done this already the do it now, go buy new clothes but make sure they suit your personality. I'm not going to get too in-depth in this because honestly there's a whole section on dress and fashion, and I don't know very much about it to be honest. Groom yourself well and be well presented at all times, that's all it really comes down to.
Get Out of The Goddamn House
Seriously, you should be doing this already but get up off your ass and go. Use the techniques and develop the rest from there. This is 100 percent the most important part of the "Trial By Fire" actually putting yourself out there. There's nothing to be afraid of. Build your confidence and use what I've given you and you'll do fine. It'll be awkward and uncomfortable at first but eventually it all just becomes fun, and that's how it should be right? Take this moment to commit to taking charge, force yourself to be uncomfortable but force yourself to being the leader not the follower. Lead your own life and the women will follow. So stop reading the forums and go for it, it's always been in your hands: Life if your oyster, it's time to crack open that turgid shell and feast!
