PUA Forum :: ATTENTION!! I Would Like To Hear Your Insight On The Problem

I don't usually care for sarging and not very partial towards the majority of girls found in clubs. However, a guy I'm teaching needed to learn how to push through AA and etc. Well he did fairly good on each approach and only one or two of his sets went bad that night out of like eight. However, each set that was going good the same thing happened to him. A girl would come over that wasn't initially in the group and pull her away, for whatever reason.

Sometimes after this happened, the target would proximity him. Or make eye contact. But he was not confident enough to approach the same target after that happened. Now we are in Louisiana and my friend is a 6'2, 250lbs African American and the majority of girls he games are white. Any insights into fixes/things to implement in his game to try to prevent this problem?

Author:	DJ_Secret [ Mon Jun 02, 2008 2:16 pm ]
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so he got pussy-blocked. omg...the great hobbit is not asking for another person's opinion is he?

Author:	Brad [ Mon Jun 02, 2008 3:00 pm ]
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From what you’ve said, I think it’s too early tell whether he’s reached a sticking point, but, he’s new to the game, and as such he’ll make many mistakes… so tell him it’s no big deal! Most of us have been there and done it, including being slapped and probably drinks thrown over. As part of his inner game development, he needs to develop a thicker skin and stronger frame control so he’s not worried about or phased by rejection or insults. Also, a deeper understanding of masculinity will help too: women expect guys to approach, that’s why they give IOIs. So, tell him it’s his job to approach (because he's male) and initiate conversations with women he likes, including re-opening girls/sets. Once he’s got 500 or more approaches under his belt, he’ll feel much more confident!

Author:	Roads [ Tue Jun 03, 2008 2:01 am ]
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Quick, simple fix: tell him to wave her over. Automatic isolation, the girl comes to him so there's no compound pressure of reopening a large set, and if she does come over it's a huge confidence booster because she's obviously interested. Keep in mind he will still have to merge her back into the set to reassure her friends that he's an OK guy. Having said that, social pressure will cause her to politely decline most of the time. Being a 6'2, 250lb black dude doesn't exactly help ease this type of pressure, especially in the deep south. He will have to show the set that he is nonthreatening so her friends will feel comfortable with her being with him. On the other hand, have you tried telling him to approach single sets? A lone wolf will jump if he excites her enough, regardless of race. Try having him run some day game.

Author:	Hopeless Romantic [ Tue Jun 03, 2008 3:33 am ]
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Sounds like he needs to learn how to be a little more in control. If her friend randomly comes over and takes her away he needs to figure out how to handle the interruption. Inner game will help with this as well as frame control. Have you tried winging with him to watch him in a set? That could give you insight into how he's doing.

Author:	The Doctor [ Tue Jun 03, 2008 5:20 am ]
Post subject:	Re: ATTENTION!! I Would Like To Hear Your Insight On The Pro
Quote: I don't usually care for sarging and not very partial towards the majority of girls found in clubs. However, a guy I'm teaching needed to learn how to push through AA and etc. Well he did fairly good on each approach and only one or two of his sets went bad that night out of like eight. However, each set that was going good the same thing happened to him. A girl would come over that wasn't initially in the group and pull her away, for whatever reason. Sometimes after this happened, the target would proximity him. Or make eye contact. But he was not confident enough to approach the same target after that happened. Now we are in Louisiana and my friend is a 6'2, 250lbs African American and the majority of girls he games are white. Any insights into fixes/things to implement in his game to try to prevent this problem? What kind of game is he running? Direct or Indirect? How far in is he when this happens? Just starting, Attraction, Qualification, Comfort... Something is going wrong in the calibration, but if we can find 1 or more patterns why can isolate the problem and deal with it.

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Author:	Rye Lee [ Tue Jun 03, 2008 7:10 pm ]
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Sounds like external obstacles that aren't comfortable enough with him to allow him to continue running game on the target. It's just like when the obstacle is in the group, if the obstacle doesn't think the guy is good enough to be talking to the target, then they'll drag her away and cockblock. Solution, be quick on his feet. He has to be able to be aware of his surroundings, so that if he sees someone like this approaching, he can switch attention to them, engage them and pull them into the set in order to build some comfort with them and not be blocked. If he's focused on the target too much and doesn't notice the obstacle come in, then he's screwed, you HAVE to be aware of your surroundings as a PUA, because stuff like this happens to everyone, big black man or little white guy. Generally I'll ignore the target mostly and turn to the approaching obstacle with arms open saying, "HEY! Who's this?!" get the target to introduce me, now the obstacle feels obligated to talk for a moment or she's REALLY rude and within a few seconds I've displayed that I'm a cool guy, so she no longer drags the friend away.

Author:	The Doctor [ Wed Jun 04, 2008 11:10 pm ]
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Quote: He is running the standard mystery stuff. He is indirect approaching, asking a opinion opener. I think he was using the difference between hot and cute. It would happen within the first five minutes, while he was still in attraction. Interesting... I see this as either a string of bad timing, where he just happened to approach at a time when an obstacle was away, giving her the opportunity to blow him out when she returned... Or perhaps his routines thoughts and plans are saying indirect game, but some other part of him is saying direct game... perhaps his body language, tonality, perhaps as Rye Lee said hes paying more attention to the target directly. If this is more then just a string of bad luck, then I'm putting this on congruency. The reason why MM works for Mystery and SS Works for Ross and (typically) direct game works for a natural is congruency. If someone has a frown nad tears in there eyes and they claim to be happy, not sad, or "ok"... you know thats a lie. Women tend to have very strong natural congruency detection skills because they need them for child raising... My guess is that something he is doing is coming across inconguently with his desired frame and therefore a part of the target/obstacle is thinking he seems a bit fake. Ah Hobbit, now for the joy of teaching... you now get to analyze all of his non-verbal ques until you pin-point the incongruency. Have fun, and rememebr it'll be worth it when you see him get that confidence that only comes by being a closer.

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