I just wanted to let you all know, just how amazing this forum truly is. Perhaps some of you under appreciate it.
- This forum is open to any and all discussion about any and all methodologies, that's aweome!
- This forum has moderators that aren't getting paid anything are purely here and do the work for you, because they love the game, they love the community, they want to make it better and this is their passion! They won't give you a hard time about your beliefs, they won't reprimand you for stating your opinions, or tell you that you're being disrespectful without telling you why and how (if they ever DO tell you that, which is incredibly rare, as I've had guys call me an asshole and I just nod and take it into careful consideration to see why they are saying that and how I might change it).
- It's free
- No one tells you to decide whether you want to learn, or if you want to teach, you need to leave. We encourage more ideas, more concepts and although questions are great, we don't give a crap whether you ever ask a question, or whether you ever give an answer; it's up to you what you make of this forum!
You may be saying, "But Rye, we know all that! Why are you bothering to tell us?"
I'll tell you why. I joined a Lair last Sunday, against my better judgement, in the hopes of finding some people to share concepts with, improve my own game, as well as perhaps pick up a few students, get some word of mouth for my business. Didn't work out that way. I was told I was being disrespectful for disagreeing with a guy about his own material, because I used a prepositional phrase, for a question, rather than an antipositional phrase. I'll explain what that means, because that probably lost a lot of non-english geeks; when you say, "Did Joe eat dinner in the kitchen?" that's antipositional, which is how most people consider questions to be phrased; when you say, "So, Joe ate dinner in the kitchen?" that's prepositional, which is still a question, but some people take it as a statement and in a discussion, they may even say you're presuming and arguing with them.
I appologized, although they didn't explain what I had done wrong, I had to figure it out on my own and they just blinked at me when I explained the difference and that both were still relevant questions, but that I just learn better and tend to phrase things that way.
Once on the forum, I posted some material I had posted here and ended up having this guy that I had the disagreement with begin criticizing me because I thought it was rude for them to tell me it was too long and that I needed to sum it up simply. He said it was just as rude as what I'd done, because obviously I didn't understand his work he'd put time into, etc.
So discussion errupts and I'm warned for being disrespectful for telling him to let it go and stop criticizing me for a misunderstanding. Even though, he is perfectly within his rights to make multiple blatant attacks upon me.
I'm told that if I want to remain, I can't give opinionated responses to guest speakers, that I basically have to take their word as gospel. Then I am told I have to pick whether I want to teach or learn and if I want to teach, then I should form my own Lair, as if somehow the two are mutually exclusive.
None of this would have happened on this forum and is why I choose to spend my time here, rather than typically within private forums and lairs, as there is a freedom of speech that I treasure. I hope you guys can appreciate how awesome this forum is too, cause we really do have it good here and it's only getting better due to the inclusion of well known authorities within the community that freely devote their time, all the while upholding those same principles of open discussion, without getting upset over disagreements, presumptions, or any other of the issues I listed above. I've had guys that are considered gurus humbley tell me they appreciated what I said and learned something from me, while at the same time I learned something from them, there is no regulation on which way the learning goes here and that is a grand adventure!
Enjoy it boys and girls, we're entering a golden age!
Edit: Just to be clear, especially if anyone from said lair comes reads this thread; I'm not saying this is a bad lair, it's actually probably one of the better lairs I've heard about. I'm not saying lairs are bad even.
I'm just saying that I feel lairs have a flaw and that several well respected members of the community (Sean Messenger for one) share this belief with me. Typically in lairs, you end up with one guy that everyone listens to and reveres. In the lair I belonged to in Calgary, everyone mimicked this guy by dressing like him, acting like him and talking like him, whether it fitted their personality or not. This caused some people to become absolutely ridiculously incongruent. They also would do anything he said; resulting in stories of guys extinguishing candles inside cups by starving them of oxygen, resulting in 2nd degree burns and men being forced to wear dresses in public. I hear that although that's a bit extreme, the trend of having one or two leaders is incredibly common in most lairs.
I dislike that concept and I'd like to offer to anyone in the Toronto area the option of an alternative to that. Not now, but when I've established myself better in the area, to the point where I'm not just some obscure person and a few people know who I am. My plan, is to form a lair where everyone is treated as an equal. There will be no censorship of ideas or beliefs, aside from personal attacks, or anything that might be considered unlawful or discriminatory. Aside from that, it'll be an open forum (in person and online) where anyone present will have the full right to question anything said by ANYONE, whether the person questioning is a first day attendee and the person he's questioning is me, or even any guests speakers of standing within the community. I promise you that when I sit down to have a coffee or a pint with and interview Johnny Soporno within the next little while, I'm gonna question several of his concepts. I respect the guy's ideas. I LOVE a lot of them from what I heard when I listened to the DYD interview he sent me. Still, there's bound to be points of contention and I'd love to debate them with him, so that both of us can come to a more complete understanding of what precisely he means.
I'll keep everyone posted in the event this concept comes to fruition.
