It's all about social patterns/imprints.
You adopt a different set of beliefs and gestures around your friend than you'd around strangers.
Fin could explain this clearer although I'm pretty accurate.
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| Disconnection between your interactions with girls and guys https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=48579 |
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| Author: | Legion [ Sun Jul 12, 2009 9:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Disconnection between your interactions with girls and guys |
When it comes to guys, I occasionally slip into a lazy way of thinking and interacting. I don't bother to make myself look interesting or charismatic. With girls, I instantly (and automatically) snap into cocky-funny mode and I speak up more and make the interaction interesting and vibrant. This has created a fractured sense of myself, a kind of chasm in my personality. I find that I'm sort of a social chameleon - I am very different to different people. With some of my friends, who have never seen me properly interact with women, they wouldn't believe I could have slept with two attractive girls many times over a couple of days (which I did, recently), and when I told him he probably assumed they were complete sluts (which they were not). This is because when I'm with this particular friend, I'm not particularly cocky or charismatic. I guess the best thing to do is try to bridge the gap between PUA “mode” and the rest of my personality, so I overall feel more authentic and whole. Thoughts and insights appreciated. |
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| Author: | -Achilles [ Sun Jul 12, 2009 10:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
that's EXACTLY what happens to me, when i'm with friends I ocasionally talk, maybe more when i'm actually having fun.. but when there's a girl I consider even slightly worth gaming, some sort of social berserker posseses me haha I become c&f, teasing, alpha, expressive.. weird uh? |
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| Author: | xpathofpurityx [ Sun Jul 12, 2009 10:46 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
when I find myself start slipping into that, I'll intentionally go out and work my way into sets of guys I don't know. not only does it work for improving your socializing skills, it can open up new doors such as party invites, and hot sisters;) |
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| Author: | Jav [ Sun Jul 12, 2009 11:40 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
It's all about social patterns/imprints. You adopt a different set of beliefs and gestures around your friend than you'd around strangers. Fin could explain this clearer although I'm pretty accurate.
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| Author: | Fin [ Mon Jul 13, 2009 7:41 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
It's mainly to due with anchors and social cues. Your friends have social roles, and you fit into those social roles, they act as a form of conformity, their presence is an external pressure which slumps you back into your origonal position. However this normally happens when meeting old friends, rather than "any guys". In which case it is a sign that your inner game is lacking that you have not internalised your beliefs and personality. Thus it becomes like an act, it is work, thier are no women around, so their is no reward for continiuing the act so your psyche just drops the act becuase it is to much effort. Work on internalising who you are, eventually you won't act, you will be. |
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| Author: | Legion [ Mon Jul 13, 2009 8:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote:
Thus it becomes like an act, it is work, thier are no women around, so their is no reward for continiuing the act so your psyche just drops the act becuase it is to much effort.
Bingo.
Work on internalising who you are, eventually you won't act, you will be. |
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| Author: | jockingly [ Mon Jul 13, 2009 9:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: It's mainly to due with anchors and social cues.
So what do I have to do if i want to change myself?Your friends have social roles, and you fit into those social roles, they act as a form of conformity, their presence is an external pressure which slumps you back into your origonal position. Should I do like Style said in one of his seminars and find new friends, because the old friends wouldnt be comfortable with me being a different person due to the fact that I wont fit into the social circle anymore. I have always been the "quiet and nice" person with my friends, but that was the old me and like you said before, I couldnt bother to try to be different when Im with them, because it doesnt make much sense to me to do that change. replies appreciated, thx |
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