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| Arrested Development https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=45683 |
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| Author: | David~ [ Sun May 24, 2009 8:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | Arrested Development |
I will write this for my own benefits, and for those of you who can relate, I hope this helps you. This is a reflection of my thoughts after coming home from a good night's sarging. I am struggling to adopt a mindset of "every girl I meet, she wants to fuck me". Internalizing this will be my hardest obstacle in my inner game. My fear of fucking up the lay is burdening. I am too friendly, and afraid to pull the trigger. I could have pulled and laid 3 girls tonight. I failed, because of logistics and fear of pulling the trigger. I just learned a week ago that about 90% of the girls out there are dying to fuck a cool guy, and that they are so rare due to the chode ratio out there. But I cannot internalize it. It's so difficult, yet so simple. I need to let go of all negative threads in my life, and take things as it passes, drop logistically planning things. Have fun for fucks sake. I notice my calibration towards things are improving greatly. It's like puzzle pieces inside myself clicking. I thank Arie for this. He saved me from the chode life of being a PUA. I need to really focus on: dropping the mentality of analyzing, and living in my head to plan things logistically. Have fun. Do not be afraid to pull the trigger, I hate the regret, and about 9/10 times, the girl actually wants me to pull her. Why am I so afraid to use my cock on a hot white chick that wants me? Relax on my outer game, and start internalizing and adopting a new mindset, the mindset that will calibrate best with my persona and outer game/looks. That is all. I will keep updating this. |
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| Author: | madals [ Sun May 24, 2009 9:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
A note on pulling the trigger, how often have you been rejected? Specifically recently. The reason I ask is because A few months ago I started having a problem with it. It started when I got back into going out and approaching in both day and night after a long stint out of it due to having surgery. I couldn't work out what the problem was. I knew they wanted me to pull the trigger, I knew I wanted to pull the trigger and I knew I was going to succeed. So what was stopping me? It wasn't the fear of getting rejected, it was something similar that between The Doc, 870 and a few others I realised. I didn't want to risk my "reputation". This might sound odd, it does to me now, but the whole reason I wasn't doing it was simply that before surgery I was on fire with closing and because of this I had the reputation as the "guy who could" with friends. While I had no problem with being rejected because I knew it wouldn't be that bad, if I didn't get the close my reputation would suffer for it. Now, it wasn't completely ego driven, I was coaching some friends who are not successful with women. I was thinking to myself how they would feel if my reputation went, how it would affect their success rates (if I couldn't close, what chance did they have mentality in their heads). How did I fix this, simple, I realised that nobody can have 100% success rate and if I did, I would seem out of reach for the people I was coaching. In the rare occasion I was rejected, how I reacted to that would be just as valuable to them as if I did actually close right there. It wouldn't damage my reputation either, as long as I took the rejection well and played off of it. Madals |
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| Author: | Rawbot [ Sun May 24, 2009 5:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Beschatten, I can definitely relate. Thanks for writing this man, hope it can help us all. Madals man, what you wrote is a pretty logical reason. And possibly very true in this case.  What do you think the reason might be of not pulling the trigger, in the case where there isnt this "reputation with girls" to protect  File |
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| Author: | David~ [ Sun May 24, 2009 9:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the insight Madals and support File. Lately, I hook maybe about 60% of sets, and I get kisses from about 90% of them. I don't think it's rejection, I have adopted a mindset that will get myself put into a situation that I know will be difficult for me. I feel somewhat uncomfortable with my sexuality, like I am afraid to have sex or something. It's weird. Until about a month ago I never approached white chicks, but lately this is my only target. I think it's because I am still uncomfortable with the idea of having sex with a white girl. I couldn't even talk to a white girl a month ago, so this is just another growing pain. |
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| Author: | cunning linguist [ Mon May 25, 2009 7:11 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote:
I feel somewhat uncomfortable with my sexuality, like I am afraid to have sex or something
Besch, hope this doesn't mess with your dynamic but I can identify with the zone you're in. Impossible is nothing when it comes to opening and calibrating, kino and a k-close. No doubt some of the HBs have been inviting you to open them. Your success rate with HBs might be working against you - I sometimes feel no compulsion to pull the trigger when it all falls into place too easily with little or no chemistry. Always thought pick-up should never feel like you're taking roadkill back to your place. |
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| Author: | David~ [ Mon May 25, 2009 7:24 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I can relate to what you're saying. It's like, it's almost too easy, and my lack of pulling the trigger may occur because it's too easy and I don't want it or don't feel ready for it. I wouldn't say I'm really successful, but it's been such a dramatic improvement. |
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