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acceptable to crack jokes about urself?
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Author:  Class.. [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 11:52 am ]
Post subject:  acceptable to crack jokes about urself?
ok ive been wondering about this for a while, alot of people say its a bad idea to say negative things about urself, but ive done it a few times AS A JOKE and its gotten a few laughs, a jk i normally use is with money, sometimes in a convo i complain about drink prices, not whinge but jk around, and say something like "yea thanks to drink prices my account balance is and will remain .42c for a while lol" also if i get knocked back from a club, and it comes up in convo with another girl, id say something like"oo yea, he didnt let me in cause i look so intimidating, i mean look at the size of me!" (just so u know, im a small guy)...now b4 any "hows ur inner game" questions come in2 it..thats not my point

my point is, IS it ever acceptable to crack a jk about urself in that way?? or is that a big no no??
Author:  butterfield [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 2:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
I wouldn't reccommend it. Ive done it all my life and it has made myself vunerable to abuse, if they see you taking the piss out of urself then they will see it as an acceptable thing to do. You want to be bigging yourself up without sounding like ur braging. There are plenty of other ways to be funny.
Author:  discreet [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 3:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Jokes at your own expense - money well spent
Yes it is acceptable to crack jokes about yourself but only to assist your game NOT just to get a laugh.

I've often found that if your inner game is strong, girls can be intimidated by you and will be discouraged from sparring with you, or they may be turned off completely cos you come off looking like you're unattainable.

A carefully placed self-deprecating joke can help her relax around you, and shows that you are confident enough to make fun of yourself. Also if you've overdone it with the negs you can make a joke at your own expense if you sense you've pushed too far.

I'm a short guy too and just one joke about my height (such as being a champion sumo wrestler cos of my low centre of gravity) is enough to let someone know that even though I'm short, my frame is 40 ft tall, and I don't have short man syndrome. But just ONE joke. too many is proving you do have a complex, and opens up the floor to others making jokes about your height all night.
Author:  Hengman [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 3:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: acceptable to crack jokes about urself?
Quote:
ok ive been wondering about this for a while, alot of people say its a bad idea to say negative things about urself, but ive done it a few times AS A JOKE and its gotten a few laughs, a jk i normally use is with money, sometimes in a convo i complain about drink prices, not whinge but jk around, and say something like "yea thanks to drink prices my account balance is and will remain .42c for a while lol" also if i get knocked back from a club, and it comes up in convo with another girl, id say something like"oo yea, he didnt let me in cause i look so intimidating, i mean look at the size of me!" (just so u know, im a small guy)...now b4 any "hows ur inner game" questions come in2 it..thats not my point

my point is, IS it ever acceptable to crack a jk about urself in that way?? or is that a big no no??
NEVER fuckin' throw yourself down.

It's a big DLV and it's pretty damn chode like. Girls sense it as you having LSE issues.
Author:  Ka [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 7:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
Just to be clear, there is a huge difference between your first example and your second. In the first one you never make fun of yourself, your bank account is not you.

In your second example you tak a shot at yourself, thats a no-no. The only time i recommend making fun of yourself is to counter AMOG, and it must be done carefully and confidently.

For instance a guy tries to AMOG me by calling me gay, and i may respond, "Yea man im definatly flaming, but why are you hitting on me..." you know something like that. What this does is disarm his reason for making fun of you and then flips it on him.

So id say as a general rule, NO...also you need to really get the difference between your examples..it will allow you to make jokes without harming your status.
Author:  Roads [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 3:01 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yep, just don't devalue yourself in front of others, but at the same time some light hearted comments about yourself goes a long way to making that overbearing alpha side of you easier to swallow. So for example you can call yourself a klutz if you knock something over but don't say "Oh I'm useless!" or anything that would devalue yourself just because you said it.
Author:  3 hands [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 7:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
Actually I've found that doing some self depricating humor is fine however, ONLY when you are an intimidating person (like me). You can be too perfect and people are intimidated by it. If you catch yourself being too intimidating you can use A BIT OF(not a lot) small clear and FUNNY self depricating humor.
Author:  Durus [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 7:56 pm ]
Post subject: 
I actually like to make fun of my penis size... I do it for a few reasons and I'd actually like to get people's opinions on whether or not you think my reasons are sound...

First of all, I do it in a VERY over the top manner so it's obvious I'm joking. I say that It's like the size of a chapstick but I'm Irish so it's not my fault. I'll also usually throw in something about how most of the time when girls ask if I'm in yet I'm already done and falling asleep. This always gets them laughing.

I then phase shift, get a bit more serious, and start to talk about how I think guys that brag about having a big penis are usually insecure (which, of course, implies that I am secure in myself by contrast), and how I think it's way funnier to talk about how small mine is. I then usually tell a story about how I had an ex who thought I was serious when I made fun of myself and was worried that I really did have a small penis but was relieved when she discovered that I don't (hits various spikes... preselection, yaddayaddayadda... also reassures her that it's not really tiny).

I think it's a pretty good strategy to introduce sexual topics into a conversation using humor and to get her thinking about my junk.

Thoughts?
Author:  Chino Kapone [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 8:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
Chapstick, thats funny Durus.... I used say im hung like a tuna can... A girl would give the "WTF" eyes and then bust out laughing.
Author:  Rye Lee [ Sun Apr 06, 2008 9:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Self depricating humor is a good thing at the right time and in the right amounts, just like any other tactics you employ in a conversation, such as negging, kino or push/pull.

I use it frequently, because I've often been told that "you think pretty highly of yourself" or other things that suggest people think I'm better than them, thus by cracking a joke at my expense, I show them that I don't think that and that they are free to join in the fun. I neg a LOT, because that's part of who I am, but I make it fun and to keep their interest through all the negging, I will show them that they can neg me back and then we have play fights, which gives opportunities for kino and to say some edgy things that I wouldn't get away with in a serious context, to build attraction faster.

Again, this is just another tactic like anything you've been using and you need to learn to calibrate it.

What Ka said about not making fun of your size and being intimidating and such, I disagree with, because I say stuff like that all the time, joking about being huge an intimidating, which is just like a neg you would say to a girl, it has a positive (being big and strong) and a negative (being intimidating and not getting into the bar), so she will join in and play with you.

The whole idea is not to ever say it in a way where it sounds depressing or like you're just beating yourself up, you are always just saying it because you're having fun and it's a joke. As long as you're having fun, then she's gonna have fun. Just remember not to over-do it and become "the funny guy", because he doesn't get attraction, so you have to calibrate.
Author:  HBhitman [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 1:20 am ]
Post subject: 
From what I've researched, as long as the humor is OBVIOUSLY humor, it's good to go. For example, if you talk about how crappy you dress while you're sporting an $80 hugo boss shirt, it's obvious you're playing and not serious. If you talk about how unattractive you are and it's obvious you've got a HUGE EGO, you're obviously joking and aren't serious.

Another concept I've heard (on the topic of Class' second joke) is that if you can't change something about yourself ACCENTUATE it. Change what you can, ACCENTUATE what you can't. In other words, bring attention to it. I think you can pull this off without DHV'ing yourself. Also, let's keep in mind that a womans attraction level is more like a dial than an on-off switch. In other words, even if you say something that slightly lowers your value at the moment, you can easily turn that around with a few DHV routines and nothing is lost. She'll be able to tell if you're money or not. A quick joke about yourself in reference to something you can't change and you're totally ok with is fine.
Author:  hollywoodinpa [ Tue Apr 08, 2008 11:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree with HBHITMAN on this one. Remember great things come in moderation !!!!!!!!
Author:  Killians [ Wed Apr 09, 2008 7:00 am ]
Post subject: 
I have always thought that sometimes saying negative things about yourself A) shows confidence B) shows that you have a sense of humor. Of course you have to do it in a joking sort of way. The way you say it is key. People that are able to laugh at their mistakes/faults are VERY confident in themselves. The only way that it can come off that you have low self esteem is if you just say "I am fat" "Just look at me I am a toothpick"

Someone above mentioned that if you do it then you are going to be susceptible to abuse. Untrue. If anything it is the exact opposite. Lots of times people make fun of others because they see that it bothers them.
Author:  Chino Kapone [ Wed Apr 09, 2008 4:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
I used to use it as a defense mechanism. People would crack a joke on me, but if i can laugh at myself or make an even worse joke then their joke is not as funny or does less damage..... In turn i think its an overall bad thing. You can be seen as a negative person depending on the situation.
Author:  Killians [ Wed Apr 09, 2008 6:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I used to use it as a defense mechanism. People would crack a joke on me, but if i can laugh at myself or make an even worse joke then their joke is not as funny or does less damage..... In turn i think its an overall bad thing. You can be seen as a negative person depending on the situation.
I wouldn't try to crack a worse joke but laughing at the joke shows that you don't give a damn about what they just said.
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