PUA Forum :: He Still Wants To Be Friends

I get a feeling these types of guys still hang on to the hope that MAYBE one day she'll change her mind.

Putting myself in the shoes of women who have this happen to them all the time, I can't help but sympathize with how tough it must be to have all these people trying to establish these inauthentic friendships with you all the time. They guilt you with the burden of obligation all the time and I can only imagine the experience to be outright draining.

This is definitely a topic worth discussing.

Quote:

I don't think it's always necessarily draining. If you have things in common, you can enjoy such friendships on occasion. But here's the thing, some men don't get the message that it's strictly friendship. They'll spend months on end 'being friends', getting nowhere with these women, and then one day (some) they snap at her for being a total bitch that lead them on. Which is not the case. I think the message is very clear when she says, "I'm not interested in a relationship with you, the chemistry isn't there, I'm sorry."

There's usually a sob story that goes along with it. "I just got out of a bad relationship", "it feels like we're moving too fast", "I have so much going on right now". It's the whole act of trying to not hurt a guys feelings and letting him down easy that makes them think that they can wait it out.

There are very few women that will outright say that nothing is ever going to happen. At the most it's usually, "I just don't see you like that" and the dumb dumbs see it as "I just don't see you like that right now."

Quote:

True, if you're going to say a sob story like that, it's understandable why such men might wait it out.

Ah no, nowadays I'm very direct. Last one I was beyond direct- please understand, I am not interested in a relationship with you at all.

Still wants to be friends.......

Author:	HT23VWY67 [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 7:45 am ]
Post subject:	He Still Wants To Be Friends
If the girl says she does not want a relationship with him, is not attracted to him, and it's best to be friends, and if the guy still insists on being friends with her? After he's tried physical moves on her and she's rejected his advances. And he still wants to be friends, sends her messages frequently, still wants to hang out with her? I get a feeling these types of guys still hang on to the hope that MAYBE one day she'll change her mind. Even if they say they 'get it', I have trouble believing this. I just don't see the point of men that are strongly attracted to a woman to want to continue being 'just friends' without having hope for more.

Author:	Chief [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 9:56 am ]
Post subject:	Re: He Still Wants To Be Friends
Quote: I get a feeling these types of guys still hang on to the hope that MAYBE one day she'll change her mind. Yup. Desperation is a funny thing. Scarcity mentality, too. You can also blame the messages in mass media (Hollywood, etc.) that tell young men that beautiful women are trophies to be won through supplicative effort. Putting myself in the shoes of women who have this happen to them all the time, I can't help but sympathize with how tough it must be to have all these people trying to establish these inauthentic friendships with you all the time. They guilt you with the burden of obligation all the time and I can only imagine the experience to be outright draining. This is definitely a topic worth discussing.

Author:	HT23VWY67 [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 2:33 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: He Still Wants To Be Friends
Quote: Putting myself in the shoes of women who have this happen to them all the time, I can't help but sympathize with how tough it must be to have all these people trying to establish these inauthentic friendships with you all the time. They guilt you with the burden of obligation all the time and I can only imagine the experience to be outright draining. This is definitely a topic worth discussing. I don't think it's always necessarily draining. If you have things in common, you can enjoy such friendships on occasion. But here's the thing, some men don't get the message that it's strictly friendship. They'll spend months on end 'being friends', getting nowhere with these women, and then one day (some) they snap at her for being a total bitch that lead them on. Which is not the case. I think the message is very clear when she says, "I'm not interested in a relationship with you, the chemistry isn't there, I'm sorry."

Author:	JackZero [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 3:03 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: He Still Wants To Be Friends
Quote: Quote: Putting myself in the shoes of women who have this happen to them all the time, I can't help but sympathize with how tough it must be to have all these people trying to establish these inauthentic friendships with you all the time. They guilt you with the burden of obligation all the time and I can only imagine the experience to be outright draining. This is definitely a topic worth discussing. I don't think it's always necessarily draining. If you have things in common, you can enjoy such friendships on occasion. But here's the thing, some men don't get the message that it's strictly friendship. They'll spend months on end 'being friends', getting nowhere with these women, and then one day (some) they snap at her for being a total bitch that lead them on. Which is not the case. I think the message is very clear when she says, "I'm not interested in a relationship with you, the chemistry isn't there, I'm sorry." Let's be honest here though. Most of the time women don't say "let's be friends" and leave it at that. There's usually a sob story that goes along with it. "I just got out of a bad relationship", "it feels like we're moving too fast", "I have so much going on right now". It's the whole act of trying to not hurt a guys feelings and letting him down easy that makes them think that they can wait it out. There are very few women that will outright say that nothing is ever going to happen. At the most it's usually, "I just don't see you like that" and the dumb dumbs see it as "I just don't see you like that right now."

Author:	HT23VWY67 [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 3:15 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: He Still Wants To Be Friends
Quote: There's usually a sob story that goes along with it. "I just got out of a bad relationship", "it feels like we're moving too fast", "I have so much going on right now". It's the whole act of trying to not hurt a guys feelings and letting him down easy that makes them think that they can wait it out. There are very few women that will outright say that nothing is ever going to happen. At the most it's usually, "I just don't see you like that" and the dumb dumbs see it as "I just don't see you like that right now." True, if you're going to say a sob story like that, it's understandable why such men might wait it out. Ah no, nowadays I'm very direct. Last one I was beyond direct- please understand, I am not interested in a relationship with you at all. Still wants to be friends.......

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Author:	Mr. Assertive [ Sat Jul 23, 2016 8:29 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: He Still Wants To Be Friends
Quote: Quote: There's usually a sob story that goes along with it. "I just got out of a bad relationship", "it feels like we're moving too fast", "I have so much going on right now". It's the whole act of trying to not hurt a guys feelings and letting him down easy that makes them think that they can wait it out. There are very few women that will outright say that nothing is ever going to happen. At the most it's usually, "I just don't see you like that" and the dumb dumbs see it as "I just don't see you like that right now." True, if you're going to say a sob story like that, it's understandable why such men might wait it out. Ah no, nowadays I'm very direct. Last one I was beyond direct- please understand, I am not interested in a relationship with you at all. Still wants to be friends....... You'll get those. But oh well. Keep up the directness, hopefully more women will catch on.

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