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| I came off as weird....? https://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=26693 |
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| Author: | Gay [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | I came off as weird....? |
So.... I'm in Spanish class and this hot girl sits behind me. I turn around and say "hey what's your name?" and she says "Jill". She turns around, I reply with "Jill? What a boring name." and I turn back forward. She like gasped from someone insulting her. Then later I have another class with her and I said "hey jill what month were you born in?" for a icebreaker thingy, and she says whatever she said and I left... Then she needed me to sign her papaer and I did a cocky funny thing like "hmm idk if I should...." she gave me the weird look and said "just sign it". I fucked up somewhere.... Why does she think I'm creepy/weird and how should I spark a conversation with her? Also... I'm in an entire new school so I have no social proof and I'm sitting on a bent. Girls walking by, if I say hi, theyjust say hi and continue on. If i say what's they will just nod and move on. How do I get them to sit down and chat? |
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| Author: | JSmooth [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I came off as weird....? |
Quote: So.... I'm in Spanish class and this hot girl sits behind me. I turn around and say "hey what's your name?" and she says "Jill". She turns around, I reply with "Jill? What a boring name." and I turn back forward. She like gasped from someone insulting her.
Yeah dude, that's an insult in just about any country I've been too. Basically, she thinks you an ass about now, and she's going to treat you like one. This one moment is now defining your entire interaction until you do something to change her outlook on you.
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| Author: | Chino Kapone [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:28 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I came off as weird....? |
Quote: "Jill? What a boring name."
This might have had something to do with it. You completely insulted her. She should have smacked you in the back of your head with her spanish book. Instead you should have said some shit like.... "Jill, right on! Im Jack. (shake her hand) Im getting kinda thirsty, you and I just run up a hill and fetch a pale of water. " with a cocky funny smile. Or even... "Hi Jill, its a pleasure to meet you, Im Gay." Shake her hand. It is not nesicary to be cocky and funny all the time. A lot of noobs try to be overly funny to hide their insecurities. Women read right through that. |
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| Author: | onemosphere [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
you also didnt follow up with anything after you said it. you made an opening attempt that somewhat worked and then you immediatly closed yourself off by turning around and ignoring her and what just happened. |
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| Author: | Lucky D [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:00 pm ] |
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You know what you did wrong, now you need to know what to do right! as you said, you have no social proof. Create one, ASAP!! talk to people, befriend guys and girls alike. #1 priority is creating your social circle. Try to make it essentially alphas, that way you're not hanging out with AFCs, you'll have a head-start. By hanging out with them, you'll become more and more like them and it will give you auto-social proof just cause you roll with them! You want to be friends with people of every status, but you wanna hang out with the ones that are succesfully popular. One thing you could do is NOT be a dubass to everyone else (ok that sounded a lil mean). When Jill starts talking about you like "that guy's such an ass" her friends will reply "what are you talking about?? Gay's soo cool, he's like the coolest cat on campus!" Now you got Jill wondering what she is doing wrong. Why do you not like her but like everyone else, is it her fault? You can also apologize, i know that in the community, they say apologizing is a sign of weakness, but if you do it right it can do much good, especially in this kinda situation. You f-ed up, and it takes a man to admit it! You say that you just say hi, they answer back and walk away. Obviously you're doing something wrong tha doesn't make em want to talk to you. It's not just your social proof, it's something else. They say "it doesn't matter what you say, but how you say it" Say "Hi" like you're the man! say it like you know you got this! say it with a deep james bond voice, just say it with confidence! and have a second line to follow up. I'm countin on you getting great results! keep on doin your thang aight! -Lucky D |
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| Author: | Gay [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Alright, thanks everyone. I see why it came off assholeish, I just don't know how to spark a conversation. I am trying to make a social circle and sometimes I see a girl I know, but all we do is nod. I'm socially retarded  hahahaThanks again, Ill try not to be always cocky and funny |
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| Author: | Chino Kapone [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:44 pm ] |
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Quote:
Thanks again, Ill try not to be always cocky and funny
No, no... Be cocky and funny, just know when it is necessary to be genuine and humble as well. Not every answer needs to be replied with as a joke. I suggest watching comedians like Chris Rock, Brian Regan, Patrice O'Neal, Rich Vos, and watch their timing. A big part of being funny is timing. Being funny is an art, and not everyone can do it. Now is not the time to try and backpedal either. Confidently walk up to her, isolate her and say "Jill, I want to apologize for the poor attempt at a joke the other day. You seem like a cool chick, and I came off as an ass. To make it up, I'll let you peek at my Spanish homework sometime. " (kinda cocky and funny at the end) |
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| Author: | Chief [ Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:39 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
A name is something people hold very close to their hearts. Take good care of a girl's name and she'll take good care of your cock. |
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| Author: | Gay [ Tue Aug 19, 2008 1:22 am ] |
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What do you mean chief? |
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| Author: | C3 [ Tue Aug 19, 2008 5:35 am ] |
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i find chicks do not repond well when the first thing you do is neg her i think you could have got away with this neg if you used it once she was already interested in what you had to offer(also if she is not a 9 or 10 they somtimes take negs as an insult) |
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| Author: | Marlow [ Tue Aug 19, 2008 2:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: You know what you did wrong, now you need to know what to do right!
I concur. establish your name a little, build some S&R value, and the chips will fall into place. Besides, all bets are off when picking up girls in class. They may be really into the class or something, and don't want to be bothered. That, and your body positioning (you were sitting in front of the girl, if I understand correctly) severely inhibits your ability to control the frame. Your back is facing her. "Hi" is a terrible opener, by the way. Saying merely "Hi" give a girl no reason to stop and talk to you. This forum is choct-ful of great openers that will captivate her imagination and put yourself in a better position to develop a bond with your target. I would suggest browsing through those, and reading Mysterys book if you havent done so already.as you said, you have no social proof. Create one, ASAP!! talk to people, befriend guys and girls alike. #1 priority is creating your social circle. Try to make it essentially alphas, that way you're not hanging out with AFCs, you'll have a head-start. By hanging out with them, you'll become more and more like them and it will give you auto-social proof just cause you roll with them! You want to be friends with people of every status, but you wanna hang out with the ones that are succesfully popular. -Lucky D Hope this helps |
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| Author: | jurupa [ Tue Aug 19, 2008 3:28 pm ] |
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Quote: Alright, thanks everyone. I see why it came off assholeish, I just don't know how to spark a conversation. I am trying to make a social circle and sometimes I see a girl I know, but all we do is nod. I'm socially retarded As Chino said, time is key with C&F. But so is the delivery and the words used. Also when you see a girl you recognize, say hello to her at least. If you keep on nodding you aren't going to go anywhere socially. If there is time ask the girl you recognize how her day is going. Work on your chit chat as that is the bases for most conversations.
hahahaThanks again, Ill try not to be always cocky and funny |
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| Author: | Chief [ Tue Aug 19, 2008 11:54 pm ] |
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When people hear their names, it actually affects their body and mind in a unique way. People generally attach a lot of significance to their own names. When you insult someone's name, you're insulting a lot more than just a name. When you say their name sweetly or with any sort of positive feeling, they'll like you more. |
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| Author: | tret [ Wed Aug 20, 2008 12:44 am ] |
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Quote: When people hear their names, it actually affects their body and mind in a unique way. People generally attach a lot of significance to their own names. When you insult someone's name, you're insulting a lot more than just a name. When you say their name sweetly or with any sort of positive feeling, they'll like you more.
I Totally feal where you are coming from kind of like how a foreign chick says your name especially if she is interested. |
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| Author: | Rye Lee [ Wed Aug 20, 2008 12:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: When people hear their names, it actually affects their body and mind in a unique way. People generally attach a lot of significance to their own names. When you insult someone's name, you're insulting a lot more than just a name. When you say their name sweetly or with any sort of positive feeling, they'll like you more.
In the book How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, he gives 6 ways to make people like you in a nutshell; Rule 3: Remember that a man's name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in the English Language. Now, although I would find a better way to phrase that, as it leaves too much room for ambiguity, what with the language and gender bias, but aside from that, it's pretty damn true, don't you think?I spent the larger portion of my life up until about a year ago, looking for a name that I truly loved, because my given name (which should be sweet sounding to me) got me teased a lot growing up from other kids and often mispronounced by everyone from teachers, to bosses, to you name it. When I took on the name Rye though, it made a tremendous impact on how I felt when people addressed me, because they changed how the entire manner in which they spoke my name. When someone makes fun of my given name, I almost expect it (I have a bad habit of bringing up how often people screw it up even though it's a perfectly normal name), but if they mock the name that I gave myself, it bothers me, just like it bothered that girl. If you're still unconvinced of the worth of a name, then think of the use of it in the bedroom. Have you ever been having sex with a girl and told her to say your name (I know I have, but she was a little too far gone at that point to care much what I was saying, lol). Ever watched a show where someone says the wrong name in bed; now THAT is something that causes pretty much anyone to freak out! |
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