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4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
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Author:  Magdiel [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:00 pm ]
Post subject:  4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Ive been in the game for at least 5 months and I wouldnt call myself a pickup artists but I wouldnt call myself an AFC either. There are some things that I just dont understand about girls and it just makes me think more of them as bitches, dont get me wrong I love girls but I think their bitches. The things I dont understand about them are...

1. Why dont girls appreciate good guys? or caring?

2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?

3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?

4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?

If anybody knows the answers to these questions I would really like to find out or if you just know the answer to one of these but not the rest it still would be very helpful.
Author:  Solomon II [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
1. Why dont girls appreciate good guys? or caring?
They do. It's just that most guys like that overdo it and the girl starts to take it for granted... and that's when shit starts to go wrong.
Quote:
2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?
Oh, they notice. In a case like that it's pretty safe to say that she's pretending not to notice cos she likes the guy. That, or she doesn't like the look of him and just plain isn't interested. Details help.
Quote:
3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?
Because you're not doing something right. Most likely you're not escalating when she expects you to. Again, details would really help.
Quote:
4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?
First date. 'Nuff said.
Author:  Magdiel [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
details about 2 and 3...

2. In my class the teacher gave us a partner who we worked with and basically we pretended to be applying for a job (one person would be the employee, and the other the employer) when we were done we wrote about what we thought about the others presentations, I was paired with this girl named Katy. She wrote things that I didnt even know I was doing she noticed alot of things. Later on we were talking and she finaly notices this new guy that was there and say to me "Is that a new student?" I thought it was completely obvious that he was everybody saw when he came in, and I was like wtf? you barley noticed.

3. I have been showed major IOI's then the next day its like if theyre not attracted anymore I mean there really nice but they dont show anymore IOI's.
Author:  V1V [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 10:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
Ive been in the game for at least 5 months and I wouldnt call myself a pickup artists but I wouldnt call myself an AFC either. There are some things that I just dont understand about girls and it just makes me think more of them as bitches, dont get me wrong I love girls but I think their bitches. The things I dont understand about them are...

1. Why dont girls appreciate good guys? or caring?

2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?

3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?

4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?

If anybody knows the answers to these questions I would really like to find out or if you just know the answer to one of these but not the rest it still would be very helpful.
girls DO care for the guys who care and they appreciate it. its just that most guys who ''care'' have traits in their behaviour such as constantly mothering. no fun - see what im getting at? i cant define it =(.
Of course they will notice when there is a new person in the class - it doesnt mean that they will act on it. if they dont then its your job to get them to.
#3 - an IOI is merely stating interest. not attraction. its multiple IOI's that say this. and just because they like it at first it doesnt mean that they will always like it. they will get bored if it stays the same. think of it like a video game - or cat & yarn theory.
love them on first date!!!! damn!!! FAR too clingy!!!
Author:  Sardonyx [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 11:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
1. Why don't girls appreciate good guys? or caring?
Women do appreciate good and caring guys, but what they appreciate more is a CHALLENGE. Too many "good guys" are just not challenging enough for most women. You may think you are a rare commodity being a "nice guy," but the truth is there are plenty of you out there - and you are BORING. Being a little challenging will spike a woman's interest quickly.
Quote:
2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?
Women seem to have selective observance. They are very in-tune to what they are paying attention to, but can also completely disregard something that is right in front of them. This is why you can go out, have perfect body language, but not have one women open you. They don't NOTICE you. That is why it is up to you to be noticed.
Quote:
3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?
Reading your later post, you are talking about when you see them at a later time and they seem to have lost all the attraction you have built. This is somewhat true. If it has just been friendly conversation, when you see her again, you need to re-establish that attraction/connection. However, it will be much easier the second time around. Just spend a couple minutes being the cool and interesting guy she remembers from the night before and she will go back to being putty in your hands.
Quote:
4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?
This goes back to being a CHALLENGE. How could your friend's bf possibly know enough about her to say he loved her on a first date? He couldn't. Therefore, his "I love you" is unfounded, cheap, and ignorant. Saying "I love you" is a big deal for women. Please don't cheapen it by saying it when it means nothing.
Author:  Magdiel [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 2:21 am ]
Post subject: 
Alright thanks for clearing that up guys. I dont think thinking of women as bitches is a good thing so I will try not too anyways thanks guys.
Author:  Bonita [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 2:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Hey Magdiel, I wish I could offer some ground breaking things to tell you but these guys are pretty spot on...but I'll still elaborate from my view.
Quote:
1. Why dont girls appreciate good guys? or caring?
Women DO appreciate nice guys but in today's society "nice guys" tend to be overbearing and smothering. By this I mean they are constantly asking if she is okay/happy, calling her all the time, seeing her all the time, and buying her stuff all the time. WHAT? did I just say he buys her stuff all the time?! Yes I did! When you buy everything for her, from dinner, movies, flowers, candy etc...each subsequent monetary gift loses its value. In that case, each gift has to get more expensive to elicit the same positive response. Basically by being TOO caring and smothering you are desensitizing her and next time you want to show you care you have to show it more...which will get overbearing. On another not, women like the chase too. Yeah we don't want you to wait a week to call us but if we have to wonder when you will call us then that builds anticipation which makes our heart beat faster, we sweat etc...which are the same psyiological responses to attraction. Plus you have us thinking about you and when you finally do call, then we return to a normal calm state...you are the one that does that so your presence makes her comfortable so in a sense you are a drug to her. Basically the other guys are right too...I just wanted to add something more that was a little more indepth....but they are all right too.
Quote:
2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?
That is not true of all women. Just because you encountered that with one girl doesn't mean all girls are like that. In reality, I'm sure all the other girls noticed him because when there is a new guy in class the first thing every girl does is check him out and decide whether or not he is dateable. I wouldn't use her one response, and your assumption, as grounds to say that women don't notice when there is a new guy in class. And if it is a new girl in class....she will notice and size up her competition.
Quote:
3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?
If she isn't showing attraction anymore maybe it wasn't attraction in the first place. My friends and I flirt a lot, but that is just our personality. We are outgoing and bubbly...but we don't flirt with guys just to mess with their heads. I have had plenty of times when guys thought I was interested in them but I had no idea they perceived my interactions with them as actual interest. So that could be the case. On the other hand, she could have been genuinely interested but either you did something to turn her off to you, or you took so long to notice that she just gave up....either way, initial attraction was not strong enough.
Quote:
4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?
Ummmmm, yeah....he freaked the poor girl out, that's why! I would say, in general women are less afraid than men to settle down and say the L word, but even at that, there are commitment-phobic women. Regardless, saying "I love you" on the first date is is extreme and shocking. She probably did not feel the same way and felt awkward being around him because she knew how he felt and didn't feel/never knew if she could feel that way about him. It says a lot about someone who can say "I love you" on the first date...(1). you found your soul-mate...lucky you!! wahooo (2) you are a clinger that needs a relationship to feel secure and to identify yourself. Most likely it is the latter of the two.




Ok I hope that cleared some stuff up...these other guys were right too, mine is just excessively long because, well, I'm a girl and I have to protect my kind :)
Author:  Chino Kapone [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 2:45 am ]
Post subject: 
The pros hit this topic perfectly. Ill just answer #4

The guy is a total tool to say I love you on the first date. Thats like a girl spreading her legs open during dinner on the first date. There is no challenge and he came off needy as fuck. What a retard.

CK
Author:  Magdiel [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 3:27 am ]
Post subject: 
I think I get it now thanks guys. And Bonita I understand where your coming from and im really glad your on this forum, I seriously was hoping id get a womens perspective on this so thanks. As for the you have to play hard to get (This I know is probably my biggest problem) when do you not play hard to get?
Author:  Bonita [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 3:31 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I think I get it now thanks guys. And Bonita I understand where your coming from and im really glad your on this forum, I seriously was hoping id get a womens perspective on this so thanks. As for the you have to play hard to get (This I know is probably my biggest problem) when do you not play hard to get?

It's not so much playing hard to get as it is just not obsessing and being overbearing. Think if a women called 3 times a day everyday just to say hi and see how you are doing. Though she may be genuine in her actions, that is just TOO much. It is just like when a guy says "you're beautiful" about 14 times in one night....yeah he may mean it, but it gets annoying after a while. So it's not always playing hard to get, but just checking your actions and thinking to yourself, am I giving her enough space to be her and just enough space for her to miss me?
Author:  kasabi [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 4:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
Quote:
3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?
If she isn't showing attraction anymore maybe it wasn't attraction in the first place. My friends and I flirt a lot, but that is just our personality. We are outgoing and bubbly...but we don't flirt with guys just to mess with their heads. I have had plenty of times when guys thought I was interested in them but I had no idea they perceived my interactions with them as actual interest. So that could be the case. On the other hand, she could have been genuinely interested but either you did something to turn her off to you, or you took so long to notice that she just gave up....either way, initial attraction was not strong enough.
Attraction is a bit of a tennis match. U throw a look, they throw a look. U say something, they say something . . . and it builds, builds, and builds.

Now, take into consideration that women are usually not in the habit of extending themselves so far. Most women I have known wanted me to bear more "risk". So U have to think about where this "balance" stands. Who's got the ball in his/her court?

Few months back, I finally worked up the singer of a rock band enough so that we just . . . well, you know when you don't have to say anything and there is this clear understanding that there's going to be a throw down that night? She was very forward. . . So the set is over and it's 3am. Her friends are gone and we're standing at the taxi stand together. I had to leave for the airport at 6am and while running the logistics in my mind, there was no way I could pull this off. I would have been late 100%. So I gave her a kiss, told her I'll see her again soon, put her in her cab and sent her on her way.

Now when I get back . . . 2 months later, she was soooo cold to me I was getting chills. I mean . . hey, I'm a man and confident and blah, blah, but it was almost hurtful. So I'm just sitting there with a buddy of mine just thinking that I fucked up big time. Anyhow, between sets, I see in the corner of my eye that I think she's staring at me. I turn slightly while chatting . . . She is staring. She's staring, staring, staring . . . So I turn my head and stare right back. It takes a few seconds for her to realize this and she turns her eyes away quickly and stares at . . . eh. . . the wall?

This episode was just a slap in the wrist for putting her "out there" and not returning her IOI's with IOI's of my own. IOI's need to be rewarded. The point is that just because she's not showing you IOI's now doesn't mean she's no longer interested. . . It could be a test & and a form of punishment for not rolling over when she clearly told you she'll give u a bone if you roll over. Start all over again, you'll get those IOI's back . . .
Author:  Sardonyx [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 4:37 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
Ok I hope that cleared some stuff up...these other guys were right too, mine is just excessively long because, well, I'm a girl and I have to protect my kind :)
Props Bonita. I'll read your long winded explanations, but only if you are defending "your kind." :lol:
Author:  jurupa [ Sun Nov 09, 2008 9:19 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 4 Things I Dont Get About Girls
Quote:
1. Why dont girls appreciate good guys? or caring?
As others have said they do. But they also don't want the overbearing guy as Bonita mentioned. They also don't want the guy with no backbone either. They want alpha male qualities.
Quote:
2. How is it possible for girls to notice so many things about others but they cant notice when we have a new person in the class!?
Most girls will notice such things. But most will also hide the fact that they notice this as well.
Quote:
3. Why do girls stop feeling attracted to you even after they have showed you major IOIS?
As Bonita girls like to flirt for fun. But if the girl was doing this for sometime and you did nothing in return then she was most likely into you and lost interest due to your inaction.
Quote:
4. Why do girls not like it when you tell them that you love them? My friend was telling me how she dumped her boyfriend and didnt like it when he told her that he loved her on their first date. WTF!?.
They do, but not on the first freaking date. That is just creepy. How would you feel if some girl said that to you on the first date?
Author:  Jaybot [ Sun Nov 09, 2008 11:57 am ]
Post subject: 
All have been answered well, I'll just add on 3.

3. I see IOI's as exactly that Indicators of Interest, in the same way if you are flicking between channels and something catches your eye, so you watch a minute or so of it. At that point you may realize you were wrong about ti and turn over or may keep watching.
So IOI's show they want to know more about you and are interested in you, in seduction/attraction terms this means you are doing something right but by no means indicates it is a sealed deal.
Author:  Bonita [ Sun Nov 09, 2008 1:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
All have been answered well, I'll just add on 3.

3. I see IOI's as exactly that Indicators of Interest, in the same way if you are flicking between channels and something catches your eye, so you watch a minute or so of it. At that point you may realize you were wrong about ti and turn over or may keep watching.
So IOI's show they want to know more about you and are interested in you, in seduction/attraction terms this means you are doing something right but by no means indicates it is a sealed deal.

Very good point Jay...I think that is a perfect answer!
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